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So i recently decided to get back into the dating game after what happened this last summer. Just to recap, this is what happened last summer...
I lost my virginity by a way that should never have happened, and ended up getting pregnaut with the guys kid. Well, then I told my best friend, who I thought was gay. Turns out he wasn't gay and he wanted to go out with me. Well, due to my religion, I'm not allowed to kill so abortion was out of the question. And the more I'd begun to think about it, the more I began to love the child that I didn't even know yet. So he said that he didn't mind, because how it happened wasn't my fault.
No matter how fucked up it was, my friend and I grew extremely close over the summer and I fell in love with him. He got diagnosed with the late stages of pancreatic cancer and died about 2 months later. I still had the baby, but fell into deep depression. Already I'd been dealing with previous shit and it was getting worse. And I began to get aggressive at school. My body was dealing with an immensive amount of stress from being pregnaut and lack of nutrition and serious premeditated injuries from my father that should've killed me.
In the end, I lost the baby. I'd named her Eernaeria, from the old Hawaiian shamanic word for peace. It was a miscarriage from at least 4 months into the pregnancy. I attempted suicide. I was done.
So now I'm back in the dating game and I'm with this wonderful guy. It's a little rocky for us sometimes, but we're making it.
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2015-11-17
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this sucks damn you google plus

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please.... ask for help. that's what the members on here on here to do.
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