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Paranoid Mindset (from: Grandiosity and Intimacy: The Roots of Paranoia)

Counterintuitively, with paranoid intimate partners, it is better to share everything and to be utterly and unmitigatingly honest. No matter how bad and hurtful, reality always comforts them because it is so much less egregious and menacing than their own suspicions, paranoid scenarios, and hypervigilance. The paranoid's best friend is reality and his worst enemy is his rampant, morbid, catastrophizing imagination.


She: I like (this man at work) a lot. I am attracted to him.

He: She is honest and trustworthy. If something happens with that man she will tell me. It is only human to be attracted to other people. I am also telling her when I find other women attractive. Sharing honestly makes me feel safe, secure, and good. Makes me feel that I am on top of the situation (in control). I will never be hurt and surprised because I will always know everything in advance.

She: (NOT SHARING because she is conflict-averse)

He: She is human and, therefore, she is probably attracted to other men. But she is not telling me. She is not sharing with me her attraction to other men. She is being dishonest with me. Who knows what else she is not telling me. She is probably fucking some of these men that she is attracted to and not telling me about. I feel threatened, unsafe, insecure, deceived, cheated, and stabbed in the back. Things are getting out of control. I must end this.

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CURE FOR NARCISSISM! Please spread the word about this seminar! Watch this video:

Dear Participant,

You are invited to attend the first ever certification seminar for a new treatment modality, “Cold Therapy”.

The seminar will be held in Vienna, Austria, May 12-14, 2017 in the Matteo Room of Hotel am Stephensplatz (

Participation fee: 300 euros (c. 330 USD)

Click on this link to secure your place: (scroll to the bottom of the page to pay).

Bring a paying friend or colleague to the seminar and get a refund of 10% (30 USD)!

What is Cold Therapy?

Watch this video:

Cold Therapy was developed by Sam Vaknin ( ), author of “Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited” and other books about personality disorders ( )

Cold Therapy is a radical departure from current tenets of most treatment modalities. It is especially effective in the treatment of Narcissistic ( ) and Antisocial ( Personality Disorders ( and certain mood disorders, including dysthimia and major depressive episodes (clinical depression of both exogenous and endogenous aetiologies).

Cold Therapy deploys tools from the arsenal of child psychology to treat these disorders because of their roots in attachment dysfunctions and arrested development. The therapy seeks to recreate an environment conducive to the replication of original childhood traumas (re-traumatization) so as to allow the client to resolve them as an adult.

More about Cold Therapy

Developed by Sam Vaknin, Cold Therapy is based on two premises: (1) That narcissistic disorders are actually forms of complex post-traumatic conditions; and (2) That narcissists are the outcomes of arrested development. Consequently, Cold Therapy borrows techniques from child psychology and from treatment modalities used to deal with PTSD.

Cold Therapy consists of the re-traumatization of the narcissistic client in a hostile, non-holding environment which resembles the ambience of the original trauma. The adult patient successfully tackles this second round of hurt and thus resolves early childhood conflicts and achieves closure rendering his now maladaptive narcissistic defenses redundant, unnecessary, and obsolete.

Cold Therapy makes use of proprietary techniques such as erasure (suppressing the client’s speech and free expression and gaining clinical information and insights from his reactions to being so stifled). Other techniques include: grandiosity reframing, guided imagery, negative iteration, erasure, happiness map, mirroring, escalation, role play, assimilative confabulation, hypervigilant referencing, and re-parenting.

The therapy then makes use of Lidija Rangelovska’s “Spiral of Healing” to revisit the original traumas, but this time in a holding environment, replete with empathy and emotions.


Cold Therapy

Lecturer: Sam Vaknin, author of “Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited”


10:00-10:15 Registration

10:15-12:00 Introductory Lecture Module 1

Introduction to Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) in the DSM-IV-TR, DSM 5, and ICD10

Types of narcissists: overt/covert/inverted, somatic/cerebral, schizoid, paranoid, acquired situational

Comorbidity of NPD with other Cluster B personality disorders and mental health problems (mood disorders, eating disorders, autism spectrum, etc.)

12:00-12:15 Coffee Break

12:15 -14:00 Introductory Lecture Module 2

Treatment modalities in Cluster B personality disorders: CBT, CEBT, REBT, DBT, Schema, Dynamic Psychotherapy (Psychodynamic Therapy, Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy), Psychoanalysis, Gestalt, Group Therapy

14:00-15:00 Lunch Break

15:00-17:00 Module 3: The Narcissist in Therapy

Presenting signs and symptoms

Problems with clinical interview: anamnesis, diagnosis, and prognosis

Problems with psychological tests and interpretation (focus on NPI and MMPI)

Narcissistic defenses and resistances of patient/client

Working without a therapeutic alliance

Setting realistic therapy goals: behavior modification, reconciling lifestyle and choices with the patient’s pathological/secondary narcissism, settling on an extended time frame, the measurement of outcomes.


10:00-10:15 Registration

10:15-12:00 Module 4: The Therapist

Idealization and devaluation cycles

Coping with transference and countertransference

The therapist’s narcissistic defenses

Resentment, alienation, and burnout

Cooptation and collusion

The therapist as a victim

12:00-12:15 Coffee break

12:15-14:00 Module 5: Introduction to Cold Therapy Treatment Plan and Session Management

Leveraging the False Self, the psychological defense mechanisms, and the narcissist’s grandiosity

Tackling cognitive deficits, thinking errors and fallacies, and victim stance

Contracting and alliancing

The role of medication and placebos in the therapy

Confrontation, persecutory delusions, narcissistic rage, and shame

14:00-15:00 Lunch break

15:00-17:00 Module 6: Cold Therapy Techniques

Comfort zone (hostile) non-holding/unsafe environment

Grandiosity reframing

Guided imagery

Negative iteration


Happiness map



Role play

Assimilative confabulation

Hypervigilant referencing


Other scoring

17:00-17:15 Coffee Break


10:00-10:15 Registration

10:15-15:00 Module 7: Simulated Cold Therapy Sessions (mock therapy, gamification)

14:00-15:00 Lunch break

15:00-17:00 Module 7: Simulated Cold Therapy Supervision

17:00-17:15 Coffee Break

17:15-18:00 Evaluation and certificates

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NEW VIDEO Stacey The Sparkling Star feels sad for narcissists

Watch 370+ Videos about narcissists, psychopaths, and abuse in relationships - click on this link to visit my channel:

Abused? Stalked? Harassed? Victimized? Afraid? Confused? Need HELP? DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! You OWE IT to yourself and to YOUR LOVED ONES! Save $63!!! BUY SIXTEEN e-books about toxic relationships with narcissists and psychopaths - for the PRICE OF A SINGLE PRINT BOOK! Click on this link:

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The BIBLE of NARCISSISM Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited in Barnes and Noble now COSTS $40 instead of $55!!!


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Malignant Self-love: Narcissism Revisited on Facebook:

My print book, e-books (electronic books), and video lectures are available for purchase here:

Abused? Stalked? Harassed? Victimized? Afraid? Confused? Need HELP? DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT! You OWE IT to yourself and to YOUR LOVED ONES! Save $63!!! BUY SIXTEEN e-books about toxic relationships with narcissists and psychopaths - for the PRICE OF A SINGLE PRINT BOOK! Click on this link:

Kindle Books about Narcissists, Psychopaths, and Abusive Relationships - click on these links: (Amazon USA) (Amazon UK)

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Overcoming Narcissistic Abuse 1 Day Meetup in Birmingham, UK - Click on this link to learn more and to register:

From the creators of 'Surviving The Narcissistic Ex Partner'


17 JUNE 2017, Birmingham. 10.30am - 5pm Tickets £35 + £1.50 booking fee. Book here and get full details:



A day of key industry expert speakers on Narcissism who will advise on how to overcome and combat abuse, how a Narcissists mind works and recovery and survival techniques. There will also be real survivors talking about their recovery and how they have managed to overcome and walk away from the ex Narcissist. You will have the opportunity to take part in a question and answer session, talk to other victims and to meet other like minded women who have gone through the same traumatic experiences as yourself!
Seats are strictly limited so please book early to avoid disappointment

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