Post has attachment - My music comes from a realm of past experiences filled with treachery, cheaters, fake friends, a snitchy family & whore girlfriends. It also comes from times of being locked up in juvi, mental asylums and twisted emotions from my ADHD/Autism/Bipolarity/Skitzo. Its tainted me. Broken me. Corrupted me. I have trust issues BADLY. I stay on my phone looking at nothing at all. I convict people as guilty before innocent. I can hardly hold a real conversation without being overly passionate. It's almost impossible for me to have a real-life relationship, so all my "friends" are online and worldwide because in my twisted logic, that's the way to keep friends and keep safe. I can't pray-- ever-- without sobbing my eyes to exhaustion & half the times, people think I just got done getting jumped for an hour. When a person wants to become my friend, my skitzo acts up intensely and interrogates my subconscious, "What does he want? What is he trying to get out of me? He's probably fake. Probably has ninja daggers hidden, waiting for my back to turn. He wants my money and I'm BROKE ASF. He wants to smoke my weed while contributing nothing. He wants a ride home, prolly, bc like EVERYBODY ELSE I MET, THIS BITCH IS A BALLER THAT HAS TO FUCKING WALK!" It comes from being born with chronic depression & having self-mutilative & suicidal tendencies. From being homesick and forced to move from my indigenous land of California. I am not well-adjusted. I'm terrified of the most ridiculous things-- loneliness, never being able to hold self-love & I have a phobia of drowning in a shark pool (shark pool = MW's term for hoes/sleeping around). It comes from the time I was savagely raped for a week on my 1st gf bc I never had a sex talk with anyone, so I didn't have the armor. From being molested. From being isolated. From being on the second string in my family.

It comes from a very real place. That's why I'm pushing it so hard.
Without making music... I would have committed suicide.
6 years ago.
So when I say 'thank you' to my fans & people who are just generally curious...
It's not just words.
You hear words, but to me, there is a stream of infinite galaxies in the cosmos expelling from my mouth.
Even if you only heard 15 seconds...
McCarren West
McCarren West

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I love the band AWOLNATION! Here is a link to one of their videos:
AWOLNATION - Kill Your Heroes (Official)
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