forgive me, I need to vent/rant ... please ...
the season is changing, which as many know, brings an RSD flare like clock work. add to that a lot more though.
since november, no oct. I've been losing weight. it's physically hard to eat. i am getting just barely enough to keep nourished. worse thing about it, we [me, my loved one, drs] have NO IDEA why. [and obviously, if you don't know WHAT you are "fighting" it's kind of hard to win the fight]
I also help run a youth program. it's a beacon of sorts. we help a lot of people. BUT we can only do so much right?
In the course of helping, I am 'expected' to take on a lot, like a LOT. I'm almost expected to work miracles [or so it seems].
I've been bending over so far backwards [well you finish the saying] and I can only bend so far before I break.
I'm up against something right now. I'm standing on my principles and standing up for MY RIGHT to privacy in a matter, and some are acting like I'm just not trying to help somebody in need.
People keep changing 'deadlines', they lie to me, change their 'stories' condescend, won't listen ... act like I should be able to do as THEY want ... they ignore my RSD, they ignore I am but one man, I can't drive, I hardly can sleep well ...
I'm so ready to give up trying [NOT suicidal here, not in the least, I mean giving up on trying to do things like help etc] my 3 best friends, and my brother [and his gf] and I think my Pastor all seem to understand and back me up ... one local police officer seems to [this week at least lol] but many others, my mom [since Im disabled, I live with my family; mom, step dad, a sister, a brother and his gf] some others in the youth program, some state workers [well one, ONE seems to understand, but nobody is listening to him. whether I quote him or if its him directly]
urgh ... thanks for listening!