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Kyrinn S. Eis
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URUTSK: World of Mystery
URUTSK: World of Mystery

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If you like my writing / game design, please feel free to use the link to Donate.

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As the story goes, this happened in France to an Englishman who was totally drunk.

A French policeman stops the Englishman's car and asks if he has been drinking.

With great difficulty and slurring of words, the Englishman admits that he has been drinking all day, that his daughter got married that morning, and that he drank champagne plus a few bottles of wine at the reception, and many single malts scotches thereafter.

Quite upset, the policeman proceeds to alcohol-test (breath test) the Englishman and verifies that he is indeed completely hammered. Vous êtes ivre, monsieur.

He asks the Englishman if he knows why, under French Law, he is going to be arrested.

The Englishman answers with a bit of humor, "No sir, I do not! But while we're asking questions, do you realize that this is a British car and my wife is driving . . . on the other side?" 
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+Greg Gorgonmilk posted, "Have the henchmen draw straws to see who surveys this room down here."

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The Washington Post's Style Invitational also asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners:

1. Bozone (N.): The substance surrounding stupid people that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.

2. Foreploy (V): Any misrepresentation about yourself for the purpose of getting laid.

3. Cashtration (N.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period.

4. Giraffiti (N): Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.

5. Sarchasm (N): The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

6. Inoculatte (V): To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.

7. Hipatitis (N): Terminal coolness.

8. Osteopornosis (N): A degenerate disease. (This one got extra credit.)

9. Karmageddon (N): It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then, like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.

10. Decafalon (N.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.

11. Glibido (V): All talk and no action.

12. Dopeler effect (N): The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.

13. Arachnoleptic fit (N.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.

14. Beelzebug (N.): Satan in the form of a mosquito that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.

15. Caterpallor (N.): The color you turn after finding half a grub in the fruit you're eating.

And the pick of the literature:

16. Ignoranus (N): A person who's both stupid and an assh*le

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Guess who graduated today?

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Found this on Twitter. Ancient Roman roads done mapped as a subway system. 
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Shout it Loud and Proud.

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