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bob melonosky
Worked at National Lampoon as a Contributing Writer for a couple of months until we all were replaced with videos of frat guys peeing in their pants -- but I'm not bitter.
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bob melonosky

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This Week's Rejected Daily Mail Comments -- 7/16/15
Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see
each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of
crap for my blog. When you really, really need to see celebrity nipples poking through ski...
Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of crap for my blog. When you really, really need to see cel...
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bob melonosky

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This Week's Rejected Daily Mail Comments -- 7/1/15
Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see
each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of
crap for my blog. When you really, really need to see celebrity nipples poking through ski...
Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of crap for my blog. When you really, really need to see cel...
1
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bob melonosky

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Bristol Palin Teen Abstinence Queen Pregnant Again
Bristol Palin, The Paid Princess of Teen Abstinence, is pregnant again. Earlier this month,  Bristol Palin tweeted:   How many guys in Alaska are jumping into their 4-wheel drive pickups and heading for Canada today? Here's a rerun from back in the day. DWT...
Bristol Palin, The Paid Princess of Teen Abstinence, is pregnant again. Earlier this month,  Bristol Palin tweeted:   How many guys in Alaska are jumping into their 4-wheel drive pickups and heading for Canada today? ...
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bob melonosky

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This Week's Rejected Daily Mail Comments -- 6/23/15
Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see
each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of
crap for my blog. When you really, really need to see celebrity nipples poking through ski...
Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of crap for my blog. When you really, really need to see cel...
1
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bob melonosky

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This Week's Rejected Daily Mail Comments -- 6/8/15
Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see
each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of
crap for my blog. When you really, really need to see celebrity nipples poking through ski...
Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of crap for my blog. When you really, really need to see cel...
1
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bob melonosky

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Throwback Thursday - On a Bob Melonosky Built for Two
Part 1 My best friend growing up was a guy named Dave DeGreco.  He had long, greasy blonde hair that curled up at the bottom like Mary Tyler Moore, buck teeth, and so many beauty marks on his face that the tough kids called him "Dots." They used to hold him...
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bob melonosky

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Donal Trump Hates Mexicans and Jews. Loves Nazis. Tweet, Tweet.
Donald Trump tweeted this image yesterday of himself and a bunch of Nazis.  Turns out he hates Mexicans and Jews. Don't believe me?  Look. Donald Trump, who never takes responsibility for anything, blamed a young intern. The only thing Republicans love more...
Donald Trump tweeted this image yesterday of himself and a bunch of Nazis.  Turns out he hates Mexicans and Jews. Don't believe me?  Look. Donald Trump, who never takes responsibility for anything, blamed a young intern. Th...
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bob melonosky

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Love Wins!
Love wins! My Jesus is very happy.
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bob melonosky

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Throwback Thursday - My 6th Grade Spring Dance
That's me with Donna Santoro, my date for the Annual 6th Grade Spring Dance at Forest Park Elementary School.  How good do I look?  You can't beat a shiny plaid suit with big, gold buttons.  We're in Donna's house on Randolph Drive.  Her mom made me take of...
That's me with Donna Santoro, my date for the Annual 6th Grade Spring Dance at Forest Park Elementary School.  How good do I look?  You can't beat a shiny plaid suit with big, gold buttons.  We're in Donna's house on Randolph...
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bob melonosky

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Throwback Thursday - My First Real Job
That's me on the left at my first real job at Teapot RW, Inc. in Bethpage, Long Island. That's Ted.  He did what I did on the days I didn't go in, but with more zits. Leonid "No Tweezers" Goronovich, scariest looking electrical engineer ever. The boss, Lead...
That's me on the left at my first real job at Teapot RW, Inc. in Bethpage, Long Island. That's Ted.  He did what I did on the days I didn't go in, but with more zits. Leonid "No Tweezers" Goronovich, scariest looking elec...
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bob melonosky

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Kylie and Ivanka share their butts, Christine O'Donnell's hands are barren and I have fathered 800,000 kids.
Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of crap for my blog. When you really, really need to see cel...
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bob melonosky

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All the Kardashians That's Fit To Print
Another Post Courtesy of the The Daily Mail - I kid Rupert Murdoch a lot when we see each other at the Friar's Club but his rag does supply an endless assortment of crap for my blog. When you really, really need to see cel...
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People
In their circles
24 people
Work
Occupation
Eat, pee, shit, sleep. Repeat.
Employment
  • National Lampoon as a Contributing Writer for a couple of months until we all were replaced with videos of frat guys peeing in their pants -- but I'm not bitter.
Basic Information
Gender
Decline to State
Other names
Neil Gaiman
Story
Introduction
Melonosky. Bob Melonosky.
Bragging rights
Created UncleMelon.com, the 43,560th most popular website of the 2000s. I wrote the bit, "How to Eat Pussy," that garnered 270 million readers and 269 million happier pussies.
Education
  • No thank you.