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Olga Kostrova
2,552 followers -
Ideation | Tech & Social Innovation | Startups | Media | Spirituality | Consciousness | Philosophy | Photography | Screenwriting
Ideation | Tech & Social Innovation | Startups | Media | Spirituality | Consciousness | Philosophy | Photography | Screenwriting

2,552 followers
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"Being desirable means being comfortable with your own ambiguity. The most ambiguous reality is that we are flesh and spirit at the same time. Within everyone there is light and shadow, good and evil, love and hate. In order to be truthful, you must embrace your total being. A person who exhibits both positive and negative qualities, strengths and weaknesses is not flawed, but complete."
- Rumi

“The universe is made up of experiences that are designed to burn out your attachment, your clinging, to pleasure, to pain, to fear, to all of it. And as long as there is a place where you’re vulnerable, the universe will find a way to confront you with it. That’s the way the dance is designed. . . . And we get so that we’re perfectly willing to do whatever we do — and to do it perfectly. It’s like Mahatma Gandhi gets put in jail and they give him a lice-infested uniform and tell him to clean the latrines, and it’s a whole mess. And he walks up to the head of the guards and he says, in total truth, ‘Thank you.’ He’s not putting them on or up-levelling them. He’s saying, ‘There’s a teaching here, and I’m getting it; thank you.’ What’s bizarre is that we get to the point where somebody lays a heavy trip on us and we get caught, and then we see through our catch-ness and we say, ‘Thank you.’ We may not say it aloud because it’s too cute. But we feel ‘thank you.’ People come up and are violent or angry or write nasty letters or whatever they do to express their frustration or anger or competition, and all I can say is thanks.”
- Ram Das

ANNOUNCEMENT:

This week is my pro-bono week.
I invite everybody who are in crisis of any kind and don't have money to pay for working with a coach, therapist or facilitator - to schedule a session with me and we will work through some basics with you so you build foundation for your recovery from emotional and financial crisis.
Please note, only those who have never worked with me before and have no income are qualified for this pro-bono work.

You will not be asked for payment, you will not be asked to engage and continue the work after the session.

You will get 1 hour - this session is to bootstrap your life and get you out of the state of helplessness.

Any age, any gender, any geography is welcome.

What you must have thou - is a GENUINE desire for the change and willingness to do the work. If you sense I will have to work harder than you to convince you to get you out of the state you are in now (depression, illness, poverty in which you find comfort already) then please don't contact me, otherwise you take someone else's spot - someone who truly needs help and can do great things when they receive it.

To schedule just Skype me (ID:I deamama) and let me know what your current situation is. If I feel you are the right person to be given time to, I will... We will go from there...

With all my Love...

"At sunrise everything is luminous but not clear. It is those we live with and love and should know who elude us. You can love completely without complete understanding."
- Norman Maclean

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Highly recommended to anybody who have ever had a relationship of any kind, or want relationship of any kind (with lover, spouse, parent, child, friend...)
The video is a great demonstration of a 4 question process designed by Byron Katie.

I use some different processes and methods in my coaching & emotional healing practice but this one is a very simple process for self-inquiry that I HIGHLY RECOMMEND YOU TO TRY RIGHT IN YOUR VERY NEXT SPARE MOMENT:
(see exact process here: https://lnkd.in/egZrcMd).

And I suggest you to do it FOE EVERY RESENTFUL, JUDGMENTAL, ANGRY THOUGHT that you have about anybody...

https://lnkd.in/exs9X_8

Defense is the first act of war. There was no war before one defends himself from another who attempts to point to her / his truth in relationship. Therefore defense is an attack.
The one who constantly defends, and therefore energetically attacks, is not only not capable of listening, questioning honestly whether what's said is true, missing out on growth opportunity, but with that he destroys the very opportunity for closeness, trust, and at some point looses the relationship all together...(and usually blames another for .... - feel the blank)...
To go out (defense) is war. To go in (asking yourself "can what was said to be true?)... going in is the end of war...
Demanding from another not to speak their truth just because one's fear to hear it - that's and invitation for growing up or ending up either alone or in unauthentic, shallow, facade level relationship that while at first feel easy later are simply not fulfilling. ...

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In any form of relationship the word "respect" is often thrown as something "sacred" (more sacred that anything else)... But let's look at it together....
What is respect, actually?
Accordingly to Wikipedia, for example, "respect is a feeling of deep admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements."
Hm... so, basically if one person says to another "You don't respect me", they say "you don't express a feeling of deep admiration for me or something elicited by my abilities, qualities, or achievements."
Sounds a bit narcissistic, isn't it?
So, are we saying that friendship or love cannot be quietly enjoying one's presence and companionship, but has to be "admiration for someone or something elicited by their abilities, qualities, or achievements." What if a person doesn't have extraordinary "abilities, qualities, or achievements."? Then they can't be loved then? Sounds like nonsense, doesn't it?
Here is an article that speak to some other angles that make statement "You don't respect me" rather childish (and narcissistic is childish in many ways, immature...)

https://www.stevepavlina.com/blog/2014/06/what-is-respect/

Marriage / relationship can't sustain competition... Competition is impossible in union. If there is competition, there is no union. Competition requires a battle in which at least 1 individual ego competes with (or desperately seeks to compete with) another. Union points to Oneness. One is obviously not two. No oneness between two people, no union = no marriage.
"My way or highway", my importance, my needs, my desires, my freedom... MY, MY, MY... means "not your, not yours, not yours"... And obviously "not ours, not ours"... No, MINE!
And so, no union = no marriage of two souls for the sole purpose of closeness... Instead, it's "my" Ego in pursuit of pleasure and endless validation...
So, no union = no marriage...

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Consciousness, when it's unburdened by the body, is something that's ecstatic; we use the mind to watch the mind, and that's the meta-nature of our consciousness; we know that we know that we know, and that's such a delicious feeling, but when it's unburdened by biology and entropy, it becomes more than delicious: it becomes magical.

- Jason Silva
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