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Steve Burgess
184 followers -
Not allowed to eat tomatoes if more that 30 minutes away from the house.
Not allowed to eat tomatoes if more that 30 minutes away from the house.

184 followers
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The Federal Aviation Administration on Monday unveiled a new rule requiring current drone owners to register their unmanned aircraft by Feb. 19, 2016.   When asked to comment, an NRA representative said, "Great idea, those things are dangerous if they fall into the hands of someone irresponsible."

British students have invented a condom that changes color when it comes into contact with sexually transmitted diseases.  The invention would be perfect to help cut down on STDs if they could warn people five minutes sooner by inventing underwear that changed color.  

Millennials are upset and telling Hillary Clinton that if she wants to inspire them, she should pay her interns and get them off of unemployment.  Hillary said she'd be willing to settle for something short of 'inspiration' if 'willing participation' was enough to get some front yard signs installed.

The first major lead into the whereabouts of escaped murderers Richard Matt and David Sweat came with the discovery of prison-issue underwear in a remote hunting cabin in upstate New York. The mothers of the two escapees issues a joint statement announcing that they were pleased with the boys for packing clean underwear for their trip.

Following the recent events in South Carolina, Walmart, Amazon and eBay quickly proclaimed that confederate themed goods would be pulled from their stock. Sears attempted to join with in the other major retailers, but unfortunately, it wasn't 1990 and they were forced to sit in the room and wait to announce with JoAnn Fabrics.

Following the recent events in South Carolina, Walmart, Amazon and eBay quickly proclaimed that confederate themed goods would be pulled from their stock. Sears attempted to join with in the other major retailers, but unfortunately, it wasn't 1990 and they were forced to sit in the room and wait to announce with JoAnn Fabrics.

KFC says tests of a viral photo of an oddly-shaped fried chicken tender was 'a hoax.' Sadly, the analysis was actually a comparative taste test at a local Korean restaurant, confirming it wasn't actually a rat.

Passengers aboard a United Airlines flight from Rome to Chicago finally reached their destination late Sunday after a 30-hour delay due to a disgruntled passenger.  Upon arriving in Chicago, the unruly passenger apologized, saying he mistakenly thought the plane was being diverted to Cleveland, explaining his reaction.

In a Bleacher Report interview, NY Knicks President Phil Jackson criticized the individualistic style of play of LeBron James. Jackson indicated that he longs for the days when non-athletic guys could get together in an empty gym and pass a basketball around while wearing testicle choking shorts.

Warner Brothers executives are concerned about the creative differences on the upcoming Captain Sully film since the team can't agree on who will play the co-pilot. Star Tom Hanks wants the role to be played by a half-inflated volleyball, but director Clint Eastwood thinks it is a great idea is to have Hanks spend the entire film talking to an empty chair.
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