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Paul Wiedel
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Open Source North is looking for presentations. If you'd like to be a presenter in the first Open Source North conference, please send a description of your presentation to: info@opensourcenorth.com

http://opensourcenorth.com/
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In case you were wondering, it is unwise to open a '67 Corvette's radiator after driving and revving it hard. 

In case you were also wondering, it is equally unwise to drive your car yourself with 2nd and 3rd degree burns on your forearm to a clinic for help. BTW, they were closed.

In case you were still wondering, my neighbor makes some really bad decisions.
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I usually try to waste as much of scumbag telemarketer's time as I can. I like the way this guy thinks.
I try to be kind and polite to telemarketers who are just doing a job.
Today is a good day. I just had a call from a telemarketer. Did I yell and scream at them, you ask? Certainly not. Like a good IT administrator I put my skills to use for their benefit. Here's how the conversation went:

Computer: "Press 9 to not be contacted in the future. Press 4 to speak to someone about your mortgage issues"
<presses 4>
TM: "Hello, are you having problems paying your mortgage?"
Me: "Hi, this is the IT department. We intercepted your call as we detected a problem with you phone and need to fix it."
TM: "Oh... ok, well what do we need to do?"
Me: "We're going to need to fix the settings by pressing 4-6-8 and * at the same time"
TM: "Ok, nothing happened."
<alright, so he's not using a Polycom>
Me: "Are you using the new Polycom phones that we deployed?"
TM: "No, it's a Yealink"
Me: "Ok, I see. You haven't had the new Polycom phone deployed to your desk yet. Let me check our technical documentations for the Yealink."
<did a quick Google search, "yealink phone factory reset">
Me: "Alright, do you see an "OK" button on your phone?"
TM: "Yes I do"
Me: "Alright, you're going to press and hold that button for 10 seconds."
TM: "OK, pressing it now"
Me: "Perfect, let me know if you get a password request"
TM: "OK, nothing has popped up ye----"
<click>

That's right. I made a telemarketer unwittingly factory reset his phone which means he will be unable to make anymore calls until someone is able to reconfigure his phone and that will take at least an hour or longer if they can't do it right away!
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Good luck on Monday Elinor. 
Elinor Scott could not finish the 2013 Boston Marathon because of the terror attack. Her hopes to walk to the hallowed Boston finish line this year are in jeopardy because of devastation on a personal scale: pancreatic cancer. http://strib.mn/1hHsmUG
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The risks of viral and bacterial infection are tremendous these days. To prevent the risk of infection health care professionals are discouraging touching one's eyes and nose. This just makes good hygienic sense.

Good hygiene creates a conflict with one's desire to 'dig for gold' in their nasal mine. Sure, one could use latex or another suitable prophylaxis to slake the desire. However, health care professionals will tell you that these measures are not 100% effective and they still carry the risk of infection and/or allergic complications.

Hear me now and believe me later, it is not worth the risk! There is a better way.

Nose Picker is specifically designed to alleviate the cravings and grant all of the rewards without carrying the risks associated with modern physical nose picking.

As a health conscious person you owe it to yourself and the community to start virtually picking your nose with Nose Picker today.
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I liken it to Jenga, but I've definitely felt this way.
If you have done code refactoring or code review, you will understand.


#codecomedy   #programmer   #joke   #webdevelopment  
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We have more than a year of data on the Leaf. 

Here are some numbers that I find interesting. The average mileage is 4.3 miles per kWH. For $4.00 in electricity at $0.075/kWH the car will travel 230 miles. 

We've traveled almost 9000 miles this calendar year. We have never reached turtle mode, but we did get it close once a few miles from the house.

If we were to use a gasoline vehicle that gets 30 mpg with a gas price of $3.23 it would have cost $969 to drive the 9000 miles.

At $.075 per kWH it cost us $150.48 to drive 9000 miles.
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A colleague shared a picture of his son's car getting toilet papered. It reminded me of the one time my house got TP'd.

My high school chums and I were never happy with just doing the minimum. Instead of throwing a few rolls of toilet paper around someone's yard we thought it would be fun to leave a few House For Sale signs in their yard. I'm sure the poor neighbors who were trying to sell their houses did not appreciate the gesture.

I was fortunate enough to get TP'd before someone thought of employing Aunt Jemima as part of the TP ritual. The storm door syruping wasn't a favorite.

When my house was TP'd my friends were considerate enough to remember the for sale signs.  I think there were about 11 of them in the front yard. I remember this specifically because my dad woke me up the morning after and told me I had to get rid of the signs right away. The reason for the urgency was because the local realtor, John Greene, was picking him up to go to a meeting. I think about half the signs were from John's company.

I took care of the signs. By the time I was trying to fish the toilet paper out of the pine trees John Greene arrived. I remember John had a pretty good laugh when he drove into the driveway. I had a pretty good laugh that he had a pretty good laugh. Good times.
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