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Geoffrey Saunders
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FRIENDS, ROMANS, CONTRYMEN. LEND ME YOUR EARS….. Never thought I would ever use that. Anyway, it has come to my attention that I am getting a little, slight, infinitesimal amount, micro amount, older. O the pain of saying that. So, I have learned that my body wakes up in stages. I know you asking yourself, “What is he talking about?”, or “There goes Geoff just being crazy again”, but let me walk you through this and see if this applies to you. Now for everyone the order of these things may be different for you, except maybe the last one, and you will understand.
1. Your brain wakes up slowly to the realization that it is morning. Now there will be an internal fight where the two sides of your brain, asleep and awake, argue with each other. One side says it’s morning, the one slaps the other because there is no way it can be morning, you just fell asleep.
2. Then your ears wake up. This doesn’t matter unless you have a small child, and when I say small I mean anyone under the age of 5 who can’t go fend for themselves for JUST A FEW MINUTES, so you can fully wake up. An alarm clock that you would like to either smash with a rock or throw across the room because it would end the fight mentioned in number 1. Or a dog that is prone to peeing on the floor if you don’t hear it whine….once.
3. Your nose wakes up. WHAT IS THAT SMELL? It is either the child that you know can’t wake up and fend for themselves and is trying to cook ‘Just like mommy’, fresh coffee that someone, anyone, makes to help you wake up, that dog that has decided that you must not care if it has to go pee and has decided to fend for itself, or of course bacon. If it is bacon, or like it is affectionately called ‘meat candy’, skip everything else and just go get the bacon already. If there isn’t, for some insane reason any bacon cooking, proceed to number 4.
4. Then your arms wake up. Again completely useless, unless you are ready to end the fight mentioned in number 1 by dealing with that stupid clock (see clock mentioned in 2), push away the dog that has given you another warning by licking your feet, hands, face…..you get the picture, or used the international sign for your kid to be quiet for those last precious minutes.
5. The top half of your body wakes up. Why only the top half you ask? Because the only thing that it allows you to do, is painfully roll over and regret sleeping in that position. What are you doing, you think you’re young enough to sleep like that?
6. Legs are next, which allows you to wake up and take care of things. You can go to the bathroom, feed the kids, let the dog out, drink the coffee, eat the ‘meat candy’, and find the clock you previously destroyed. What ends up happening though is you stumble towards the bathroom kicking the dresser on the way, tripping over shoes (who left their shoes in the middle of the floor?), stepping on a Lego (there hasn’t been legos in this house for years), and stepping in the wet spot left by, you guessed it, mans best friend who has now become enemy number one. What would have happened to make your trip so perilous this morning. Number seven is….
7. Your eyes snap open. Where you immediately see that you should have left for work half an hour ago. Good morning.

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Use my link to get $5 for signing into the Amazon App the first time: http://amazon.com/mrp?refcust=TORRI3678N&ref_=mrp_10005_shr_ss

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Non-Ingress NOLA.
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11/16/16
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I will have a new grandaughter soon. Can't wait.
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Just a short ride in the Tardis. 
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Aegis Nova 2016 #aegisnova

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O yes. I did it again.
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6/20/16
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