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Mustabation! The three musts... You must, is simply not true and can be unhealthy...

1. I must do well and win the approval of others for my performances or else I am no good.
2. Other people must treat me considerately, fairly and kindly, and in exactly the way I want them to treat me. If they don't, they are no good and they deserve to be condemned and punished.
3. I must get what I want, when I want it; and I must not get what I don't want. It's terrible if I don't get what I want, and I can't stand it. Arrrrgh lmao

The first belief often leads to anxiety, depression, shame, and guilt. The second belief often leads to rage, passive-aggression and acts of violence. The third belief often leads to self-pity and procrastination. It is the demanding nature of the beliefs that causes the problem.

Less demanding, more flexible beliefs lead to healthy emotions and helpful behaviours...
REBT! Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy.... :O)
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Stephen Barrett's profile photo
5 comments
 
If one thinks that failing makes one a complete failure, this is an illogical jump, because a complete failure would have to fail at everything and one surely does not do that. A complete failure would also be doomed to fail in the future which cannot be proven.
 
Anger is an emotion. Emotions do not exist in a vacuum and they are not sacred. Emotions arise from our perceptions and what we tell ourselves those perceptions mean. In other words, our emotions are the results of our thoughts and beliefs. If we tell ourselves rational, reality based stuff, we get healthy emotions. If we tell ourselves bull shit, we get exaggerated, unhealthy emotions.
Frustration means not getting what you want and leads to feeling frustrated. Frustration + the absurd demand: "I SHOULDN'T be frustrated, how DARE the universe not give what I want when I fucking want it!" is what leads to anger. The fear in this case is the fear of not getting what you want or having it taken away from you.... REBT
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