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Tracy O.
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11 followers
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Tracy O.'s posts

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The day I yelled at my mom.
When I was a kid, my sister and I were never allowed to talk-back to our parents, let alone raise our voices at them.  And, to be quite honest, I can't remember ever breaking that rule, until the evening of September 11th, 2011. Catelyn's dad and I had watc...

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A lovely goodbye
"Should I wear my new lace turquoise dress, or does it look too cheerful?" I questioned as I readied for Audrey's celebration of life this morning. I settled on a black and white polka-dot dress and scurried out the door. Heaven forbid I be late. Thirty min...

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I'm at a loss
Catelyn was born on December 30, 2009.  She unexpectedly died on September 11, 2011.  She was 20 months old.  It was the worst day in my life, thus far.  I never envisioned anything could come close to matching the pain I felt that day. And then, two days a...

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December.
I am definitely struggling right now.  I feel like I am failing Catelyn's legacy.  Her fifth birthday is in about three weeks, and I haven't done anything to recognize it. Ideally, I wanted to do something thoughtful and amazing for other children, such as ...

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Random acts of Catelyn
Catelyn's third angelversary is 3 days away.  I posted a Facebook event in her memory on August 11th, asking that people consider doing something nice for another person and thinking of Catelyn as they did so. The response has been overwhelming.  Strangers,...

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**
In her short life, Catelyn was a budding artist. She had a star-shaped magnetic drawing toy, the kind with an attached stylus and a sliding bar that erased scribblings.  It was made for children ages 3 and up, but she rarely put items she shouldn't ingest i...

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Easter 2014
Happy Easter.  Today was a bit tough.  It was hard not being able to spend Easter with Catelyn's dad's side of the family.  Though I had several invites of people to spend time with, I chose to go through it alone. I feel like Catelyn knew i was a little gl...

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looking for planks
There is a huge disconnect between the way I see myself, and the way others do.  I don't know how to begin to incorporate 'reality' with my own very skewed perceptions of myself.  Sadly, according to my thoughts, I have no value to offer this world.  I have...

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keep chipping away
According to my login page, my last published entry was submitted on December 16th, 2013.  A lot has changed for me since then. Christmas came, Catelyn's fourth birthday came, the new year began, and somewhere in there I found out my marriage was over. I ha...

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Reality crept in
It's almost always the unexpected... On Sunday, my husband and I went to get groceries, which seems like a relatively harmless, maybe even 'safe' outing. We had planned to leave early in the morning, but I wanted
to take care of a couple of things, and thu...
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