Profile cover photo
Profile photo
Moments of Clarity, LLC
2 followers
2 followers
About
Posts

Post has attachment
Photo
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
A very important reminder!
Photo
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
12 Days of Healthy Boundary Habits
Day 12 – Saying no AND yes 

Most people think of others as having healthy limits when they are able to stay no to others.  But it’s not all about that!  Having loving limits is as much about saying yes to healthy and happy as saying no to harmful and negative.  It is true that the majority of people have boundaries that are too close.  They have to start by putting distance between themselves and the people, places, or things that are not working for them.  But in doing this, it is equally as important to bring the positive closer.  There are also people that have boundaries that are too far away.  In these circumstances, saying “yes” is an important place to start when implementing new boundaries.

Signs you may have boundaries that are too far away: 
• It is difficult for people to get to know you
• You have  little or no hobbies or interests 
• You end relationships when other people start to get too close
• Your thoughts, finances, and energy are focused constantly on one person (codependency)

If you are interested in learning more about how to have Loving Limits, go to my website www.momentsofclarityllc.com for more information about 1:1 coaching options.  You can also email me at livinglovinglimits@gmail.com with any questions.  
Photo
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
12 Days of Healthy Boundary Habits
Day 11 – Appropriate and reasonable expectations 

One of my favorite quotes is, “Expectations are resentments waiting to happen.”  When you have loving limits, you know how to gauge yourself and others and set expectations for the situation at hand.  You are aware that if your expectations are too high, the boundary will never work.  The opposite is also true: if your expectations are too low, you will easily be taken advantage of.  It is also important to note that expectations can change depending on the person and/or the situation.  

Signs that you need more realistic expectations: 
• You anticipate perfection from yourself in everything you do
• If you don’t complete a goal or task immediately and effortlessly, you give up completely
• You end relationships quickly when they don’t go as you planned
• You often feel disappointed by or angry with others
• You give more to relationships than you receive in return

If you are interested in learning more about how to have Loving Limits, go to my website www.momentsofclarityllc.com for more information about 1:1 coaching options.  You can also email me at livinglovinglimits@gmail.com with any questions.  
Photo
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
12 Days of Healthy Boundary Habits
Day 10 – Inward approval

When you have healthy limits, you rely on your gut instinct, your own thoughts and feelings, and your own personal values to make decisions or goals for your life.  You may decide to seek help or feedback from your support system (day 9), but this is never with an agenda of someone else telling you what to do or finding someone else to base your decision on.  With this comes responsibility for the success or the failure.  There is never another person to blame or to take credit for the outcome. 

Signs you are seeking outward approval:
• Making decisions with the goal of making others happy
• Not being able to make up your mind
• Looking to others for your happiness
• Feeling as if it is hard to know what you think or how you feel

If you are interested in learning more about how to have Loving Limits, go to my website www.momentsofclarityllc.com for more information about 1:1 coaching options.  You can also email me at livinglovinglimits@gmail.com with any questions.  
Photo
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
12 Days of Healthy Boundary Habits
Day 9 – Healthy network/support system

When you have healthy limits, you attract other people who have or want the same.  These are supportive relationships with no agenda.  No one is looking to take care of or be taken care of.  People with healthy boundaries also have a positive support systems in the form of mentors, coaches, therapists, etc.  Because you are always growing, you choose to surround yourself with people who support your growth and are on their own journeys of growth.  

Signs you need a healthy support system:
• There is no one in your life that you look up to or would want to be like in some way
• Having people in your life who tell you that you can’t accomplish your dreams, they are unrealistic, you don’t deserve them, etc.
• Other people in your life rely on you for their happiness
• Feeling alone and not having someone to turn to for encouragement
• Having a passion for something but feeling stuck because you don’t have someone to encourage or support you toward making your dream a reality

If you are interested in learning more about how to have Loving Limits, go to my website www.momentsofclarityllc.com for more information about 1:1 coaching options.  You can also email me at livinglovinglimits@gmail.com with any questions.  
Photo
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
12 Days of Healthy Boundary Habits
Day 8 – Assertive communication 

When there is a need to set verbal boundaries with other people, assertive communication is the most important element.  If you are passive, it is likely you will either not set the boundary at all, or you will take it back after setting it.  If you are aggressive, other people will become defensive and this will often lead to confrontation.  If you are passive-aggressive, other people will often know that you are upset, but not know what you need or what you want from them that would help.  When you are assertive, you are able to voice your feelings, thoughts, needs, etc. while also being respectful of the other person.  Keep in mind that it is just as important to continue assertive communication throughout a conversation or situation as it is to begin it assertively.   

Signs you have poor communication
• Not telling people what you think, how you feel, etc.
• Hinting to others about what you need
• Forcing your hand in situations in order to get what you want
• Having numerous confrontational relationships
• Difficulty asking for what you want or need

If you are interested in learning more about how to have Loving Limits, go to my website www.momentsofclarityllc.com for more information about 1:1 coaching options.  You can also email me at livinglovinglimits@gmail.com with any questions.  
Photo
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
12 Days of Healthy Boundary Habits
Day 7 – Unspoken boundaries 

When you combine healthy boundaries with integrity (day 6), people know what to expect from you and know what lines not to cross.  Because of this, boundaries become expected.  This is important to remember when beginning the process of working on your own limits.  It feels daunting at the beginning, like you have to plan every communication.  But it will not always be that way!  It will become an automatic for you as well as other people in your life.  

Signs you need to practice consistency with boundaries: 
• Setting a limit but not following through with it
• Setting boundaries with others that you do not display yourself
• Allowing an unhealthy behavior from one person, but not others

If you are interested in learning more about how to have Loving Limits, go to my website www.momentsofclarityllc.com for more information about 1:1 coaching options.  You can also email me at livinglovinglimits@gmail.com with any questions.  
Photo
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
12 Days of Healthy Boundary Habits
Day 6 – Integrity 

C.S. Lewis defines integrity as doing the right thing, even when no one is around to see it or praise you for it.  When you have healthy limits, you are a great example of this.  Not only can you can be counted on, but others know what to expect from you.  You don’t waiver depending on who’s around, don’t beat around the bush, and don’t constantly change your mind.  You are where you say you will be, when you say you will be there, doing what you say you will do.  

Signs you are out of integrity:
• Looking to others to determine how you feel, what you think, etc.
• Not being dependable or reliable 
• Passive-aggressive communication (will talk more about this on Day 8)
• Allowing other things to get in the way of commitments you have made
• Changing how you act, talk, etc. based on who is around at the time

If you are interested in learning more about how to have Loving Limits, go to my website www.momentsofclarityllc.com for more information about 1:1 coaching options.  You can also email me at livinglovinglimits@gmail.com with any questions.  
Photo
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
12 Days of Healthy Boundary Habits
Day 5 – Self-love

You are the biggest example to others of how to treat you.  If you are constantly putting yourself down, you will attract others who will believe it and continue it.  If you have respect for yourself, others will believe it and continue it.  And when it comes to setting boundaries, you need to have self-love, or you will convince yourself that you don’t deserve to set limits with others because you aren’t ___ (fill in the blank) enough.  

Signs you need to work on self-love:
• Constantly putting yourself down (internally or out loud)
• People pleasing and codependency
• Giving too much of yourself in order to prove you are worthy of love
• Constantly seeking validation from others
• Feeling you are never enough

If you are interested in learning more about how to have Loving Limits, go to my website www.momentsofclarityllc.com for more information about 1:1 coaching options.  You can also email me at livinglovinglimits@gmail.com with any questions.  
Photo
Add a comment...
Wait while more posts are being loaded