Mum gave me heartaches and a life full of poses.
Daddy put me together and held me upright,
Mum tread me down and kept me out of sight.
Daddy was proud and often very loud,
Mum was very naughty and often brought me.
Daddy took me places and showed me the world,
Mum only took from me and shook me around.
Daddy is my rock,
Mum is the soil,
I am from a divorce that survived the turmoil.
- Washington UniversityPsychologyReproductive Medicine and Law Workshop, American Society of Reproductive Medicine Annual Meeting, Washington, DC, October 2007. “Valuing All Families: Law Reform for the 21st Century,” International Society of Family law North America Regional Conference, Vancouver, Canada, June 2007. Joint plenary session of the Association of American Law Schools Workshop on Family Law and AALS/American Society of Reproductive Medicine Workshop on Reproductive Medicine and the Law, Vancouver, Canada, June 2007. “Obtaining Public and Health Benefits for Nonmarital Families,” (Un)married…with Children: Examining Legal Constraints and Social Judgments, Symposium of the Journal of Gender, Social Policy and the Law, American University Washington College of law, Washington, DC, February 2007. “Marriage, Civil Unions, Domestic Partnerships and Other Family Structures in a Mobile “Valuing All Families: What is a Comprehensive LGBT Family Policy and Which American “Lawrence, Goodridge and Beyond: The End of Marriage As We Know It?” AALS Annual Meeting, Section Program for the Juvenile and Family Law Section, San Francisco, CA, January 2005. “Eliminating Marriage’s ‘Special Rights’,” Women’s Rights Law Reporter Symposium 2004, Rutgers University School of Law–Newark, April 1, 2004. “Ending Marriage as We Know It: Does the Movement for Same-Sex Marriage Divert Attention from a More Just Reform of the Law of Families?”, 2004 Family Law Distinguished Scholar Lecture, University of Wisconsin Law School, March 25, 2004. “Why the ALI Domestic Partners Principles Get it Right,” AALS Annual Meeting, Section Program for the Property Law Section, Atlanta, Georgia, January 2004. “Questioning Ourselves: The Pros and Cons of Marriage and Domestic Partnership Registration,” George Washington University, November, 2003. “Making Marriage Matter Less: The ALI Domestic Partners Principles are a Step in the Right Direction,” University of Chicago Law School, October 2003. “Ending Marriage as We Know It,” International Society of Family Law North American Regional Conference, University of Oregon School of Law, Eugene, Oregon, June, 2003. “Lessons Beyond U.S. Borders,” Symposium on Marriage, Democracy, and Families, Hofstra 8 Law School, March, 2003. “Values Underlying Adoption Criteria,” Symposium on Marriage, Adoption and the Best Interests of the Child, Capital University Law School, Columbus, Ohio, November, 2002. Rethinking Debates over Research, Practice and Policy, Fourth Annual Conference of the Council on Contemporary Families, Fordham University, New York, 2001. “Recognizing Parents but not Partners; Recognizing Partners but not Parents: A Comparison between Europe and the United States,” New York Law School, 2000 and International Society of Family Law 10th World Conference, Brisbane, Australia, 2000. “The Impact of Troxel v. Granville ” Who Gets the Children? Parental Rights After Troxel v. Granville, Rutgers Camden Law School, 2000. "Adoptions by Unmarried Couples," Program of the Family Law Section of the District of Columbia Bar, Washington, D.C., 1995. "Advocacy Scholarship", Clients and Community in Legal Practice and Education, American University Washington College of Law, Washington, D.C., 1994. "When is a Father not a Father and Other Riddles", Feminism and Legal Theory Workshop: Parents and Children: Evolving Issues in Reproductive Rights and Relationships", Columbia Law School, 1994. "Am I My Client?: The Role Confusion of a Lawyer-Activist", Mid-Atlantic Clinical Theory Workshop, University of Baltimore Law School, 1992. My Client? The Role Confusion of a Lawyer Activist", Lavender Law III: The Third National Conference, Chicago, 1992. "Am I My Client?: The Role Confusion of a Lawyer-Activist", Theoretics of Practice 11 Conference, Hastings Law School, 1992 and Critical Networks Conference, Northeastern Law School, 1992. "Alternative Families", Association of American Law Schools Annual Meeting, Washington, D.C., 1991. "Expanding the Concept of the American Family," American Bar Association Annual Meeting, Chicago, Illinois, 1990. "Critical Clinics", Critical Legal Studies National Conference, American University Washington College of Law, 1988. "The Lawyer's Role in Civil Disobedience: Advocate or Participant?", Northeastern University School of Law, Boston, Massachusetts, 1988. "Custody Preferences: The Politics of Parenting", Association of American Law Schools Annual Meeting, Los Angeles, California, 1987. "Child Custody Determinations: In Whose Interests?: An Historical and Contemporary Examination", Clara Brett Martin Lecture, University of Toronto Law School, 1986. "Civil Rights After Hardwick: Are There Any?", George Washington University National Law Center, Washington, D.C., 1986. "Trends in Custody Determination--An Historical and Contemporary Overview", Conference on Child Custody: The American Family in Conflict, University of Baltimore Law School, Baltimore, Maryland, 1986. "Child Support Guidelines: A Critique of the Economic Analysis of Parental Expenditures on Children", Women's Legal Defense Fund Conference on Child Support Guidelines, Queenstown, Maryland, 1986. "Alternative Families and Other Innovations in Life and Law", University of Chicago Law School, 1986. "Equality and Family Law Reform", National Lawyers Guild Annual Conference, Denver, Colorado, 1986. "Trends in Family Law: The Impact on Women", Northwest Women's Law Center Conference on Family Law, Seattle, Washington, 1986. "Non-AFDC Clients in the IV-D System", American Bar Association Conference on Child Support, Long Beach, California, 1986. SELECTED MEMBERSHIPS AND ACTIVITIES Bar: District of Columbia, Maryland, United States Supreme Court Executive Committee Member, Association of American Law Schools Section Faculty, Child Custody Training, D.C. Bar Public Service Activities Corporation Pro Bono Training Program, 1991 to 1993. District of Columbia Superior Court Child Support Guidelines Committee, appointed by Chief Judge H. Carl Moultrie, 1985 to 1990. Steering Committee, Family Law Section, District of Columbia Bar, 1986 to 1988. Legal Coordinator, Nonviolent Civil Disobedience at United States Supreme Court
Raise your right hand and read aloud the following:
~ I promise that I will not in any way put my children in the middle... of any dispute I may have with their mother/father, and that I will put my children’s best interest above everything else.
~ I will not make disparaging comments to them about their mother/father, use my children as pawns or leverage, or try to turn my children against their mother/father, no matter how angry I may be.
~ I will focus on enjoying and making the most out of the time I have with my children, and will encourage my children to have a good relationship with their mother/father.
~ I will keep in mind that my children are innocent bystanders in this process, and it is up to both of us to protect them.
~ I will remember that my overall goal is to raise happy, well adjusted children who have a healthy relationship with both parents.
Dedicated to the proposition that children are best served by having unfettered EQUAL access to BOTH parents and to the proposition that fathers are indispensable.
"An excellent group of forward-thinking, family oriented minds!" ~ Rita
Fathers have become undervalued, family structure has become disposable, children suffer without both parents but so often father is left out, seen as nonessential. Let's correct this by bringing attention to it! I am happy to populate the Internet with information that is helpful, supportive, and conducive to fostering father-child relationships, reducing or eliminating Parental Alienation, for the betterment of our children's psychological and emotional health, and for the future health of our families and societies.
As the American Declaration of Independence clearly states, when in the course of human events it becomes necessary for people to band together and collectively declare their rights and responsibilities to which the laws of nature and nature’s God entitle and bind them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should disclose the causes which impel them to such.
Therefore let us declare that we still hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal and are endowed by our creator with certain inalienable rights; that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. But with those rights come responsibilities.
In order to continually experience life, liberty and happiness as promised, nature’s God demands obedience to His law to protect those rights. This is where we have fallen short and therefore, in order not to lose the blessings of freedom, the people of the world must turn from the sole focus on rights, and recognize the inherent and required responsibilities that we have.
Among the responsibilities to which we must adhere to maintain our God given rights are HONOR, COURAGE and VIGILANCE.
Over time, we believe that these basic human responsibilities have been trampled, and replaced with degradation, fear and apathy.
But when a long train of abuses of the people and conscience by the media and by other segments of society, pursuing the same path of reducing them to ridicule, scorn and even sub-human status, it is their right, it is their DUTY, to peacefully, but vehemently take a stand.
Men want to be king, and the more we concentrate on our rights and the more we are told not to worry about our responsibilities, the more we lose our rights.
Just as physics show, for every action there’s an equal and opposite reaction. The time has come to declare that at least for the western world human rights are generally accepted and moving in the right direction however a new movement is required a movement of human responsibility.
The media, politicians and large institutions both academic and political have been lying to us, and we must demand the truth be told. With that demand, comes the responsibility that we tell the truth first, in ourselves. Too many of us delegate our responsibility to the media…and too many believe there is no personal responsibility at all.
Political correctness has polluted our language and clouds our every discussion. What was once accepted as good and right, is now considered bad and evil, and that which was bad and evil is now presented to the world as good and decent.
Opposing thoughts or opinions are referred to as crazy, insane, non-factual and utterly without merit. Furthermore, we are told, they should not even be heard. Now, the time has come to take a stand by exhibiting the traits – honor, courage and vigilance.
What is HONOR?
~It is being honest in all of our dealings. It is showing loyalty and fairness, and being a beacon of integrity in all our beliefs and actions. It is showing respect for others.
COURAGE is the ability to face danger, criticism or scorn – not without fear, but while overcoming fear to deal with that which comes our way.
When no one else in the Kingdom wanted to face the mighty giant, Goliath, young David was willing. David must have felt fear at the sight of his foe, but overcame it, and courageously vanquished his enemy.
VIGILANCE is being watchful for all forms of treachery and tyranny, lies and deceit. The person in the watchtower, waiting all night, suddenly sounding the alarm that the enemy is coming. The careful observer of the markets and economies who proclaims to the world, all is not well, there is trouble ahead and the outspoken critic of the powerful, going against societies’ grain, warning that all is not as we’re being told. These are the vigilant.
We implore all people to stand with these characteristics – HONOR, COURAGE and VIGILANCE.
To that end, we must restore HONOR in our own lives. Seek after the truth. Declare right now, that no longer will we simply accept what is told us by the media or anyone else.
We must be VIGILANT. We must think the unthinkable. The holocaust occurred because no one could imagine it, but evil never sleeps, and neither must we. As Edmund Burke said, “all that is necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.” We must DO something. Stand watch. Speak up. Become involved.
Thus, we the people do hereby declare not only our rights, but do now establish this bill of responsibilities.
1. Because I have the right to choose, I recognize that I am accountable to God and have the responsibility to keep the 10 commandments in my own life.
2. Because I have the right to worship as I choose, I have the responsibility to honor the right of others to worship as they see fit.
3. Because I have freedom of speech, I have the responsibility to defend the speech of others, even if I strongly disagree with what they’re saying.
4. Because I have the right to pursue happiness, I have the responsibility to show humility and express gratitude for all the blessings I enjoy and the rights I’ve been given.
5. Because I have the right to honest and good government I will seek out honest and just representatives when possible. If I cannot find one then I accept the responsibility to take that place.
6. Because I have the God given right to liberty, I have the personal responsibility to have the courage to defend others to be secure in their persons, lives and property.
7. Because I have the right to equal justice, I will stand for those who are wrongly accused or unjustly blamed.
8. Because I have the right to knowledge, I will be accountable for myself and my children’s education…to live our lives in such a way that insures the continuation of truth.
9. Because I have the right to pursue my dreams and keep the fruits of my labor, I have the responsibility to feed, protect and shelter my family, the less fortunate, the fatherless, the old and infirm.
10. Because I have a right to the truth, I will not bear false witness nor will I stand idly by as others do.
Unconditionally, while maintaining my responsibility to compassionately yet fiercely stand against those things that decay the natural rights of all men. And for the support of this declaration, and with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence we mutually pledge to each other our lives, fortunes and sacred honor.
Family Court Values ~
The real problem in family court lies in a societal lack of family values of marriage, commitment, and respect for moral values. This percolates upward through the legislatures in all 50 states to create laws which devalue what a father and a mother in combination can do to create and mold a new generation of children and Americans
Improve the lives of children and strengthen society by protecting the child’s right to the love and care of both parents after separation or divorce. We seek better lives for children through family court reform!!
Activist sometimes exhibit impatience with theory - often for good reasons. They have seen nonviolence caught in an idealogical net in which the purity of idealogy eclipsed activity and the nonviolent effort was undermined by a deflection of energy. But nonviolent theory is absolutely necessary. It introduces to the world a new strategy for resisting evil without creating new evils and becoming evil ourselves. But more important, it articulates a new way of being that yields a vision of peace more powerful than all the armies of all the nations of the world. (Peace is the Way, 2000)
The Sixth Amendment to the U.S. Constitution has been interpreted to provide EVERY AMERICAN with the CONSTITUTIONAL right to self-representation, if they so choose. That privilege, like all other constitutional rights, should be enjoyed without fear of harassment, prejudice, or abuse. Furthermore, no law, regulation, or policy should exist to abridge or surreptitiously extinguish that right.
Self-Represented Litigants have no less of a right to FAIR and MEANINGFUL due process under the federal and state constitutions as those individuals who choose to utilize an attorney for their legal affairs and issues. In fact, NOWHERE in any state or federal constitution does it specify that the hiring of a lawyer is a prerequisite to exercising one's due process rights. Democratic principles dictate that we have the right to freely choose between self-representation and hiring a lawyer to handle our legal matters without suffering humiliation, prejudice, or penalization. After all, it is the parties to the litigation that ultimately have to deal with the consequences of the case's outcome, and not the judge or the lawyers involved in the matter.
Contrary to the view of certain judges and lawyers, those who opt to litigate their own legal matters without an attorney are NOT second-class citizens deserving of contempt and injustice. Instead, they are BRAVE CITIZENS with an inalienable right to have their legal causes adjudicated objectively and justly -- with or without a lawyer. Self-representation can be a difficult, time-consuming, and often frightening experience, especially for those burdened by demanding work schedules, family responsibilities, and other obligations of day-to-day living. Accordingly, those who engage in the difficult task of self-litigation should be REVERED for their COURAGE and DEDICATION, not scorned or abused.
We also need to amass momentous opposition against those persons, agencies, and institutions who, in the interest of protecting huge profits, careers, and prestige, subject self-litigants to a hostile and often abusive litigation atmosphere calculated to suppress self-representation and force people to become completely and financially dependent on lawyers to gain "paid" access to a taxpayer-funded legal system.
WE SUPPORT PEOPLE UNITED FOR LEGAL SYSTEM EQUALITY (P.U.L.S.E.) ~ PULSE’s mission is to protect the People's right to self-representation, protest undue prejudice and abuse against self-litigants, and advocate for fair and meaningful reforms that will foster equitable treatment for the self-represented. We seek to accomplish this agenda through grassroots mobilization, community awareness and education, policy reform, and peaceful public demonstrations.
For PULSE to be effective, an active network of like-minded, vocal, influential, financially generous, and politically expressive supporters and activists from every state in the Nation must be created.
There are three issues that they constantly talk about as evidence of reverse discrimination against men.
- Divorce alimony issues: Women are more likely to be believed in divorce court than men.
- Custody issues: Women are more likely to get custody, despite the fact that men are excellent fathers.
- Men have to register for the draft. Women can volunteer. Despite the fact that it’s an all-volunteer army, they still argue that there’s discrimination against men in the military.
Those are the big three. There are some who argue there is literally a titanic [amount] of funding for breast cancer research, but there’s absolutely none for prostate research — that women control the health industry as well. I don’t think that gets as much traction because it’s so easily confounded by the numbers. But custody, divorce and military are the places they tend to go the most.
Father’s rights groups focus entirely on divorce and custody. And, they claim, rightly, that as parents they have rights. They claim that men are discriminated against in custody decisions — that women can file a false charge of domestic violence and get custody forever and prevent the father from seeing their children. That’s largely where they focus their attention.
We think the men’s rights groups would embrace the father’s rights groups more readily than the father’s rights groups would embrace the men’s rights groups. The father’s rights groups are very focused on one particular policy and they don’t have this long litany of grievances. And I think they sometimes feel uncomfortable with how far the men’s rights guys go.
The father’s rights guys — at least some of them — they are in pain, because they really did feel like they were good fathers, and they’ve lost contact with their kids and lost custody. And some of them are hurting. I’m a Jeffersonian, sort of instinctively. And to Jefferson, democracy was based not just on rights, but also on responsibility. It was a delicate balance between the two. I love the fact that in minority communities, what you hear is not about the father’s rights movement, but father responsibility movement. To me it’s a balance. Fathering is not just an existential state of being. It’s things people do. When you do it — when you’re a really good father — you’ll retain connection with your children.
•••• BLOG RULES ••••
This American Fathers Liberation Army Google Group, Page and Blog have been created for positive outreach, networking, distribution and discussion of information related to our cause. All participants must post under their real identity and agree to abide by the following rules and regulations, as well as the Google Bill of Rights and Responsibilities.
RESPECT FOR OTHERS:
You may not post content that:
• Attacks individuals or groups, or expresses contempt or hatred, based on race, ethnic background, gender, sexual orientation, age, or disability.
• Attacks another person as opposed to his or her statement. A poster may say another person’s opinion is foolish: he or she may not say that the person is a fool.
• Is obscene, indecent, vulgar, or profane.
• Violates or infringes on the privacy or public rights of others, or is a personal attack on an ex-spouse.
• Contains the name, address, telephone number or other personal information of another individual.
You may not post content that:
• Is threatening, abusive, harassing, deceptive, libelous, defamatory, or pornographic.
• Constitutes or encourages criminal offenses, gives rise to civil liability, or otherwise violates state, national or international law. Infringes on any copy right, trade secret, patent or other proprietary right, without the explicit permission from the owner or right holder.
You may not post content that:
• Engages in slander or makes accusations. Remember the playground test. Would you consider it appropriate if your child made the same – or similar – statement on the playground.
• Discusses details of pending legal cases.
• Would embarrass you – or anyone else – now or five years from now. The internet has a long memory.
• Solicits legal advice.
• Offers legal advice.
You may not post content that:
• Contains a commercial or advertising message or solicits a product or service or personal business.
• Disrupts forum discussions with irrelevant, off topic messages or an excessive number of messages - a flooding attack - or otherwise negatively affects the ability of a participant to post comments.
• Information that is false, deceptive, misleading or intentionally misinformative.
• Has no relation to the topic of the thread in which it is posted.
Together with you in the love of our children,
PLEASE FOLLOW OUR BLOG AT
- Children's Rights CauseAdminsitrator, presentDevelopment and implementation of all domestic relations programs, focusing on child custody, child support and domestic violence, using a variety of strategies including litigation, legislative advocacy, administrative advocacy, and publications. 10300 Sunset Drive - Miami, FL 33173 - Office: 305-270-7796
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Do Florida Family laws and Child Custody laws violate the U.S. Constitut...
Florida Statute 61.13 covering divorce and child custody is unconstitutional Do Florida divorce and child custody laws violate the U.S. Cons