Profile cover photo
Profile photo
Bruce Derman
23 followers -
Bruce Derman Ph.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist in private practice in Woodland Hills and Santa Monica, California who specializes in working with people in all stages of relationships.
Bruce Derman Ph.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist in private practice in Woodland Hills and Santa Monica, California who specializes in working with people in all stages of relationships.

23 followers
About
Posts

Are men and women equal in an affair? 

I don’t see any intrinsic difference. You would think that men have much more need to prove themselves sexually because of their primary sexual fantasy. The fantasy of proving they are desirable to all women. It is hard for a marriage to satisfy that primary fantasy.

Women also have a primary fantasy which connection and security. Both fantasies are insatiable and neither one can be satisfied, but marriage really goes against the man’s primary fantasy more than it goes against the woman’s primary fantasy. However if your connection is weak with your man you are just as vulnerable to affairs.

#couplestherapy   #coupletherapy   #relationshipadvice  
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
There's a good reason why the divorce rate is as high as it is. Did you know that your partner is a reflection of you?

Many couples talk about their partners as less than them in some core way. That is the primary reason the divorce rate is so high, since only unequals split apart. 

Click to read more in my article on Yourtango...
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
Couples Therapy – Emotional Abuse

Emotional abuse is anytime you use different feelings or different emotions to manipulate and control the other person. Take something, for example, like anger. Most people who say they are anger, are not angry. Anger is a five minute event and it’s over. When you see most people displaying anger, it’s not a five minute event. It can be a five year event. So what most people do under the guise of anger is hostility, resentment, punishment, and disgust. These things have no time limit. All of those expressions, when in a relationship,  don’t have a beginning or an end to them, and thus become abusive, especially when it goes on and on and creates tremendous emotional damage to the relationship.

The whole area of abuse gets distorted because we are biased. We tend to define abuse based on whether or not there has been physical battering or not. But the physical abuse that occurs in relationships is a very small amount. 
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
Couples Therapy – The Difference Game People Play to Stay in Their Comfort Zones

There are several things you can do in life: moving forward, moving backward, moving against, moving up and moving down. A particular comfort zone for certain people is being fine with withdrawing, which would be moving backwards.
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
Add a comment...
Wait while more posts are being loaded