Do you believe any of the following?:
- Chemtrails are totes legit (cause our government can't even keep bridges from collapsing, but somehow has their shit together enough to carry out a vast plot to poison the entire country with chemicals released in the air from 30,000+ feet)
- Aliens built the pyramids (because clearly all those brown people couldn't possibly have been good enough at math or science to build something hundreds of years ago that white people are only now beginning to understand)
- The moon landing was fake (because even though today's very BEST CGI effects are completely obvious, the government somehow managed to master flawless special effects in 1969 for the purpose of... What, exactly?)
- Immunizations cause autism (and by extension that Jenny McCarthy is a smart, capable, well informed woman and NOT in fact a hollowed out silicone and peroxide fallout shelter)
If you believe any of those things I have one more little tidbit of secret info that the government, the illuminati, and big pharma don't want you to know... Standing with your genitals as close to the microwave as possible while cooking your meals is the cure for autism AND will make you immune to the effects of chemtrails! No, really! Go do it...EVERY time you cook something. Future generations will thank you.