An emigrated verse on an immigration theme...


UK ads to make immigrants warier:
Cold and wet, not a real EU area -
Little Englanders sour:
73p an hour
Is the minimum wage in Bulgaria.

Hypocritical Christians Mr-and-Mrs-Daily-Mail-reader don't want to share the joys of life in Britain with impoverished Bulgarians and Romanians, who from December are to be allowed to freely travel to and work in the interesting part of the European Union.

Fearing the votes of a rabid popular press readership, UK political parties are battling to see who can be the most racist towards them - without crossing the line and being racist, which is illegal there.  This is how they think now.  

Cameron wants voters to think the government is planning a sort of anti-PR campaign, to frighten anyone thinking of taking on the British bureaucracy that it really, really, isn't very nice there, but cold, rainy and...foreign.

A description of the horrendous Council Tax regime, doped drinking water, the nasty welfare system, or how they'll be living in squalor and randomly murdered in the street by local patriots might be more effective.  But they have decided to focus on the weather.

You are likely to find yourself at least partly outside the system, which is designed to make things as hard as possible for everyone except passive-aggressive bureaucrats.  

Even the Christians are shocked at the hurdles and exploitation migrants face:

What is not clear is why the EU allowed Britain a special derogation preventing free movement from these particular countries in the first place.  After all, migrants have been "stealing" the crappiest jobs that no-one wanted to do for decades, and between 1502 and 1807 European ships helped some 12 million Africans find new careers.  The British idea is that Europeans are inefficient and lazy - in fact the British system is the dehumanising, relaxophobic exception in Europe.

Having left the UK, making space for one Bulgarian, I found in the reverse situation that Slovenians are extremely welcoming, tell you not to speak Slovenian and offer no facilities for learning it anyway, seeing nothing but a rich immigrant, who should not be allowed to work, and who will answer all their needs regarding free cultural information (like this), explain the tricks of survival under capitalism, and top it off for them with a free English lesson.

The complete opposite, in other words, of the immigrant experience in the UK.  Perhaps it's true about those scrounging foreigners after all!

However the UK does tolerate certain types of pointless, unemployed east European immigrant:

The official UK minimum wage is £6.19.
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