deleted historic national poetry

It later turned out under FOI that the church companies were indeed the bad bank's biggest hole-ding.


Dear Slovenia (is it that one?)

I am a Pope, with several bankrupt businesses in an obscure south-east European country.

Please this Christmas could you get me a Bad Bank and let me off paying the money I say I lost.

My bad luck with the real estate, education, publishing, and socio-cultural investments has left me with just EUR6.3bn in assets in the bank, according to me, plus various useless jewels and metals, and a few things that wouldn't fit in the bank e.g. the Philippines.

Please Mr Santa, ignore any lies contradicting this from that Sr. Gotti Tedeschi: my shrink friend says he is a loony!

When you have let me off, I will be continuing whining for donations - from people scared of dying, and desperate small business folk hoping for favours.

Times are hard for us Popes. Just today, in a wicked and unfair ruling, 170 dirty boys from one children's home in Yorkshire - who have been making a nuisance of themselves in the British courts since they became possessed by the Devil between 1965 and 1992 - are demanding £8 million, although we managed to make some of our religious employees legally responsible for part of it.

Altogether I have had to pay out $3.3 billion to naughty boys and girls during the last 15 years but mostly boys.

I promise to employ lots of Slovenian lawyers to continue twisting things around, and spin any future cases out for years until as many of the victims as possible are dead and in hell, which is of course where they belong for saying these bad things about me and the members of my gang in the first place.

Many Slovenians know nothing of the alleged problems with the bummings and the photos as the information tends not to get published in a language they understand.

When you don't know something exists it is the same as when it doesn't exist. So in Slovenian there is no proof that any of these bad things happened.

Even if they did it was somewhere else and a long time ago, and not done by real Catholics but by repressed, uptight sex weirdos and inbred village pervs yuk!

Please please PLEASE Mr Santa, I love Coca-Cola and gibanica and I promise to be a good Pope from now on if I can just have this Bad Bank just this one time.

All the other backward countries either have one already, or are getting one this Christmas and I really really REALLY want it, thank you ever so!!!

The Pope
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