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Global Script
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I have vowed bloody vengeance on all wikis
I have vowed bloody vengeance on all wikis

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So, I'm starting over again on a new Global Script implementation. The good news is, it only took me a couple of hours to get the "undefined" test case passing (including getting coffee :)).
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The consensus seems to be that there's no way to force the calls to the current time function to actually bracket the enclosed code. Fundamentally, this is the issue with implementing algorithms using side effects: it makes optimization a choice among really bad options.
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rename [options] expression replacement file...
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Yet another reason Haskell's non-layout syntax is utterly horrible . . .
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tl;dr: The way ELisp parses function definitions makes it trivial to accidentally implement self-modifying code using the standard mutable data syntax. Good going, ELisp!

More generally: now do you believe me that mutable-by-default data is a terrible idea?
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"eval as a string defining function requires "(" and ")" as prefix and suffix"

JavaScript, that is weak
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