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I am a survivor
I am a survivor
AMANTHA's posts

So , okay my mom told my daughter that she does not want me talking about her life. I am sorry but, this is about my life.
My parents got divorced when I was 21 months old. My mom said my dad cheated ,he said he didn't. Sorry, Dad don't belive  you.I remember my Dad always having Kathy around but, when I asked her she said my mom was already gone. I belive her she has never lied to me. My mom hates her but, I think there were other woman before Kathy that my dad had. But, I understand my mom need to blame someone so it was her. There are somethings I wish my parents wouldn't of told me  because in the long run it has done nothing but hurt me and confused me as I was growing up. I always felt like I was the pawn in the middle of them. There were times I wished that they were not my parents at all or that I would have never been born.

My Mom had struggles with me through her pregnacy alot to do with my Dad from stress and her Kidneys. I finally arrivied in May of 1973. I think my mom thought things were going to get better. Wrong. My Mom told me that my Dad was not happy that I was a girl and not a boy. The doctor told my dad that he would take me because if wife just lost a little girl. My dad so no we'll keep her. Like I was a puppy or somthing. Talk about feeling not wanted .Jeez. Glad that was such a hard decision for him.

My parents met in the summer of 1972. By Aug 1972 they found out my mom was pregnat and they were married in Sept. From what I take things just keep going down hill. My mom was emotional from my Dad and my dad was a complete ass according to my mom. My Dad was all about my Dad he still is . They fought all the time. I wonder ehy he married my mom. He made her life hell. I didn't understand  why she stayed but, now I do my mom was a pleaser and she just wanted a family. He just wanted to do what he wanted to do.

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Have you ever wondered why your here? I use to all the time. It started when I was around 4. I use to wonder if my parents even wanted me. I asked my Mom she said yes and I belive her.But, my Dad not so much. I think I was more a burden than anything.

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Me now 2012
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