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All Women as Women, but my - Goddess funny yellow T-shirt
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USSR - Union of Soviet Socialist Republics (CCCP on russian) - the state that existed from 1922 to 1991 in Europe and Asia. The USSR occupied almost 1/6 of the Earth's habitable land and was the largest country in the world by area. T-shirt is available in different sizes from S up XXL.
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Car mechanic, known as Uncle Vova, had a special relationship with the technique: he preferred Russian-made cars. His sympathy for the trademark of AvtoVAZ he also expressed by Lada T-shirt. Uncle Vova was convinced that he had no reason to buy the new technique, as it is still in time become as old. Because of its extensive experience auto mechanic, he could repair any model Lada. Once luckily to Uncle Vova, his neighbor desperate to sell an old Lada of 7 model because it was in disrepair, so he decided to give this car to Uncle Vova, on condition that he drag it into his garage by himself. Uncle Vova gladly accepted the gift, it does not bother rusted bottom, missing radiator, a broken engine - for the master of his class it was nothing. Uncle Vova in Lada T-shirt sat behind the wheel of his old " Quartet", attached "Seven" by tow, which he asked his son to drive. It should be noted, garage Uncle Vova was not far away. The cars stopped at a traffic light, the tow sag and landed on the pavement. At this time, a man with two empty buckets decided to cross the road between the "Quartet" and "Seven." How can you then do not believe in signs: at the very moment when the runner was stepping over the tow, Uncle Vova moved. The man fell and dropped the bucket, they flew through the air and hit the windshield of a passing "Peugeot". Towing resumed three hours later. During this time, they managed to wait for the police, to file a report about the collision of foreign cars with empties, clap a bucket on runner’s head, who demanded to compensate for moral damage and stabilize the battered dishes. After about a hundred yards the second accident had happened: a driver has left his "Volkswagen" with no brake, and it’s rear bumper has driven in the right wing of our "Seven." The same police officers arrived. Seeing familiar Lada T-shirt, they are quietly chuckling and offered honorary escort to garages for a reasonable price. Uncle Vova proudly refused, as it turned out, in vain. Uncle Vova’s garage is multileveled; it’s possible to enter his box to the ramp only. Right on the rise rope unhooked. Here Uncle Vova's son, who was driving behind the wheel of "Seven" and learned that the brakes of this car do not work either. As it turned out, the son of Uncle Vova skillfully drives the car in reverse. And also knows how to make the right decisions in critical situations. Flying out of the garage door, the car miraculously missed the other two, swerved past the third and imprinted into the concrete fence trash. When Uncle Vova, shooting Lada T-shirt on the run, rushed to the site of the third accident, son already tried to combine in the space the light and a cigarette by shaking hands.
- Hey, Dad - he said to Uncle Vova - hand over this machine for recycling, I'll add, how much is necessary, only buy something new, please!
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Once I decided to show off: to climb on the girl's balcony. The girl lived on the second floor.
I bought flowers, took a backpack for them to free the hands, put on Trust me Im Russian! T-shirt. In order to anything prevent me, I put keys, pocket money, and phone into my backpack. Flowers were high for a backpack, but I have secure with the zipper on both sides.
And here is a cornstalk climbing in Trust me Im Russian! T-shirt along the wall with a backpack on his back. And from backpack flowers stick up and swaying over the head of a fool, like a halo. Overall - I made this big step to the balcony. But the most interesting just began. The balcony was glazed. Necessary step to do on the side, to go around the corner and two step to the front of the box. No problem - it was quite decent gap for feet at the bottom. I held on to the tin cornice by hands. Then the problems started. The window, which was open 365 days a year, open wide open, always open – now is not open! And from there, from the inside, came the sound of music. Loud music. I timidly knocked. Desperate gesture. And just as useless. I did not want to get off back. I started out with one hand to unbutton for backpack, trying not to make any sudden movements, I attempted to get the phone. In the end, I got it. Half of the bouquet lying somewhere at the ground, but it's acceptable losses. I began to pick up number. I had half a second lot. I had to pinch the phone between shoulder and ear, I had to let go ledge, I had time to pray and remember something from the past. And I had grab a glass.
If Spider Man saw me at the moment, sure, he threw in a closet his red-and-blue uniform and run to change it into Trust me Im Russian! T-shirt.
As a student of high school, I realized that everything I do is breaking the laws of physics: holding an absolutely smooth surface is impossible. No any laws for me at that moment. And in the tube long beeps were heard. No, of course someone might say - second floor is not too high. But I'll tell you - the second floor is high. Especially when phone resets - dialed number does not answer. And you standing sticking to the glass in the Trust me Im Russian! T-shirt. And flowers swinging over your head. I do not remember, how: by ear, by shoulder, or by telekinesis - but I managed to redial number. And she picked it up. And I'm trying not to especially loud to say the words, asked her to go to the balcony. But why?? Why is it always in such a moment, the girls, if you something ask them, not in a hurry to fulfill, but interested in, why do you want them to do this? Once again, I quietly asked her to open the balcony. It must have been something in my voice that she understood only the second time. Nonetheless! The act was appreciated! Right on the balcony! But, after moment, when I dragged Trust me Im Russian! T-shirt, the doorbell rang. This alert neighbors called the police. Told that the apartment burglar climbed through the window. With the flowers!
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Оne fine day I made a bet with a friend, that an hour I would count a hundred of Russians between the 17th and 23rd Avenue Geary Boulevard in San Francisco. My opponent said immediately:
- How do you distinguish them at first sight from the Americans or the Europeans? Is everyone you meet will ask or only the most suspicious or passers-by?
- No, they’ll admit themselves!

And so we came to the marked area. Saturday was also crowded, as usual here in the evenings. I'm wearing a Spetsnaz VDV T-shirt, patch and badge People's guard, which I kept from the Soviet era with certificate - just in case.

I won a bet in 40 minutes - Russian counters not only stared at my Spetsnaz VDV T-shirt with wondering eyes, and immediately joined the conversation. We were pleasantly surprised when we realized how a lot of our countrymens were here. There were people of all ages and status. In their response to my image we could make some assumptions about their biography, the older generation, apparently, remembered hooligan youth and habitually fell into confusion at the sight of People's guard. Just want to reassure my readers, all these meetings ended in a very positive way. 

Finally, even far beyond the stipulated Russian squadron, Russian was even a cop. This is where the handy combatant the People's guard certificate, when he requested the documents on wearing Spetsnaz VDV T-shirt, patch and badge. Of course, the cop joked, it was all right with a sense of humor, and, as well as other counter pedestrians amused Spetsnaz VDV T-shirt and novel situation, which we organized on territory entrusted to him. He remembered the excitement youth and told us how to patrol the streets at night. 

We even talked, which is not bad to make something like this in the U.S. Cop disappointed us a little: it appears that the U.S. has long existed National Guard. Only when everything is more serious than it used to be with us: patch and badge plus three days to annual leave - and that’s all. There is much more obvious advantages: the shape ... weapons ... training ... Bunch of benefits ... A free public transport which is - who has been in America, of course, will understand me. We parted friends, I promised to give him the same Spetsnaz VDV T-shirt.
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