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Ray Vallese
Editing, copy editing, proofreading
Editing, copy editing, proofreading


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My RPG style guide Writing With Style is now available on Amazon in print or Kindle formats. If you've read it and are willing to post a review there (or if you share this with other folks who can do so), you will earn karma points that you can redeem with the universe for future favors!

(Probably. I mean, I don't run the universe. As far as you know.)
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Karen is a great editor who has some open slots coming up. If your text needs some TLC, or if you're not really sure what it needs, I bet she can help.

Immediate openings for short (30K words or fewer) pieces (3 cents / word)

Slots for 80K words or more available from October onward (also 3 cents / word)

Also taking MS review (1 cent /word) for short nonfiction (2500 words or fewer) and Developmental Critique (any size, priced at $35/hour, minimum charge 2 hours)

Click the link for information on services, billing / payment, and more.

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My new book Writing With Style has been out for about a week and is an Electrum Best-Seller at DriveThru RPG (in the top 3.89% of products on the site). Will it hit Gold and then Platinum status? An editor can dream.

Thanks to Rogue Genius Games (and +Owen Stephens) for being a great publishing partner!
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I wrote a guide of quick and easy editing tips to help game writers tighten and polish their text. It offers 45 pages of concise suggestions to help you turn over a cleaner manuscript to your editor or publisher. Now on sale for $4.95 at the DriveThru RPG link below.

(And don't tell anyone, but most of these tips will help fiction writers, nonfiction writers, and pretty much everyone.)

(No, wait, tell everybody!)

(Text below shared from +Owen Stephens, whose company, Rogue Genius Games, published the guide.)

There is WAY more to being a good roleplaying game (RPG) writer than rules and plots and neat ideas.

There's style.

And so we present a Style Guide with Style

Writing With Style: An Editor’s Advice for RPG Writers presents 45 pages of concise tips on simple ways to make your roleplaying game writing cleaner and clearer. This guide doesn’t show you how to structure adventures, build stat blocks, or create worlds. Instead, Ray Vallese looks at some of the most common and easily fixable grammar and style issues he’s encountered in over twenty years of editing RPGs.

Rookie freelancers, industry veterans, and self-publishers alike can benefit from this (mostly) jargon-free guide, which addresses such topics as:
• Recasting passive voice into active voice (and when you might not want to)
• Dangling participles and other misplaced modifiers
• Gender-specific and gender-neutral language
• Commonly confused words, empty words, and clichés to avoid
• Choice and possibility in player character actions
• Final things to check before submitting your manuscript

Tighten and polish your text with these quick and easy tips!

Available now in pdf, and soon in POD!

Take your writing to the next level, and enjoy a well-written book by someone with more than 20 years experience looking at RPG manuscripts.
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When you have no idea how you'll hit your deadlines but you just gotta.
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After today, tj4t will go on hiatus until I gather enough good new jokes to keep it going. I don't know if that means two weeks, two months, two years, or longer, but never fear -- tj4t will return! (probably)

What do you call a waffle on a Southern California beach?
A sandy Eggo.

Did you hear there was a streaker in church Sunday?
They caught him by the organ.

What’s a good name for a lion tamer?

Why do teenage girls always travel in odd numbers?
Because they can’t even.

A woman tells her doctor, "Kiss me!"
The doctor says, "What? Why would I do that?"
She says again, "Kiss me now!"
He replies, "Certainly not!"
She demands a third time, "Doctor, I want you to kiss me!"
He answers, "No! It's unprofessional, highly unethical, and to be honest, we probably shouldn't even be having sex right now!"
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Editing. The author wrote that the villain liked to sew confusion. That must be where ugly sweaters come from.
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Why do archaeologists have so much fun?
They really dig their work.

I’m familiar with only 25 letters of the alphabet. I don’t know why.

Where do you learn to make ice cream?
Sundae school.

I wouldn’t buy anything with Velcro. It’s a total rip-off.

A couple was golfing on a very exclusive golf course lined with million-dollar houses. On the third tee, the husband hit the ball right through the window of the biggest house on the course.
Nervously, they walked up, knocked on the door, and heard a voice say, “Enter!” They opened the door and saw glass all over the floor and a unique broken bottle lying on its side in the foyer. A man sitting on the couch said, “Are you the people that broke my window?”
"Er, yes. Sorry," the husband replied.
"Actually, I want to thank you. I'm a genie and was trapped for a thousand years in that bottle. You've released me. I can grant three wishes. I'll give you each one wish, and I'll keep the last one for myself."
"Wow!" the husband said. "I want a million dollars a year for the rest of my life."
"It’s the least I can do!” said the genie. He turned to the wife. “And what do you want?”
"I’d like a house in every country of the world," she said.
"Consider it done." the genie replied.
"And what's your wish, genie?" the husband asked.
"Well, since I've been trapped in that bottle, I haven't had sex with a woman in a thousand years. I’d like to sleep with your wife."
The husband looked at his wife and said, "Well, we did get a lot of money and all those houses, honey. I’m okay with it if you are.”
She agreed, so the genie took her upstairs and ravished her for hours.
Afterward, he rolled over and asked her, "How old is your husband, anyway?"
"He’s 35," she replied.
"And he still believes in genies?”
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Here are several classic jokes and a new one. (“Classic” sounds so much better than “old jokes I’m rerunning that I hope you’ve forgotten,” doesn’t it?)

When do pterodactyls go to the bathroom?
I don’t know. The P is silent.

How many mice does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Just two. The hard part is getting them into the light bulb.

Why didn't the lifeguard save the hippie in the ocean?
He was too far out, man.

What happens if you don’t pay your exorcist?
You get repossessed.

A young blonde woman in New York City was so depressed that she decided to end her life by jumping off the Brooklyn Bridge. She was about to leap into the frigid river below when a handsome sailor saw her tottering on the edge of the bridge.
He took pity on her and said "You have so much to live for. I'm off to Europe in the morning, and if you like, I’ll stow you away on my ship and you can start a new life overseas. I'll take good care of you during the trip and bring you food every day."
"How can I repay you for such kindness?" she asked.
"Just let me make love to you each night." The woman agreed.
That night, the sailor brought her aboard and hid her in a lifeboat. From then on, every night he brought her sandwiches and fruit, and they made passionate love until dawn.
Two weeks later, during a routine inspection, she was discovered by the captain. "What are you doing here?" he asked.
She explained, "One of your sailors stowed me away. I get food and free passage to Europe, and he's screwing me."
"He certainly is," the captain said. "This is the Staten Island Ferry."
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The first joke today is one of my new favorites. It's just so wonderfully bad.

What do you call it when a mummy farts?
A toot uncommon.

How do you kill a circus?
Go for the juggler.

What do you call an obnoxious potato?
A dictator.

Judge: Have you ever been up before me?
Defendant: I don’t know, Your Honor. What time do you get up?

A woman wakes up to find a bear on her roof. She checks the phone book and finds a number under “Bear Removal.” She calls and a man shows up with a van, a baseball bat, a pit bull, a shotgun, and a ladder. She asks him what all the gear is for.
The man replies, “I use the ladder to climb to the roof. I’ll knock the bear off with the bat. The dog bites the bear's genitals as hard as it can, subduing him so I can get him in the van.”
The woman asks, “What’s the shotgun for?”
The man says, “In case the bear knocks me off the roof – you shoot the dog!”
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