In honor of +Jessi June and her modeling post about being naked when modeling, I have decided to post

"How to get over the naked feeling while shopping."

See, when I first started shopping naked, there was a lot of problems with it. One, it was slightly illegal, so I was thrown in jail a couple times with indecent exposure and the other one is that you had a really tough time getting a cashier that would give you service since you almost always violated the "no shoes, no shirt, no service" policy. I did try wearing shoes and a shirt once, with no pants, that worked once, but the next day that same business had added in the phrase "no pants." As you can see my dilemma, it was very difficult.

Well, I'll handle the questions before they come out now. In order to get over that naked feeling, all you really have to do is to focus yourself, take a few deep breaths and prepare yourself for what is going to happen. Next, after you are ready to shop naked you have to figure out what you are going to buy while naked. I suggest anything but medications and gas, the long wait for medications tends to give the cops enough time to arrest you, and gas stings if it gets in the wrong spots and is hard to wash off, to boot.

So, here is what you do, let say you're buying books. Ok, you completely undress, get in front of your laptop and type in the name of the bookstore, once that is done, choose your book, and purchase immediately! As you can see, technology has made shopping naked a little bit easier on everyone, which is great but has taken some of the challenge out of dodging the cops, finding a cashier, and getting home without being arrested. It just isn't as much fun as it is if you have a chance to end up on the next "Cops" episode.

Oh, there is one other large problem with shopping naked that I have found, where do you put your money?!? So, for this scenario, we're going to assume that you were smart enough to carry your money in your hand and not in the vertical card swipe that is built into your body.

With those tips, have fun and happy nude shopping!

Please be aware, the author of this post does not condone public nudity, the previous was written only as a fun parody of a great article by +Jessi June and is not meant to be taken as real advice, nor is it meant to be followed in any literal sense.
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