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Keith Lowell Jensen
Works at Comedy
Attends Success High School
625 followers|1,241,648 views
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My daughter joins me to introduce this clip about her, a frog, and that guy Jesus.
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Keith Lowell Jensen

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I like!
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You can support me getting a weekly stand up video online, while also getting yourself access to exclusive content. And that's a good thing.
Patreon is empowering a new generation of creators. Support and engage with artists and creators as they live out their passions!
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I worked on some new material and did some riffing last Friday.
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+Keith Lowell Jensen What's funny about birth control is that there are no male options for it.


If you told a woman "If you didn't want to have a baby, you shouldn't have had sex!" that would be sexist. And yet, how many people consider it sexist to say the same to the man?


Feminists do not want a male birth control pill. Feminists are afraid men would say they're on it when they're not. Because women never never never ever do that, right?


Women have a wide assortment of options to keep from getting pregnant. This means, in effect, women choose to get pregnant! And yet, who do we hold accountable when a woman gets pregnant? Certainly not the person with all the options! We hold the man accountable! As if he has any options should the condom break, should she choose not to take birth control, should she steal his semen from a used condom, or even if she raped him!


Once she's pregnant, she can get an abortion, or unilaterally adopt the baby. Where's his rights to have any say over the baby's fate?


"But you don't understand! Having to carry a baby for nine months, then push the Exxon Valdez through the Erie Canal is no picnic!"


Yeah yeah yeah yeah. Well, I got news for you: Spending three to six months in jail out of the year, with the rest of your time being homeless and jobless, for the rest of your life, is no picnic either. Seriously. We need more women in that position!


Where's the men's "legal abortion" rights? Where's the men's pill?


"Feminists are trying to fix it!"


No. They're not. They're more concerned with boobs on Page 3, because telling a woman how to dress is totally not slut shaming when they do it. They're more concerned about scantily clad women in video games because telling women how to dress is totally not slut shaming when they do it. They're more concerned about having t-shirts made by oppressed and exploited women to prove just how much for women's liberation they are. They're more concerned about a scientist's t-shirt than your reproductive rights. They're more concerned with listen and believe, and creating safe spaces, and defending muslim rape gangs, then they are with your reproductive rights.


Don't get me wrong! I totally support women having those reproductive rights! I just wonder where the fuck are the men's reproductive rights?


I'm an intersex-transsex pansexual poly otherkin woman with a disability. So don't try to strawman me as a "traditionalist."


And that's another thing: Traditionalists and feminists know nothing about the sexes. How do I know? More transwomen kill themselves after transitioning. For me to transition, I'd have to pretend to be someone I'm not ... for more than two years! Fuck that shit. I'm fugly, and I know it! You can't tell me I need to wear miniskirts and halter tops for two years just to prove my femininity!


I'm a butch girl, in a relationship with another girl. The girl I'm in a relationship with has a goatee and always wears jeans, but nobody questions her femininity!


I'm supposed to let it all hang out and embarrass myself to be "all girly" to prove I'm a girl!? What. The. Fuck.


Fuck them. They do not know. They don't have a clue.


To get a fairly accurate description of the kind of person I am, watch MGTOW videos about girls. With only a very few of them being wrong in my case, they're mostly right! And even where they're wrong now they were right about me before. I have changed since I was a twenty something. Although I've always been fugly ...
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Watch my first special on youtube for free! 
And my current special is on Hulu for freeish.
Yay.
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People
In his circles
343 people
Have him in circles
625 people
Karinda Dobbins's profile photo
The Dave Attwood Show's profile photo
hannan satopay's profile photo
Muhammad Kamran Mustafa's profile photo
Ed Nash's profile photo
Paul Newton's profile photo
tung xue's profile photo
Nicholas Pettigrew's profile photo
Greg Ward's profile photo
Work
Employment
  • Comedy
    Comedian, present
Basic Information
Gender
Male
Birthday
March 5
Relationship
Married
Story
Tagline
The doctor says my hypochondia is all in my head
Education
  • Success High School
    Succeeding, Gravity Bongs, present
Links
Contributor to
Full disclosure: I perform here. That said, I love the crowds and the staff at Punch. I'm treated well, the audience has a good time and I have great time every time, whether I'm doing a set or just there to laugh.
Public - 10 months ago
reviewed 10 months ago
1 review
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