KANJERA, KENYA—In a groundbreaking find that provides new insight into early human behavior, a group of archaeologists from the Smithsonian Institute announced the discovery Friday of the first known hominid to own tools but never use them.
I didn't realize how bad the California water shortage was until I bit into my chicken club sandwich at LAX and discovered they had extracted every last molecule of juiciness and moisture from the chicken. Clearly they are using the techniques for cooking chicken that were perfected in the USU skyroom, it is good to see the work done there be applied outside the lab.
"The oversimplification of discovery makes science appear far less rich and complex than it really is." The New York Times on the disservice we do scientists and ourselves by popularizing falsehoods and oversimplified myths.
Warning: this comic occasionally contains strong language (which may be unsuitable for children), unusual humor (which may be unsuitable for adults), and advanced mathematics (which may be unsuitable for liberal-arts majors). BTC 1FhCLQK2ZXtCUQDtG98p6fVH7S6mxAsEey ...
I was sent to earth to discover what makes humanity tick. Turns out humanity isn't so much a clock as it is a bunch of cannibalistic parasites. Even real ticks don't bite other ticks, you disgusting morons.
Having been thoroughly befuddled by my original purpose here, to the point of wondering why I am here at all, I'm left wandering the world as a rogue linux system administrator. Days pass quietly as I bring order to cluster after cluster, tame wild schedulers and do my very best to make sure that no scientist lacks the CPU cycles they need. Shunned by my own kind for spurning devops practices, ITIL, the Cloud and open plan workspaces, I skirt the edges of system administration, darting from shadow to shadow, occasionally lobbing a technically correct but seriously unpopular rock into the crowd.
Basically I'm a bastard. But if you are doing work in the life sciences and have a cluster with no one to run it, I am the bastard you seek.
I once provisioned over 1300 nodes from a single provisioning server in under 10 minutes, including POST. I often use cat when it isn't necessary, simply because I like cat. I've been known to backspace over a perfectly acceptable grep command and replace it with an equivalent awk command for no apparent reason. I can pick up things with my monkey-like toes, but am too inflexible to lift them high enough to make this a useful skill.
Senior System Administrator
Solving technical problems. All of them.
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John Hanks's +1's are the things they like, agree with, or want to recommend.
Whenever I have a reason to be in or around Miami, I always make my way to this bakery. The pastries are delicious and the people are very nice. Prices are unbelievable before you taste what you picked out, afterwards you feel a little guilty for robbing them, but not guilty enough to stop you from making another pass for just one more of everything. Also, get a glass of the fresh squeezed orange juice, you won't regret it.