Profile

Cover photo
João Carlos Honório Pedro
Attends FCTUC
52 followers|11,744 views
AboutPostsPhotosVideos

Stream

 
I still can't stop laughing at this... XD
 
*A Cow based Economics Lesson;

SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbor.

COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk.

FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and sells you some milk.

NAZISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and shoots you.

BUREAUCRATISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then throws the milk away.

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.

ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND (VENTURE) CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more.
You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving you with nine cows.
No balance sheet provided with the release.
The public then buys your bull.

SURREALISM
You have two giraffes.
The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a consultant to analyze why the cow has dropped dead.

A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike, organize a riot, and block the roads, because you
want three cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever cow cartoon image called a Cowkimona and market it worldwide.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows, but you don't know where they are.
You decide to have lunch.

A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you.
You charge the owners for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.

A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN IRAQI CORPORATION
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb the ** out of you and invade your country.
You still have no cows, but at least you are now a Democracy.

AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Business seems pretty good.
You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.

A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
You have two cows.
The one on the left looks very attractive.
2
Add a comment...
 
Holy... Interesting college.
 
This ad for a technical college in the UK may be the most disturbing, hilarious thing I've seen all week.
1
Add a comment...
 
Time to share this everywhere.
1
Add a comment...
 
Touché, John... touché.
 ·  Translate
If SOPA passes, people who stream copyrighted music could go to jail for five years.
1
Add a comment...
 
In what manner of god forsaken reasoning does this come to pass? Why is a UK judge allowing extradition for something that isn't a crime IN THE UK. Can someone be judged for something that isn't a crime in their country but is a crime in the US after a most grave misuse of the extradition agreements? This is MADNESS...
I'm not from the UK but this disgusts me to no end...
1
Add a comment...
 
Stephenson, thou art downright idiotic.
Stephenson B Dyersburg of Tennessee has recently started a petition against Skyrim, or how he forms it “SkyRim”. He is claiming that the game is thr
1
JL A's profile photo
JL A
 
mas que raio?? O_O
Add a comment...
Have him in circles
52 people
Marian Wirth's profile photo
Naima Shaikh's profile photo
magdy elgamal's profile photo
carlos manuel costa Pedro's profile photo
Domus Vitae Piscina's profile photo
Luís Matos's profile photo
Jamie Hutton's profile photo
Fábio Marques's profile photo
Marco Pedrosa's profile photo
1
Add a comment...
 
THIS, THIS, THIS! For the love of all that's sacred, we should make this happen!
Create and share quick memes instantly.
1
Add a comment...
 
Oh, how sad that the president of the US actually thinks there's a problem with a flawed build.
Fred von Lohmann originally shared:
 
"Several [Hollywood] moguls have informed Obama’s newly anointed Hollywood re-election liason ... that they are pulling out of major fundraisers planned over the next few days and won’t participate in any more headed by Obama and House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi...."
1
Add a comment...
 
This... is going to be extremely important to get that bill off the table and into the incinerator.
1
Add a comment...
 
Exactly.
1
Add a comment...
People
Have him in circles
52 people
Marian Wirth's profile photo
Naima Shaikh's profile photo
magdy elgamal's profile photo
carlos manuel costa Pedro's profile photo
Domus Vitae Piscina's profile photo
Luís Matos's profile photo
Jamie Hutton's profile photo
Fábio Marques's profile photo
Marco Pedrosa's profile photo
Basic Information
Gender
Male
Education
  • FCTUC
    Licenciatura em Engenharia Informática, 2004 - present
  • Escola Secundária Avelar Brotero
    Tecnológico, 2001 - 2004