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Peter Bundle

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Readers, it has been an absolutely wonderful weekend. Myself and my wife Julie have thoroughly enjoyed ourselves. We were treated to an absolutely astonishing performance of Pyramus and Thisbe, which was then followed by the royal wedding. Hippolyta looked absolutely stunning, and her sister Antiope will no doubt soon be enjoying similar perks as one Pippa Middleton! I heard one young gentleman state that the moonlight really suited her. The revelry continued well into the early hours and Julie's feet were sore from all the dancing! I'm also pleased to say that amends were restored and the younger generation acted with grace and dignity, having sorted out any earlier quarrels. Hermia happily came to her senses after a stern talking to from her father, and her and Demetrius are happier than ever. Young Helena looked like the cat who'd got the proverbial, with a dashing Lysander on her arm. Whatever was happening with him and Hermia has been absolutely quashed and they didn't so much as glance at each other throughout the ceremony, I'm relieved to say. There was certainly no  place for drama.  / I'll sign off now readers, it's very late (early!) and I've promised July I'll see to the muffins when she awakes.  / Adieu!  / Peter Bundle.  #dream40

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Loyal readers, it's with a heavy heart that I make the following announcement: I shall no longer be publishing my docu-memoir 'The Secrets Inside His Chamber (and the man who kept the secrets)'. The 'man' in the title is me. And due to the recent (ridiculous) allegations that I've not been keeping the aforementioned secrets, myself and Julie felt that it was a tasteful move to shelve publishing for now. I want to thank all my readers for their support, and I want to reassure you that I WILL be continuing to blog, so no worries there. Check back after the celebrations for a round-up of events.
Peter Bundle.
For all the up-to-date hot goss from the court, follow me on plus

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Partner swap shock

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I am absolutely delighted to announce that my book, The Secrets Inside His Chamber (and the man who kept his secrets) is set to be published by Moonlight Press. I call it a 'docu-memoir' (I believe I'm the first to coin the name) – it's part autobiography, part biography. It will appeal to anyone who's ever wondered what REALLY goes on behind the closed doors of the court, and anyone who appreciates the amount of respect and discretion one must have when working for such esteemed members of our society. Moonlight Press is a new publishing company, set up by me and my wife Julie. The Secrets.... is our first and only publication so far. We have no immediate plans to publish anything else but we'll see how it goes! Check out this first mock-up of the cover. For all the up-to-date hot goss from the court, follow me on plus #dream40  

My wife Julie says I own too many golf clubs. Peter Bundle. #dream40  

The muffins were, predictably, delicious. Peter Bundle. #dream40  

My wife Julie has made muffins for breakfast. Peter Bundle. #dream40  

+Antiope - Hippolyta’s Maid  I have no idea what you're talking about. The piece is disgusting. Scurrilous nonsense. I am Theseus' discreet and loyal servant. #dream40

Well folks, as we draw closer to the royal nuptials, we begin to reflect on love. The marriage of Theseus and Hippolyta has been long-awaited, and we watch them eagerly with admiration and deep respect on the lead up to that most special of days.

It's a shame then, that Thippolyta are not receiving the respect they deserve from inside the court. This afternoon I was privvy to a most unfortunate squabble between Lysander and Demetrius, over the lady Hermia. Despite Hermia being betrothed to Demetrius, her and Lysander have been interchanging love tokens. And goodness knows what else. Egeus is absolutely furious that this guy has filched Helena's heart. Lysander's not the only one who has been up to no good by all accounts – Demetrius is said to have slept with lady Helena (and it's no secret that she's got the major hots for him). It's all a bit of a mess. Egeus and Theseus have delivered an ultimatum which despite its extremity is incredibly fair. I've got a lot of respect for the severity of their decision.

We can only hope that the feckless youths take heed and learn to respect the decisions of their elders. We wouldn't want the royal nuptials to be overshadowed by the sort of behaviour one might find documented on the pages of some scurrilous gossip mag. The next few days should be about dignity and reverence.

Peter Bundle. For all the up-to-date hot goss from the court, follow me on plus #dream40
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