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Inappropriate Suburbanite
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I wish I had more of a drumroll-worthy weight loss for you but instead, I have advice: don't try the sugar-free jelly beans.

I suppose it’s time for my two-month check-in. I wish I had more of a drumroll worthy weight loss for you, but as of this morning, I’ve only lost 35 pounds. Thirty-five pounds might be a shitload for the average person but let me assure you – this isn’t…
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Mourning Friends and Eulogizing Celebrities in a Medicated World

Carrie Fisher had a “cocktail” of cocaine, opiates and ecstasy in her system when she went into cardiac arrest at the end of last year. Chris Cornell is said to have died after taking a double dose of Ativan, which led to his “suicide.” Carfentanil,…
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There is a dark side of dieting. In case you’ve never had to live with eating less than 20 carbs a day – allow me to paint a picture.

For about a month now, I’ve been on a diet. That means no soft bread, rice or even cupcakes that my friends brought over for my birthday. No honey-glazed anything, no stress candy bar from Walgreen’s and of course, no beer. My old friend, full of smooth,…
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I love my kid and everything but on the last day of school, I needed to pen a quick open letter to Baby Jesus to help get us through the summer. #prayforme

I love my kid and everything but on the last day of school, I needed to pen a quick open letter to Baby Jesus to help get us through the summer. Dear Baby Jesus, As you know, today was the last day of school. That’s right; for twelve weeks our kids are…
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Everyone's entitled to a ranty Monday every once in a while...

My WTF-meter has been going off pretty often lately. A day doesn’t go by where I’m not shaking my head like the emoji that doesn’t know what the fuck is going on in the world. So I’ve saved up a few rants that I’ve wanted to vent about for cathartic…
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It's that time again, guys. Brace yourself. SUMMER IS COMING.

It’s that time again, guys. Within a few weeks all of our kids will be home for summer break, annoying us between the hours of 8 a.m. and 3 p.m. If we work at home or stay at home and don’t get credit for our work, we’ll be busy at a time when we are ……
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8 Ways I'm #ROCKINGMOTHERHOOD.

Heather from Word To Your Mother tagged me to take part in the Rocking Motherhood blog challenge. According to Heather, “the idea of Rocking Motherhood started with Patricia at White Camellias as a way for mothers to look at the job they are doing,…
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Can we get real about your inspirational online imagery?

https://inappropriatesuburbanite.com/2017/05/10/realistic-online-inspiration/
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I can scroll through my Facebook feed at any moment and view any myriad of inspiring horseshit containing vague references to your “strength" but can we be realistic about things?"

With social media gaining popularity in the past several years, email has become almost obsolete. Why email someone an important message when you can just tweet or text them? In fact, in my last couple of years of teaching I had to force students to…
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Almost all of the kids in our neighborhood are free range. But how is it that someone who is so anxiety-ridden, high-strung and such a worrywart able to allow her kid outside until the street lights come on? Well, I am a stalker.

Almost all of the kids in our neighborhood are pretty much free range. I enjoy the fact that they can run outside and play without an adult on their ass. They learn to entertain themselves, they get plenty of exercise and, let’s face it, it’s less work…
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