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Sallie Alys Montuori
Ayrfield, BSR, CCC, FanTek, FBA, LCoA, Ludus, SCA, TCEP, W&L, W&M
Ayrfield, BSR, CCC, FanTek, FBA, LCoA, Ludus, SCA, TCEP, W&L, W&M

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I don't have time to read this all the way through right now, but I've read enough to know that this is VERY important food for thought for young trans people and those who love them.
I'm not sure how many of you follow trans anything in the news, but as it's pride month and I already talked about trans things recently, I want to address a (sometimes willful) misconception and provide a perspective on an important topic: what do we do with children who say they're trans? How do we support them without harming them medically?

The reason I bring this up is because some in the media will have you believe that our message of support for trans kids translates into advocating that kids start hormone therapy ASAP. The scare tactic at the moment is to say we want to pump kids full of hormones at a young age as soon as they come out, and that kids are too young to know themselves anyway, so we need to stop trans folks from cause irreparable harm to young children.

Scaremongering aside, there are valid questions in there. Most of us knew that it wasn't just a phase when we were young, but we were young all the same -- too young to make a life-changing decision like what to do with ourselves medically. However, puberty is a scary time, because it puts you through many often permanent, irreversible changes. The shape of your body, the deepness of your voice, facial hair, etc. These changes are bad enough when you're cis, and feel like hell when you're trans.

The suggested response is multifaceted, but relatively simple. First, there's therapy, which can help children navigate these feelings and, if it gets that far, help them begin coming out socially. Next, if they're deemed appropriate, are puberty blockers. They prevent defining sexual characteristics from materializing for a while. In the meantime, children are given a chance to grow older, continue therapy, and spend more time on the issue. Regardless of what they decide later, hormone treatment, or lack thereof, can begin with little to no adverse effects. It's mostly just a delay to prevent the onset of dysphoric bodily characteristics, and grants more time for a decision. Nowhere have I seen a suggestion to begin hormone therapy at a young age, and it wouldn't be taken seriously anyway.

Now, another reason this is important. We hear all the time about how damaging it could be for someone to start hormone therapy and then realize they aren't actually trans after they've made changes to their body. Also fair. But the opposite never seems to be brought up. What about the damage inflicted on someone forced to go through a puberty they don't want? Some like to bring up "detransitioners," but these people are very few, and most trans people, if asked what they'd have done differently, will say they wish they'd gotten started sooner.

Side note -- think about why someone might detransition in the first place. It could just be they realized they weren't trans, but it's also possible they didn't want to deal with the abuse or trauma that can come with being trans these days. It's unfortunately common. There are a plethora of other reasons, but that's an essay on its own. tl;dr, when you see examples of detransitioners in media, they're usually being used as pawns.

There's a lot of effort that goes into being who you want to be. Trans people forced through the wrong puberty will sometimes spend thousands, tens of thousands, or even hundreds of thousands of dollars and years of their life on painful procedures to alter all sorts of things, with the hopes of getting somewhere even close to being someone they're comfortable with. Many can't afford to do this. Suicide rates are high among trans people, especially those who feel dysphoric or lack family support. Others suffer depression and anxiety. Are these not also valid points?

We see not transitioning as the default option. But really, that should be looked at as just as potentially harmful and damaging, especially to a young person. We also see transitioning later in life as an expensive and painful but necessary part of the process. It shouldn't have to be. We should talk about denying transition with as much concern as its opposite if we're actually concerned about the well-being of children.

There's no moral or ethical panic to be had here. Trans people know what it's like to grow up feeling wrong, so we're in no hurry to push that feeling on others. When a child says they feel they might be trans, they don't get surgeries and hormones the next day. But acceptance of trans people, and believing young people who come out or ask for help, needs to involve a re-evaluation of how we look transitioning and how we provide access to it. Our current strategy of asking people to just wait for any kind of treatment until after they've already gone through puberty can cause the very damage many scare tacticians supposedly want to prevent. Besides, that isn't really acceptance; it's just saying that no one can ever be certain of their identity until later in life. (Do we suggest the same confusion of kids who think they're cis?) Some might be uncertain, but for most, there's nothing confusing about it.

Worst case scenario, someone realizes they aren't actually trans and no harm is done. Maybe puberty comes a little late. Best case scenario, a child is spared going through something irreversible and potentially harmful, and given the chance to grow up the way they want and need.

So if you do stumble across an article claiming that the trans agenda is to get our kids started on hormones as soon as possible, you can dismiss that outright. But this is important, not just for those who may be anti-trans, but for allies as well. We need our families and friends and communities and medical professionals to be understanding and accepting, and to change their thinking on how to handle growing up trans. The solutions aren't harmful or damaging like some would have you believe, which is likely why they're trying to get a head start with their own misleading narrative. The goal here is to ensure young people are happy, regardless of who they like or how they identify, and for them to have the option to explore those identities in the first place.

As always, I'm open to questions and discussions in good faith.
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This is what I made for the last dinner I will ever have cooked in this house. It turned out pretty well, despite the substitutions I made due to the constraints of my own pantry clean-out. I will make it that way again, on purpose. Recommended.
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I finally found my embroidery hoop again. And now I can't remember who I had promised it to if I ever did! >.<
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Dear +Pokémon GO,

I am very sad. Since the last Android app update a couple of days ago, my journal no longer shows me the coins my pokemon bring back from gyms.

Worse still, I have just added my first friend, and my journal doesn't show me that either!

And worst of all, the app has treated me like a new player and made me choose my style all over again twice since the update. Plus, every time I try to re-choose a hat first when it does that, it shows 99999 coins (I have never had that many!) and crashes.

Please fix!

Also, could you please make it so I can dismiss the "GPS signal not found" error message, so I can see the new controls at the top of the page when I'm in my journal, or trying to move back and forth between my pokemon and my eggs? Thank you!

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Resharing as always.

Has it really been two and a half months since the last non-photo update? And a month since the last update of any kind? Oy. I guess it has. Moving will do that to you. This weekend is the final big push, and by Monday night we'll be out of the house we've lived in for a little over 25 years.

On the eye front, I finally got to see both the retina doc and the cataract doc this month. Not much has actually changed; the retina doc graduated me to "come back in six months" but kept me on the eye drops. The cataract doc has officially told me I don't need to come back; he's very pleased with how the right eye has progressed in the 15 months since that cataract operation (and a year since the capsule opacity procedure), and the remaining issues with the left eye all hinge on the retina.

Thanks to everyone who helped out with rhe drive to keep the utilities turned on. With your help we did manage to keep them from turning anything off, and come Monday the utilities for this place won't be an issue to us. That said, the rest of the bills are still hanging fire, including the medical bills.

So once again, because we can't afford shame, here's my shameless plug for help. Please PLEASE spread the word as much as you feel able; share this fundraiser on lots of social media, by email, even by writing the link on pieces of paper and passing them around. Encourage folks you know to donate and to spread the word themselves. I've estimated that I'll need about 1,000 different contributors to make the goal, so getting the word out is important. And IF YOU ARE ABLE TO, please donate, though we know that some of you have done so recently (THANK YOU) and lots of you just can't. But even a spare fin or sawbuck, if that's all you can afford, is appreciated. Every little bit helps. (Remember, NO FEELING GUILTY if you don't have the means to contribute, or enough spoons to spread the word as far as you'd like.)

And just like last time, if you have any job leads for either of us, PLEASE contact us! As you might guess, relocation IS an option, though for family reasons it would be good to stay within reasonable distance of our parents. Most of my best leads this month have been for positions where we would certainly have to relocate.

Happy Solstice (a day late) to everyone, whether it marks the beginning of summer or of winter. May the upcoming season prove to be not too harsh. And as always, thank you for your continued support.
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...and there was much rejoicing!
In a major victory for privacy, the Supreme Court has ruled 5-4 that cell phone location data is protected by the Fourth Amendment.
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We recently stumbled on a good sale and finally replaced our dead electric kettle. I love my little alien spaceship! :D
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Here's an interesting gluten-free thing.

Hey +Anne Murphy, are you still out there? Is this a method you use with any of your breads?

Cookbook available at or you can click through to use Townsends' affiliate link from the video's YouTube description.
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I reckon quite a number of my peeps would enjoy having a go at this...

After browsing the more than 150,000 items in its collection and spending the day snuggled atop the plush chairs, stayover guests can retire to one of the 26 boutique bedrooms on site.

Guests have access to the reading rooms until 10 p.m., a full five hours after they close to the public. They can even bring a book back to their room with them (except for those in the Gladstone Foundation Collection) for a bit of bedside reading.
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Is it just me, or is G+ failing to load media for anyone else today?

...or maybe it's just that my connection kinda sucks right now... :-/
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