I'm pruning the list of people I read without pruning the list of people I keep in circles so that they can see and respond to my posts, and I want to explain why. This is kind of a gloomy post, though, so you can skip it - there's no crisis, really, just ongoing ugh and my effort to deal with it.
As I've mentioned before, this is a slump year for me. Every day, pretty much, is a bad one, with low energy, low alertness, high aches and weakness and discomfort. These happen. It'll pass eventually, but there's no way to know in advance when.
I am erratically prone to an emotional problem: I'll read or hear about someone else's misery, rage, etc., and if it resonates with anything in my own experience, I start feeling their emotion as intensely as if it were my own. Further, it sets off vivid memories (often skewed, the way memories are in depression and such) of my own past junk, and that feeds depression in a big way.
This is always a possibility, but it happens more often when I'm already worn down and when I have to deal with a bunch of unavoidable misery. Well, the heat this summer is really taking it out of me on top of the general slump year, and the people I deal with face to face are having a bunch of unavoidable misery on various fronts. They're working on it as best they can, but sometimes the best available outcome is like "yes, we managed to slog one step forward today", or "yes, we only slid back a few steps today". So I'm unusually vulnerable to it.
And there's one more complicating factor: a bunch of people I know manage to operate, even if not well, at levels of misery and rage that push me into a purely biochemical collapse. Brain resources and other key physical assets get used up and I crash into my seizure-like episodes and other unwanted kinds of experience. So the unwished-for evocation can just outright do me in for a while, because while the other person's kind of managing to get through it, I can't.
So I'm going to be doing some ongoing management of circles and contacts and all. It's not that I've stopped liking people - when that happens, I just drop them and don't worry about it. This is about working out ways that I can stay in contact with the people I do like without getting crushed.
(No, I have no plans to name names. This genuinely isn't about others doing it wrong - it's entirely about my disabilities, and what I need to do in response. Y'all keep on keeping on.)