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Myesha Bolanos
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A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other the woman leans out the window and yells, "PIG!!"

The man immediately leans out his window and replies, "BITCH!!"

They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next corner, he crashes into a pig in the middle of the road.
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If you are a woman and you have recently started snoring, get your thyroid checked. Sometimes this can be an indication of an underactive thyroid, or hypothyroidism. This hormone imbalance can greatly affect your sleep patterns, because sleep is governed in part by a complex interplay of several different hormones.
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While her husband was lying down, his wife removed his glasses. "You know, honey," she said sweetly, "Without your glasses you look like the same handsome young man I married."


"Honey," he replied with a grin, "Without my glasses, you still look pretty good too!"
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Late night caffeine intake can easily trigger snoring. As caffeine is a stimulant, it can increase breathing and other bodily function activity levels. This can lead to restlessness in the body and snoring. The best thing to do is to avoid consuming caffeine in the late evening hours before bedtime.
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Consider purchasing a humidifier. When the air in your bedroom is dry, it can dehydrate the tissues and membranes of your nose and throat. This will irritate them, causing them to swell and restrict your airways which can cause you to snore. This is can be exacerbated during the winter when heaters actively dry out the air in your home. If purchasing a humidifier is not an option, try taking a hot, steamy shower before bed to inhale some hydrating steam.
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I was just having a conversation with someone who is about to buy a Mac.

I was against it and an argument started.

I said there were too few people supporting the Mac.

He responded, "When was the last time you heard of a virus on a Mac?"

And I said "See, even people who write viruses don't support Macs."
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Select a firmer pillow. A pillow that is too soft will not support your head properly and can cause your throat muscles to relax too much. Both of these situations can result in reduced airways and snoring. Switch to a firm pillow, or consider one specially designed for people who snore.
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One great tip that anyone who suffers from excessive snoring can implement is to use a nasal strip while you sleep. These strips help open up your nasal passageway making it easier to breath due to the fact that more air is allowed to flow through. They are easy to use and very effective.
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Heat a pot of water on the stove and breathe in its steam before you go to bed. Be sure, of course, to not burn yourself. Steam is a very effective moisturizer for your respiratory passages. Dry passages result in more snoring. This problem is remedied with the moisture from the steam.
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There are many ways to cut down on your snoring, and many of them involve different ways to manage the noise. If you pick up a wind instrument, practicing it can make your soft palate stronger. Keeping the muscles up there stronger will keep your air passageways open and will keep you from snoring.
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