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Maitri Libellule
Maitri is a writer, and artist who lives with her rescue pugs on the coast of NC.
Maitri is a writer, and artist who lives with her rescue pugs on the coast of NC.
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"...Maybe this is okay for some people today but it is not okay for me. I am so upset I can barely breathe. And when I called his phone today, to leave a message for his mother whom I know, hoping she would get it and know that I am here for her and to leave my number, I heard his voice and I nearly dropped the phone.

My Joey is gone. And I found out he died on FB, and it is not okay..."
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"...It is human nature to want things to return back to normal as quickly as possible after a major upheaval but the truth is after something as huge as a major hurricane blowing through that left incredible destruction in every direction in its wake “returning to normal” is not something that will happen quickly, and, more realistically, many things will never be the same again. The whole landscape of the town has changed. There is no finding our way back to something, there is only finding our way forward to what our new normal will be, and that takes time..."
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"...I don’t think I will carve them, I will leave them on the porch through Thanksgiving, and then I will figure out what to do with them. I want to really decorate for Christmas too. I want to live fully and celebrate life. That’s what “These Precious Moments” is all about. And I will be creating a special page just for this project that will talk about the magic of doing one of these 365 day projects too. You will find that new page some time this week when you click on the graphic link at the bottoms of these posts. For now it just links to yesterday’s post when I changed the focus of this project, but something special is happening now. I will take it one day, one moment at a time. In the end that’s all we ever have, one singular moment. It is a splendid place to rest and be. I am here now..."
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"...Something has happened, a shift has occurred, I don’t know what will happen tomorrow or the next day or the next and it’s not about writing about being all blissfully happy it’s about capturing the precious moments of my life as they come. This next year I am going to record my life and maybe really see what my life really means. I don’t know where this is going but I know this shift had to happen here. I have begun. For today that’s all that matters…"
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"... There was a moment of howling wind, the Japanese maple’s branches are whipping about wildly, I will stop here and get this up while I still have power. I hope you are safe wherever you are…"
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"...Today I have therapy and a whole host of errands. Mailing a package, medicine for Pugsley, groceries, water, and more. We could lose power again. There could be more impact with the trees here. We are to get a lot of rain. Some trees fall because the ground gets so soft from flooding and so much rain. And then we are not recovered from the hurricane that hit here. I look out my studio windows to the back at all the big dead limbs hanging that no one has been able to come and get down yet. Some are very large and high up and overhang the back of my house. Will they come down? We all thought whatever damage we had was what we had. But they are predicting potential high winds here too. There is no way to know what will happen..."
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"...I want to write blog posts that matter. Today I just don’t have it in me. I came. I touched base. That is all. Some days that might be what happens. Not often, but some days. This is one of them..."
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"...This, too, is “Infinite Compassion.” It is caring enough about yourself to do what you need to do to be okay even when it’s hard some days, or not convenient, or maybe you’d rather just watch Netflix. And taking care of myself is an act of compassion not only for myself but for my loved ones. If I don’t take care of myself, to the best of my ability, and something happens to me, they are the ones who have to pick up the pieces and that’s not fair. They would be happy to help me, they have helped me, but I deserve that help only when I really need it after first doing my own work to take care of me first. This is a lesson that took a long time to understand and I take it very seriously now. This is compassion-in-action. This is doing our work to spare others suffering. It is absolutely essential..."
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"...This seemingly inconsequential thing has become important, meaningful times in our day. I feel more relaxed about everything once we are back in the house. I am relaxing and letting go of a lot of things now, post hurricane. There is no way to rush this process of recovery, it will take a long time to fix things, to get trees and hanging limbs taken down, to find our way to what life will be now. What I am learning walking the dogs is helping me with relaxing and becoming more patient about the endless tasks that need to be done to try to find our way to a new normal post hurricane. It is hard, but I am finding there is an element of “It’s only as hard as you make it,” that can teach me about patience in other areas of my life. I am learning, slowly..."
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"...I am starting to breathe a little easier. I am beginning to feel both sadness but also tenderness for that young frightened girl. I am beginning to look at what is, now, today, in this moment, and clutch it to my heart, to see the value in it, to see that I have worth, that I am okay, that I am safe, that everything will be okay. That is harder to believe, that last bit, but I am working on it. I said in my post yesterday that I am on a mission to heal my broken heart. In so doing I am creating fertile ground for a whole new life to grow. I believe this is possible, and that I can finally believe this is huge. With this belief I will move forward a little bit more today, if only a tiny step forward, it is still a step. I am not where I was, in this moment, in the middle of the night. I hope not to be again. I am still afraid, but I will move on from here..."
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