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Stuart Duncan (AutismFather)
aka AutismFather - Upgrading Autism Awareness to Autism Understanding and Acceptance
aka AutismFather - Upgrading Autism Awareness to Autism Understanding and Acceptance

Stuart's posts

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One of the children on the Autcraft server just said "I think I'm retarded"... when the rest of the server assured him that he is not, he replied "i feel it true because its been said so long."

THIS is the problem with bullying.

Bullying doesn't toughen you up. It doesn't make you stronger. Mistakes do that. Mistakes happen and then you move on and you learn from them.

Bullying isn't a mistake. Bullying lasts. It persists. It does not stop. And even if you do get away from the bullies, that feeling stays with you. It wears you down.
When you're different, as children with autism clearly are, you become a target for these bullies. Not just for a single bully but for multiple bullies. For many many people. Sometimes even their parents.

When you have to endure that for so long... you start to believe it. You start think you don't deserve to be happy. You don't deserve to be proud of yourself. You don't deserve to live.

It takes a lot to bring a person back from that, especially a young child with autism. But that's why Autcraft is here. A community can do what one person can not. A community can support you more than a single person ever could.

I wish you could see all the others telling this child "I care" and reassuring him of what he's worth.

This is why I need Autcraft to continue and to do well. Not for my sake but for his sake and the sake of everyone that needs it.

It's no exaggeration... the Autcraft community is saving lives.

If you'd like to support the server, or read more on what we're doing, check out

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So my son says to me "Dad, I think I broke my lip bone" and I was all like...
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Tonight one of our newest admins on +Autcraft crashed the server and we all celebrated. Why? We believe that crashing the server is the last right of passage, the last step of initiation before truly being considered a full fledged admin.

It's not that we want it to happen, we are just very much aware that it's going to. We're all human and we all makes mistakes. The people who have the most power in a certain place have the potential to make the biggest mistakes in that place.

You can choose to feel bad about it, or guilty, or angry or even freak out about it but I choose to celebrate it.

We're all human. We all make mistakes. We restart the server and move on.

Enjoy your mistakes while you're alive to make them.

It's a right of passage.

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"Trust me, I'm a Doctor."

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Wow... after 146 years, Ringling Bros. Circus to end in May.

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"Children who believe they are transgender 'could have autism', says controversial expert"

Ok so... it's not that this guy is wrong that it angers me, it's that he has it backwards. Here is what it should say:

"Children who have autism are more likely to believe they are transgender."

Do you see the difference?

Let me explain. Keep in mind that these will be generalizations so when I say "children with autism", in your head, think "many people," not "all."

Disconnect from Societal "Norms"

Children with autism are already largely disconnected from the rest of society. That is to say, they tend to feel like an outsider. But this isn't just isolated to small talk and social situations. For many people with autism, "norms" are anything but normal. We understand that My Little Pony is geared towards girls but don't really get why boys should be embarrassed or teased about liking them.

So with this disconnect, children with autism are already resistant to the programming or brainwashing that comes at them from all directions since birth. The "little princess" comments for girls, the "boys will be boys" comments for boys and so forth. When you really think about it, boys are programmed to be boys and girls are programmed to be girls from birth onward... they're not encouraged to think as just a child so much as a specifically gendered child. Autistic children don't generally think this way no matter how much outside sources try to force them to.

This means that they grow up feeling more like how they truly feel rather than how they think they are supposed to feel based on societal input.

Disconnect between mind and body

Secondly, having autism causes a disconnect within oneself just as much as a disconnect with everyone else. That is to say, our minds don't have the same relationship with our body as most other people might. Hygiene doesn't hold the same priority. What we look like to others doesn't hold the same importance.
You don't generally hear autistic people say is "I know it like the back of my hand" because we typically don't have a clue what the back of our hand looks like. It's not important to us, it serves no purpose knowing and so it takes up no space in our memory. We look in the mirror less, we look our own bodies less. We spend less time worrying about it.

This disconnect does serve one great purpose... when our mind is separate from our body, we're more free to recognize that our body isn't the right body. When we think and feel in the way a specific gender thinks and feels, and we look down and see we are not that gender, we recognize the problem.


All of this is actually remarkable to think about because if you look back 20, 50, 100 or more years... this just didn't happen. Even so little as 20 years ago, most people weren't even being diagnosed with autism simply because there wasn't enough experts that could recognize it much less diagnose it.

To think about being gay or gender fluid or gender neutral... it wasn't very many years ago where, if you weren't straight... then... tough! You basically never told anyone because no one else ever did and even if you did, there was nothing you could do about it. There certainly weren't any sex change operations to speak of.

But today, anyone not feeling they truly belong in their own skin can see other people that are famous or friends or even family who are embracing who they are even if it means going through a sex change procedure. They see those people and then look at themselves and finally understand what they've been feeling! They look at those people who are doing something about it and they realize that they can do something about it too! That's powerful.

Back to that opening statement

So this guy in this article, he has it backwards. But even my own adjustment to his statement isn't entirely accurate. You see, I believe a lot of people, whether autistic or not, are gay, or gender fluid, or gender neutral or transgender... it's just that autistic people could be more likely to recognize that, or at least recognize it sooner, simply due to their mind/body disconnect and the fact that they're less likely to be programmed into social norms.

It's not that autistic people are more likely to be LGBTQ, it's that they're more likely to recognize it and believe it and admit it.

When you think of it in those terms, this is a good thing. A very good thing. Because now is the time when the technology and the information and the freedom is available to truly be who they were meant to be.

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You know, we like to think that we've become this great society, so advanced, so far from our barbaric, primitive ancestry... but nope. We might have super computers in our pockets but as a species, we still have so very far to go.

I know, not all humans are like this. But honestly, with the school shootings, wars, mass murders, blatant racism and monsters like the four people who did this?

Faith in humanity is fleeting.

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Did 2016 also kill #autism blogs? Why? And what's next?

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I just got an email from a player on the Autcraft server with a screenshot of 9 double chests at his base.

In the email was the offer/ultimatum that I must trade him the rarest item on my server for what he has in those 9 double chests or else he may leave the server forever.

So basically what he's saying is, if I give him that item, I get his stuff and if I don't, he leaves and I get his stuff.
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