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John Jamele
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28 followers
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I am not a good person, which is why I'm going to keep picking on this Verizon Fios thing
Hey look everybody, it's the squishy blob of protoplasm currently employed as a spokesomething by Verizon Fios!  Seriously, though, I don't like being mean- but what the hell is WITH this kid? It's bad enough that he sounds like he's sucking on marbles and ...

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More fun from the Verizon Fios Gnome
Seriously, this creepy kid is devoting his entire life to judging other people's online entertainment equipment?  WTF is that all about? How much is Verizon Fios paying him to be the most annoying, nosy little brat in the neighborhood? He's so freaking obno...
More fun from the Verizon Fios Gnome
More fun from the Verizon Fios Gnome
thecommercialcurmudgeon.com

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This Edward Jones Investment Woman sure knows how to reel in the next generation
So this thirtysomething guy walks into an Edward Jones Brokerage office to meet with the woman who has been handling his parents' money for years.  The parents have been talking to her for years about their son, no doubt mentioning on more than one ocassion...

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Oh seriously bite me, Mazda
If the last frame of this noxious dumpster fire of an ad doesn't leave you wanting to punch someone, you are much more tolerant, calm person than I am.  Because I didn't just want to punch the guy spreading his arms out in a "I own the universe 'cause check...
Oh seriously bite me, Mazda
Oh seriously bite me, Mazda
thecommercialcurmudgeon.com

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Dunkin Donuts Commercials are FUNNY! REALLY!
See, it's FUNNY because the disgusting coworker reached out and took food right out of the hand of the food's owner and ate it and proclaimed it good!  The disgusting coworker clearly dominates the office- he's probably the mentally ill son of the boss.  I ...

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Toxic, Unfunny Sexism from DirecTV
I guess it's supposed to be funny that this insane woman is throwing her boyfriend's belongings out the window, being a total jackass in front of an entire neighborhood which is really really wishing that it was HER who was being evicted because they are si...
Toxic, Unfunny Sexism from DirecTV
Toxic, Unfunny Sexism from DirecTV
thecommercialcurmudgeon.com

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Chevy's "Real People, Not Actors" tragic outtake
I could have spent an entire post complaining about the monstrosity of an LA house this SUV is parked in front of.  Seriously, what the hell- is that George Lucas' house, or what?  Who lives here?  Why did we come here to make this ad?  What the serious hel...

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Hey Google, Who's Making Who Here?
My original take on this commercial along the lines of another "ugh we are becoming more and more helpless and dependent on this stupid technology by the second."  It worked better with the long (tv)  version, which includes a woman almost killing herself i...
Hey Google, Who's Making Who Here?
Hey Google, Who's Making Who Here?
thecommercialcurmudgeon.com

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Do Super Beta Prostate pills come with steak knives or hearing aids?
I'm dealing with the radio verson of this commercial on XM Classic Radio every few minutes, so now you have to too.  You're welcome. The radio version really targets the middle-aged, asking again and again if they're "frustrated" that they have to "pee so o...

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"Life Awaits?" LIFE AWAITS????
Rage....rising..... Seriously, stop showing me this crap on tv, please.  The LAST thing I really need in my life right now is ads featuring grinning, already-have-pretty-much-everything millenials checking out the benefits of a g-d d--ned "Liferoom."  You k...
"Life Awaits?" LIFE AWAITS????
"Life Awaits?" LIFE AWAITS????
thecommercialcurmudgeon.com
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