Profile cover photo
Profile photo
Catholic ADHD Coach
34 followers -
ADHD Advocate, Coach, Educator
ADHD Advocate, Coach, Educator

34 followers
About
Posts

It's all just mundane and boring. Do you ever feel that way? It's how the "norms" live. We have to remember that our drive to be excited all of the time is abnormal. We thrive on adrenalin to compensate for the insufficient or abnormal use of dopamine, and serotonin by our neuro-system. The result is a need to chase stimulus all of the time. How do you stim chase? Some stim chase can be positive however we must be aware of those times where we complicate our lives by feeding the beast. The effect of wrong stim chasing is the failure of whatever the issue. Job changes, affairs, addiction and picking fights with loved ones are all places that stim chasing fails us. The outcome is a blow to our self-esteem. People with ADHD that has been un-managed for any length of time tend to have lower self-esteem than others. Self confidence is not the same as self-esteem instead it's the general positive feeling of self. Maybe routine and stability are good things just ask a norm. For the rest of us stick to safely executing extreme sports to catch all the stim. you need.
Add a comment...

I read a blog today from a spouse of a person with ADHD. She had the normal complaints regarding her husband and his lack of personal responsibility regarding his “tantrums” as well as his refusal to apologize for outbursts. She says “he says apologizing is like apologizing for who he is.” Her initial response was due to an article she read about not punishing behavior of children with ADHD. 

As the Catholic ADHD Coach I tend to avoid the idea that we need to choose the right spouse. Some ADHD books start with the idea that people with ADHD need to pick a spouse correctly because we are likely to choose a spouse for the wrong reason in the first place. I prefer to accept that what God created can’t be undone by man. It’s my belief and yet Catholic numbers for divorce are just slightly lower than society on a whole. 

What I prefer to concentrate on is actual treatment of the person with ADHD. Most of us know something about ADHD and we then dismiss or accept but rarely do we actively treat. Less than 1% of people diagnosed seek treatment. I don’t mean adjusting the diet and discovering that certain stars and business personalities have ADHD and so I’m fine. I’m talking about treatment like the multi-modal approach I have talked about before. 

If we look at the wife above, she is right. And it gets really difficult, no matter how patient, for the spouse to continually accept behavior. As adults with ADHD we have adapted and created management tools to get us to where we need to be. Sometimes those tools only help us and don’t present a huge amount of care for others. If her husband were coached he could bring this issue to the table. Having ADHD is not a hall pass. With proper treatment we can learn new ways to cope using medication, exercise, coaching and psychological support, when needed, to identify when we are just wrong and then accept that. 

Easter is approaching and forgiveness should be on our hearts. We are forgiven by our Savior and we are expected to forgive ourselves so we can then forgive the ones who love us. 
If you have survived a life of untreated ADHD, you know what I mean so take the time to apologize. We often are not aware of our actions or there affect on others so accept it if they say they are hurt or disappointed. Then accept that ADHD is a mental disorder which requires specific treatment which will allow you to identify abnormal behavior and change it.
Add a comment...

I read a blog today from a spouse of a person with ADHD. She had the normal complaints regarding her husband and his lack of personal responsibility regarding his “tantrums” as well as his refusal to apologize for outbursts. She says “he says apologizing is like apologizing for who he is.” Her initial response was due to an article she read about not punishing behavior of children with ADHD. 

As the Catholic ADHD Coach I tend to avoid the idea that we need to choose the right spouse. Some ADHD books start with the idea that people with ADHD need to pick a spouse correctly because we are likely to choose a spouse for the wrong reason in the first place. I prefer to accept that what God created can’t be undone by man. It’s my belief and yet Catholic numbers for divorce are just slightly lower than society on a whole. 

What I prefer to concentrate on is actual treatment of the person with ADHD. Most of us know something about ADHD and we then dismiss or accept but rarely do we actively treat. Less than 1% of people diagnosed seek treatment. I don’t mean adjusting the diet and discovering that certain stars and business personalities have ADHD and so I’m fine. I’m talking about treatment like the multi-modal approach I have talked about before. 

If we look at the wife above, she is right. And it gets really difficult, no matter how patient, for the spouse to continually accept behavior. As adults with ADHD we have adapted and created management tools to get us to where we need to be. Sometimes those tools only help us and don’t present a huge amount of care for others. If her husband were coached he could bring this issue to the table. Having ADHD is not a hall pass. With proper treatment we can learn new ways to cope using medication, exercise, coaching and psychological support, when needed, to identify when we are just wrong and then accept that. 

Easter is approaching and forgiveness should be on our hearts. We are forgiven by our Savior and we are expected to forgive ourselves so we can then forgive the ones who love us. 
If you have survived a life of untreated ADHD, you know what I mean so take the time to apologize. We often are not aware of our actions or there affect on others so accept it if they say they are hurt or disappointed. Then accept that ADHD is a mental disorder which requires specific treatment which will allow you to identify abnormal behavior and change it.
Add a comment...

Post has attachment
Add a comment...

ADHD is not merely a behavioral disorder. A key term that you need to understand is executive function. A simple way to understand it is like a CPU on a computer. The CPU tells the RAM and the hard drive on a computer what to access and in what order. It does this at speeds that are hard to comprehend. The pre-frontal cortex (PFC) is the CPU in our brain. If you think a computer is fast, the brain is un-clockable in speed. When the PFC is not working, the instructions get lost. Little things don’t get stored in normal places like where to store someone’s name, or the act of filtering out statements that should be made from those that should not. When I’m coaching I educate people on all facets of the disorder and this is the type of information that is covered. I hope it helps.
Add a comment...
Wait while more posts are being loaded