About a decade ago I met this guy who I thought was intoxicating. Turns out I was wrong by a few syllables. He was just plain ol’ toxic. Let’s call him Tox to protect his identity.
Even though I knew Tox was a lethal combo of Trouble and Troubled, when we broke up I felt as if my Plan A Life had been pulled out from under me. I had a rough time envisioning how a Plan B storyline could ever rock.
So I healed myself by taking over the storyline. I decided to write a memoir about our challenging relationship – and I knew the ending of my life story in advance.
Spoiler Alert: I knew my memoir needed to have a happy ending.
Of course I was writing the memoir at a time when I was sad and alone – with no happy ending anywhere near sight. Nonetheless I was determined to transform my sad little story into a hugely inspiring Lifetime Movie Of The Week kind of adventure – whereby ultimately the lead character (me!) becomes stronger and happier thanks to all the challenges which she (me!) went through.
With this happy ending top of mind, I began writing my memoir about Tox and me. I started at the beginning – when we first met and fell in love. I planted “red flags” in the storyline – the ones which I had noticed – but ignored. I laughed to myself as I wrote these chapters – wondering if the reader would be catching these “red flags” and yelling at the lead protagonist (me!) for ignoring them. For this reason I began writing some of my backstory – to explain to the reader why and how I had ignored those red flags. I found writing my “back story” very therapeutic. My mood and spirit began to rise.
Another therapeutic benefit to writing my memoir…
I found I was waking up in the morning curious about what would happen to me in that given day – wondering what fateful events might lead me to the happy ending which I was insistent my storyline would include.
I’d bump into an old work colleague or meet a stranger at a coffee shop and wonder: Might this person become an important character in my memoir – someone who leads me to my happy ending?
Even “bad things” automatically showed up as “good things.”
I’d miss a train and wonder: Was I supposed to miss this train? Is this an important plot point in my memoir? Am I supposed to go on the next train – because I’m meant to meet someone special on the next train – someone who’s very important to my memoir’s storyline?
In fact, I discovered so many positive therapeutic benefits in writing my memoir that I began recommending “Memoir Therapy” to both friends and clients.
CLICK to read my top 5 tools for “Memoir Therapy” – so you too can write your way to a happier life!