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Terri Dickinson
28 followers -
You have to play the hand you're delt
You have to play the hand you're delt

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A few months later!
i haven't wrote for a while so I'm just gonna do a little update :)  I just wanna write about the past few months and how things have changed. Firstly my anxiety and depression has impoved a lot although very slowly. My anxiety attacks have become less and ...
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So this is my finished song. All comments welcome as always I love to know what you guys think :)

STUCK IN LOVE.

Yesterday was hard, i just couldn't stop the pain, I was weak, I caved, i cut myself again, as I felt the blood, slipping out my veins, I felt calm inside, all my anger slipped away, I forgot you, I forgot my broken heart, I forgot that you controlled me right from the very start. I was young when I met you, I was only twenty one, I fell in love with your smile and the fact that you were strong, you had battled all your demons and you just weren't like the rest, you were weird and crazy but I liked those bits the best. you taught me that no person, will ever be the same, but you also learnt me, that love is just a game and I'm grateful, for everything you done, my saviour, my world, my fucking number one, you say that I cheated but you've never been more wrong! I felt neglected, you made me feel unloved I was going through some shit as well as the above, you didn't want me, you kicked me to the curb, you know you had a choice and you choose the fucking herb, I reached out, all I needed was a friend, I couldn't stop the tears from falling, I just wanted it to end. Ill admit it was wrong and all the blame ill take, but believe me when I say, I learnt from that mistake, but now you hate me, your love for me is dead and every word you ever said, keeps spinning in my head, I can't escape them, my demons think its great, my anxiety feeds off all the fucking hate, its too late, you've already moved on, and my days of trying to save us are well and truly gone but please remember your different from the rest, your unique and crazy you deserve the fucking best

Love hurts baby and moving on is crazy but what else can I do, I can't stay here stuck loving you
I've had hate in my heart since you tore my world apart but what else can I do, I can't stay here stuck loving you

I don't know why I feel like this, I don't know why your such a miss, after everything you've put me through, why cant I get over you, yeah I done wrong but so did you, we both done things that we knew we shouldn't do, why cant we just be together, it should of been me and you forever, I'll take the blame if that's what it takes, I'll own up to every mistake, that i made when you weren't around, when you left me crying on the cold hard ground, after 3 years your love just died, but at least i can say that i tried, to show you what you ment to me, the stuff that your to blind to see but you've moved on and found someone new, your doing things you would never normally do, while I'm here with a broken heart, struggling to breathe and falling apart, there's nothing anyone can say, to take this aching pain away, it feels like my chest is caving in, sadness is eating me deep within, i think I've i cried a million tears, my head is filled with my worst fears but although this is very hard to say, I wish you luck at the end of the day!

Love hurts baby and moving on is crazy but what else can I do, I can't stay here stuck loving you
I've had hate in my heart since you tore my world apart but what else can I do, I can't stay here stuck loving you

Theres so much shit in my brain, that woman she drives me insane, the sleeping pills have no effect, there was no love, just neglect, she turned out evil to the core, stripped down my soul till it was raw, cant believe that she was my wish, that evil narcissistic bitch, wanted me to follow her rules like she was my teacher at school, she would flip at the drop of a hat, throw in a few puches, some slaps, i couldnt do anything right, could barely breathe without a fight, she kicked me down in the dirt, i love her so much it hurts, we all have a dark side deep down that most of us disguise with a crown its only when the halo slips, we get to see the chains and the whips, they've already got you on side so theres no more reasons to hide the devil inside of their soul thats buried deep down like a mole and theres no way to escape, love has already started to overtake, she grinds you into the ground your scared you'll never be found, she turns the truth into lies, slowly your faith and hope dies, theres nothing left just a shell, you survived three years of this hell, its time for you to be strong, pick up your pieces, move on

Love hurts baby and moving on is crazy but what else can I do, I can't stay here stuck loving you
I've had hate in my heart since you tore my world apart but what else can I do, I can't stay here stuck loving you

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So yeah my friends are funny as fuck!
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Last night i done something I now regret, I always said i would never bring myself down to your level but I did because I just want to feel love again, I wanted to feel special, I wanted to forget all the pain, everything you put me though, the control, the hitting, putting me down, making me feel worthless, not even attempting to understand me, last night one person told me she liked me and the other told me she loved me and all i could think about was how you would feel, how pissed off you would be and how much you would hate me but why? Your not feeling like that while doing whatever with Tyler ffs you got him to email me and then let him answer your phone and it was all purely to hurt me you've messed me up so bad that neither of them people even stand a chance and its sad because there both really good people and i know they would treat me like a queen but for some fucked up reason, I still want you, I want the drama and the hate, the destruction, the hurt and all your fucked fuckedupnes. You've stole my heart and I want it back
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I don't know why I feel like this, I don't know why your such a miss, after everything you've put me through, why cant I get over you, yeah I done wrong but so did you, we both done things that we knew we shouldn't do, why cant we just be together, it should of been me and you forever, I'll take the blame if that's what it takes, I'll own up to every mistake, that i made when you weren't around, when you left me crying on the cold hard ground, after 3 years your love just died, but at least i can say that i tried, to show you what you ment to me, the stuff that your to blind to see but you've moved on and found someone new, your doing things you would never normally do, while I'm here with a broken heart, struggling to breathe and falling apart, there's nothing anyone can say, to take this aching pain away, it feels like my chest is caving in, sadness is eating me deep within, i think I've i cried a million tears, my head is filled with my worst fears but although this is very hard to say, I wish you luck at the end of the day!

Girls are such hard work I've only been single 4 weeks, feelings don't just die. Back the fuck off man!
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I don't know why I feel like this, I don't know why your such a miss, after everything you've put me through, why cant I get over you, yeah I done wrong but so did you, we both done things that we knew we shouldn't do, why cant we just be together, it should of been me and you forever, I'll take the blame if that's what it takes, I'll own up to every mistake, that i made when you weren't around, when you left me crying on the cold hard ground, after 3 years your love just died, but at least i can say that i tried, to show you what you ment to me, the stuff that your to blind to see but you've moved on and found someone new, your doing things you would never normally do, while I'm here with a broken heart, struggling to breathe and falling apart, there's nothing anyone can say, to take this aching pain away, it feels like my chest is caving in, sadness is eating me deep within, i think I've i cried a million tears, my head is filled with my worst fears but although this is very hard to say, I wish you luck at the end of the day!
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Again :)
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