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Pinkatron “SparklePants” 2000
1,960 followers -
What geekery is this?
What geekery is this?

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Todays makeup: a touch of bright yellow on the inner corners, green on the lid and pink in the crease with a fan of white on brow bones. Long lasting lip stain: stilla, eyelashes: great lash waterproof
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Alas. The acrylic on my left hand pinkie broke. Almost 3 weeks since I had them done though, and haven't the money yet for refill and fix, so that's not bad at all.

Still sad though. :(
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Public service announcement: you CAN fry chicken in Olive oil, and almond flour tastes fine for crispy goodness. The key is making sure the oil stays a constant 350, no higher or you'll smoke yourself out.... And not in a good way.
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I snuck in some green for first day makeup
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cat.exe has encountered an error.
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Ground oatmeal, green tea and coconut oil mask. With a book. Sexy af and as the fellow kids day, lit fam 💯💯💯💯💯
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Keto/ very low carb eggy bread, a review.

Taste: A hint of really, really good, not dry corn bread, with a lot of egg flavor. Corn bread with scrambled egg, almost, or a french toast (without the syrup) flavor. The consistency is exactly like really good, thick corn bread made with very fine cornmeal OR a slightly drier banana bread (without an sweetness.) It does not in anyway, shape or form taste like almonds.

The addition of chia seeds did not effect the flavor what so ever. In fact, zero chia seed flavor and no chia seeds getting stuck in my teeth or crunching weirdly.

IF you do not like fried, scrambled, eggs in general or are a vegetarian, then I don't think this will work for you.

The ORIGINAL recipe ingredients:

1/2 cup butter, melted
2 tablespoons Coconut Oil
7 50 g eggs
1 teaspoon baking powder
2 cups Almond flour
1/2 teaspoon xanthan gum (thickener)
1/2 teaspoon salt.
Baking/parchment paper for liner

MEL's ADJUSTMENT ingredients:
1/2 cup butter, melted
2 tablespoons coconut oil
6 extra large publix brand eggs
2 cups Almond flour
1/2 tablespoon dry chia seeds, soaked in 4 tablespoons warm water
1 teaspoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt.
Baking parchment paper for lining

Instructions:

1. Preheat your oven to 355.
2. XANTHAN GUM SUBSTITUTE (because I did not have any nor did Publix). Ready 1/2 tablespoon or dark or whole chia seeds with 2-4 tablespoons of warm water. This will turn the chia seeds into a gel like consistency, which will help thicken and pull the batter together. IF YOU HAVE XANTHAN GUM, IGNORE
3. In a separate bowl, mix your dry ingredients with a fork or yo fingers no judgement: 2 cups of Almond flour, 1/2 teaspoon salt and 1 teaspoon baking powder and xanthan gum if you have it.
4. In another bowl, crack your 6 extra large, or 7 normal eggs. Beat, on high, for 1-2 minutes.
5. Mix your coconut oil into your melted butter.
6. Turn beaters on low and slowly mix butter and coconut oil. Add your chia seeds if using chia seeds.
7. Slowly introduce the dry ingredients to the wet. Because the eggs are shy and prone to get overwhelmed if introduced to too many flours at once.
8. Line your pan with baking parchment, and pour your batter.
9. If you care about whether the top of your bread is raggedy or not, smooth it down. If not. Never mind, do your thing.

DEPENDING ON YOUR BREAD PAN
Metal: If you are baking your bread in a bread pan, cook on 350 for 45 minutes. At the 35 minute mark, shove a toothpick, fork, or wooden skewer in the center. If it comes away clean, you are ready. If not, let cook for 10 additional minutes but keep a good eye on your eggy bread.

Glass bread pan: Glass retains heat longer, so consider either dropping the temp or cooking it for 35 mins instead of 45. Again, stabbing it will probably be the best way to ensure its cooked.

BOTTOM LINE:
I like it. I can see this making a fantastic chili dog 'bun', sandwich bread, etc. I have not tried it toasted yet, so no idea how it holds up.

ORIGINAL RECIPE: https://www.fatforweightloss.com.au/recipe/keto-bread/
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7/13/18
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My house is a mess. I am declaring a self care day anyway. That very low carb bread is in the oven, we shall see how it does! It has A LOT of eggs in it, so it isn't vegetarian. It called for 7, but I had extra large, so I used six.

I am also going to grind some oatmeal and green tea into fine powder, I think, so I can use it with coconut oil and have myself a 15 minute mask, after having a very long shower, possibly with a quick home made sugar scrub, and watching ASMR while reading.

Happy Friday!
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I have been informed by my husband to avoid #twitter today due to the fact that I can't watch my favorite D&D stream, Critical Role, until Fridays, day after they go live, and there is a shit storm of angry people spoiling it left right and center and mostly just being trash bags of humanity.

Come. On. #Critters . We are better than that.
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