Y’know, regardless if I’m pregnant or not… you fucking idiots are just as retarded as I am for even giving a shit about it in the first place.

I was denied entry to three different community colleges, I literally have no idea who Thomas Jefferson was. Yet there you are, clicking away at people.com, checking in on what I got my weight down to and just how orange my boyfriend’s skin tone is.

Even if I do have a baby, there is a 75% chance that I’m going to mistakenly leave it behind in the gifting suite of the MTV Movie Awards.

This is the kind of stupidity that I am capable of.

Still, you’ll be glued to your television screen or computer monitor just to see what the vacant assholes at TMZ have to say about it.

I need to constantly check my look in the mirror to make sure that my guidette bump isn’t growing back (I had to have it surgically removed to make me look more classy-like). Maybe you should be taking a look in the mirror for different reasons altogether.
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