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Narcissistic Behaviour
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Exploring Narcissistic Behaviour And Its Effects On Victims
Exploring Narcissistic Behaviour And Its Effects On Victims

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The Narcissists mantra:  "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?, DO YOU?.......WHY DON'T YOU GOOGLE ME AND SEE HOW IMPORTANT I AM"
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When it comes to a narcissist...... did you listen to your instinct?
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The Narcissist's use of Gaslighting Behaviour:
What this post highlights is that victims of narcissistic abuse almost always end up trying to unscramble their confused reality once they are in a relationship with a narcissist. Please do not think that this means that there is something wrong with you. This has happened as a result of the "Gaslighting" behaviour that the narcissist dished out on you.

Everybody needs to understand that the narcissist uses psychological abuse by way of hidden manipulation in order to control others, and believe it when I say that most people never work out the extent of the manipulation.
The gaslighting behaviour instills in the victim an extreme sense of anxiety and confusion, often to the point where they no longer trust their own memory, perception or judgment. That is why it is such a dangerous form of abuse.

The effects of gaslighting can leave you constantly second-guessing yourself. Your self-esteem and confidence is eroded, sometimes to the point that you no longer feel "good enough". You begin to doubt yourself and your decision making. Even though you know something is wrong, you just cannot figure out what it is, so you find yourself always walking on eggshells around your narcissistic abuser.

Everybody needs to be aware of this kind of behaviour, because it is rampant whenever one is in a relationship with a narcissist, (whether it is in the home, the workplace, the bedroom, the boardroom etc). The only way to recognize this gaslighting behaviour is to find out as much as you can about the subject. Once you are informed, you will spot the manipulation instantly whenever you see it happen.

You can Inform yourself by Googleing the term Gaslighting. There is plenty of good articles written on the web, or if you would care to read it, I have written an article on the subject that may get you started. All my information on my site is about narcissistic behaviour, and the effects of that behaviour on the victim, and it is absolutely free. You can see it at:
http://narcissisticbehavior.net/category/the-effects-of-gaslighting-in-narcissistic-victim-syndrome  

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The Covert Narcissist:
So much is written about the Overt Narcissist, but little about the Covert Narcissist. You would be surprised as to how few people are aware of this form of narcissism, even therapists. For that reason many families suffer without any form of support or help. And for those family members who end up going to therapy, they are often failed again, because their therapist may not be trained to recognise the symptoms of narcissistic abuse. This particular type of abuse is now recognized as a new syndrome that is coined Narcissistic Victim Syndrome.

I came through a childhood with such a sybling who created havoc with his narcissistic behavior and rages. I was probably his first victim. As he got older, his behavior became even more distructive. He made his family's life a misery, they were actually living in a hell that could only be described as a "war zone". The problem is, in order to survive, the victim enters into what is termed the "the narcissists dance". This is an unconscious defense mechanism which helps to keep the victim safe, but in so doing they almost loose themselves by placating, complying, and appeasing. This becomes part of their way of being, a great pleaser with everybody. Unless this unconscious dance is exposed in therapy, and the victim educated about narcissistic behavior, they are actually left vunerable to becoming Narcissistic Supply yet again. The reason is that they are conditioned (like Pavlov's dogs)in a way that makes them a a target for other hungry narcissists, who are always on the hunt for new supply, and are quick to spot those primed already.

The narcissistic epidemic has infiltrated into every aspect of modern life. The narcissistic personality traits can be found in every strata of society, with a marked shift especially amongst the normal population, and in the numbers of women presenting with narcissistic behaviours. For that reason it is vital that therapists educate and familiarize themselves with all that is involved in narcissistic behaviours so that they can recognize the destruction and long-term consequences that is inflicted on society at large.

To know more about the difference between the Overt Narcissist and the Covert Narcissist click on the article below which will bring you to my site The Roadshow for Therapists

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WHAT IS NARCISSISM?
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EXPLORING THE EFFECTS OF NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ON VICTIMS:
I am glad to see so many people are educating themselves on the subject of narcissistic abuse.  I would advise anyone who has been unfortunate to have been a victim of narcissistic abuse to learn how to "spot a narcissist" in order to protect oneself from further re-victimization by another narcissist in the future. It is well documented that Narcissists has a knack for spotting those victims who have been already conditioned in their convoluted dance, and they become instantly attracted like moths to the flame, which is an irresistible and dangerous attraction that truly excites the narcissist in his hunt for narcissistic supply.

In your research of the subject, please become consciously aware of terms such as
*Stockholm Syndrome,
*Narcissistic Supply,
*Gaslighting,
*Narcissistic Victim Syndrome,
*Cognitive Dissonance,
*Narcissistic Injury,
*Infantile Regression,
*Trauma Bonding
*Narcissistic Rage
*Narcissistic Shame
Google all of these terms, because they will explain a lot of the behaviours that you may have experienced by your abuser, but also you will begin to understand the cleverness of your own survival behaviour that has served you well........ you are all survivors, and I salute you. Enjoy your study, because I guarantee that it will bring you many "Aha! moments" as you get answers to your many questions.
 

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Happy New Year everybody.  Let us try to make 2013 a time to educate others about narcissistic abuse.... that way we may manage to prevent others from becoming victims and avoid suffering.
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10 Insights to Understanding Narcissistic Personality Disorder
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