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I once had a dream I found a lightsaber in a box of fruitloops... I ran down the street slicing stuff up. That light post didn't see it coming. I woke up before it got really good, or before any accidental dismemberment. 
David Carter
  Mine would be me holding it backward as I push the button to get the light to come out. lol 
I imagine people turning it on and poking themselves in the eye.
Bet they never seen that one coming. 
you forgot to add chopping off your sons hand
if there's a way to limit the laser beam then there must be the Force as well, because both are unfortunately impossible. so I think if everything would work itself out if one were real. =)
Well if you curved space-time strongly enough the light could be bounded in a saber-like form, but then the gravity would probably be more dangerous than the lightsaber itself...
What if the laser was pulsed at 1 nanosecond intervals? The beam length would only ever be about a metre long... edit: actually that wouldn't stop beam already emitted #thoughtexperimentfail
If lightsabers are illegal, only dead criminals will have lightsabers,
nah bro, I would start a new Tree Trimming company!
If you were a Jedi, which is the only way to get a light saber you could easily tear some imperial gaurds..I disagree with the pie graph
Touch it with your tongue
Ben Sam
wait, you forgot one: Death (56%)
The coolest yet most frightening thing I'd ever own.
Make sure it's right side up when you turn it on!
Tried to explain this to my 4 year old son
I'm pretty sure the heat it would give off would make if impossible to hold.
My Note 2 makes light saber sounds when I take out the stylus 
"Not as crude as a blaster, but just as a mo
re civilized time"
To use a lightsaber, the force one must have.
that's actually a decent chance of saving the galaxy when you think about it.
I do not like the spirit but like the lovely body with life.
I would tell you guys how to make one but a nut case might read this and then we would really be in trouble

Or you would sue me after something went wrong
Purple is breast, but how about orange or yellow
Its good thing I have a AD&D insurance.. GIMMIE THE LIGHTSABER!!
Does that mean that I have to estimate the length of the ceiling above me before using my purple lightsaber
I would do something stupid and cut things apart
lol thats funny I like your graph
I would probably save the world from poverty, and maybe become a ruthess kill
real funny, but i would love to have one, as long as its runs on regular alkaline battery
yeah that would better the they crystals they use
If you found a real-life, honest-to-god lightsaber, why the fuck would you sell it?!
I've always wanted one for landscaping and cutting down trees.
Have yet to obtain a crystal for mine.....
Sean K
ha! that is hilarious, great idea!
HAHA, say goodbye to my legs....
Just like The Chainsaw,but way much more lethal lol ! 
Yeah. Saving the galaxy seems like a stretch.
So you're saying there's a chance I could save the galaxy?
If you are a Buffalo Light Saber of the NHL, the pie chart would be 100% sitting on your ass.
Game On jerks!
They can replace those dangerous meat and finger slicers in a deli. Can also eliminate those pesky customers that complain that the ham isn't sliced thin enough. A two-fer.
Of all the possible outcomes, I would just bring it to comiccon, and be a boss!
How much of the pie will do light saber eye surgery and unwanted hair removal.
What could Santa Claus do with a light saber?
Accidental reindeer dismemberment?
The force is off the scale strong in Santa.
Santa versus Jedi. Who prevails?
Santa kicks or cuts off the Jedi's ass.
Santa is my hero!
Whoever thought sh is lonly shld indicate 
David Carter "bet they never seen thay one coming"
They wouldn't see that after it left! Lol
I wish I had a Darf Vader doll that they sold when the movie came out...collectors pay up to 20 thousand $ for one still in the box!
Use it without force, you can't. 
^ Tell that to General Grievous.
Lightsabers exist!I saw Skywalker and many others already use it!
Purple equals mass accidental suicides

My wife would truly be in the shit, and so would my misbehaving kids for that matter!
It would be a case of 'right time for bed now' and then out comes the lightsaber...
i m in love with u afyter reading this thought
One does not simply own a lightsaber without becoming a padawan first. 
It will be a great tool to kill others by accident 
DC : - Is the light blue house mine?  jesus - didn't recognize it without the bugatti.  GRD
Become a master in finely cutting vegetables: 1%.
Don't use a light saber to play with your cat! It is NOT a laser pointer anyway!
Well, either way, may the force be with you I guess.
The French government could replace those old high maintenance guillotines.
Does anyone know if a light saber tickles the hairs on your neck?
New Christmas toy to replace the Johnny Walker Red Danger Ranger bee bee gun?
Moms all over will say,"You're going to cut a head off with that thing,"
Really? If I ever get one of those, I'll offer it to my enemies as a peace offering. I'll just swing by and pick it up later..... Along with their disembodied head! Mwwwwaaahahaha
I'll bet the battery would be heavy for one of those suckers!
lol @ jedeye but I dont think it would take batteries !
After becoming a ruthless killer and save the galaxy, I'd sell it with one hand!
Ryan Ng
i'd become a ruthless killer
I would kill myself trying to sleep with it :(
Ryan Ng
I will sell it.
Whooops there goes a limb lol
i woukd probably become a ruthless killer or sell it that or id lose a foot messsing with it
"Mom i need a new lightsaber",said the kid. "You also need 2 arms and $2,000."
So funny! I do believe many more people would Save the Galaxy, however.
1st thing Luke does when Kenobi gives it to him? looks right into the top of it. that could've ended very badly.
"Mom me and the dog were playing Star Wars, and lets say he wont wake up."
Ryan Ng
"Mom, you know the real lightsaber you gave me for my birthday? Well I sold it on eBay."
Plus, let's not forget it's a lot more unforgiving with furniture than that light, plastic substitute from Toys-R-us.
I'm betting some of it wouldn't even be accidental.  There would be at least a few people out there curious enough to graze the tip of the 'saber against their forearm just to see what it does.

And one of their friends would be encouraging from the sidelines..."c'mon...JUST THE TIP!"
My first real LOL this morning. Great share, thanks!
It's the same problem with those battery powered BBQ fire lighters. They can remove your fringe, eyebrows, facial hair, and nose hair.
Ryan Ng
Used it as an actual lightsaber, mutilated himself
funny as hell.... immediate, accidental self-dismemberment.  bwahahaha!
get a stick and put some LED lights in it and some lava around it( just imagine the lava doesnt burn the stick but burns everything else) then cover it with some plastic and their you have it , a syupidly designed homemade (i guess it would only be homemade if you have lava in your house) fully functional , multi purpose LIGHTSABER 
Forget the laser pointer...everyone is going to pay attention in my next presentation!
What about "tries to deflect bullets"???
A lightsaber should be used to cut galactic starships [epic music in the background] and sith and lords and ..... And uhhhmm {music stops} potatoes i guess
Wow its amazing what the human brain can come up with
came down with a case of darth vaders revenge, thankfully whilst on the loo the force was with me LOL!
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