Aye, Jesus's final sermon in the book of Matthew basically consisted of the following paraphrase:
"Okay guys, if you haven't listened to a single thing I've said in the preceding 1000 pages, listen to this. Take care of the poor and sick! No, seriously, I mean it. Pretend they're me if you need to. If that's not enough then ummm my pops will barbeque you if you don't, yeah that's right, crispy crunchy. No, guys, really... stop worrying about the gay guy, look over here <snap> <snap> Take care of the poor. Nope, nope, don't worry about money just take care of the poor the best you can. I really can't stress this enough."
The religious right has helpfully provided this modern translation:
"Food stamps are bad. Medicare is bad, except that part where the drug companies get free tax money. Welfare is bad, as is everyone on it. Universal healthcare is evil and should be fought as if fighting the armies of Satan himself. Everyone should only worry about himself... charity is more of a guideline than a rule. The most important political concerns of our religion are abortion, birth control, boys kissing boys, and prayer in schools. Make sure you put your cash in the plate. Don't worry we'll make sure it goes to those who need it... ish"