Profile

Cover photo
Kristie Dahlia Home
Worked at Kristie Dahlia Home Healing Arts
Attended Sarah Lawrence College
Lives in San Francisco, California
132 followers|54,079 views
AboutPostsPhotosVideos

Stream

Kristie Dahlia Home

commented on a post on Blogger.
Shared publicly  - 
 
This one might be my favorite post yet. 
1
Add a comment...

Kristie Dahlia Home

commented on a post on Blogger.
Shared publicly  - 
 
I love you so much.
I have to tell you... There are days I feel weepy; that is, like weeping for no apparent reason. I feel that way as I write this. I begin a thought, and tears leek from my eyes. What kind of thought? Any kind. It's snowing...
1
Add a comment...

Kristie Dahlia Home

commented on a post on Blogger.
Shared publicly  - 
 
Sitting at my kitchen table with my in-laws (who I adore and would let in my house even if my darling husband had not made them my family) and almost spat coffee out my nose onto my laptop at that outhouse line. I love you, dear one. Tremendous hugs and love and speedy healing to you!
I've been thinking a lot about Christmas this week. I know, just in time, right? It hasn't replaced you-know-what as my number one think, but it has been on my mind. The thinking hasn't been about finding the perfect gifts, o...
1
Add a comment...

Kristie Dahlia Home

Shared publicly  - 
 

Registration is now open for both three and four day attendance at my annual autumn Grounding retreat, October 10/11-13. This retreat is the most healing event offered in my practice.

You do not have to walk on your knees
For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting.
You only have to let the soft animal of your body
love what it loves.

- Mary Oliver

Our yoga is nourishing, healing restorative practice; long poses in which the body lies draped over pillows and blankets in positions designed to encourage parasympathetic nervous system dominance, the body's natural healing state. Restorative yoga has been the subject of many medical research studies, and all of the results are outstanding. We do gentle practice, restorative practice, walking meditation in the redwood forest labyrinth, soak in the redwood hot tub, and dine on the exquisite food of Jennifer Lynch. I hope you will consider joining us! As ever, if you find the cost problematic, please discuss that with me personally. The teacher has to eat, but I wish for my practice to be as widely accessible as possible. If you have attended and enjoyed this retreat, I hope you might be so kind as to spread the word.

details: http://is.gd/7WyFWn
Grounding 2013: a Restorative Retreat October 10-13, 2013 at Salamander Camp. You do not have to walk on your knees. For a hundred miles through the desert, repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves. - Mary Oliver. In autumn we draw toward the hearth and ...
1
Add a comment...
In her circles
22 people
Have her in circles
132 people
James Kitzmiller's profile photo
Tracy Skolnick's profile photo
ElaAyurveda Family's profile photo
Elly Jonez's profile photo
Hossam Hamed's profile photo
Christie McGold's profile photo
Mark Welch's profile photo
Gene Gattenby's profile photo
Tristan Horn's profile photo

Kristie Dahlia Home

commented on a post on Blogger.
Shared publicly  - 
 
Dad, I love you so much. I have experienced a similar phenomenon with my relationship to endometriosis. For folks who don't know me, I am a yoga therapist of 19 years, a massage therapist, and I live with stage 4 (meaning it has pervaded my abdominal tissues extensively) endometriosis, which, while benign (in the sense of not-cancerous), is a cancer-like condition in that there is stuff growing in my belly which my body does not like and which causes many complications to my life. When my surgeon, a world-class endo specialist, first met me a few years ago he told me he was impressed by my attitude. After he cut me open and saw inside of me he sat me down and asked me sincerely "How are you doing that?!"

People tell me all the time how brave and inspiring I am. I know exactly what you mean about how weird that feels. You're just being you, right? And I'm just being me. Do I have the most constructive attitude I can manage? Yup, because: duh, what else can I do? Try to feel worse? I must try the best I can, so I do. Did I prepare the document called "If I Die" at 4am and explain in it to my husband how all my filing systems work and how to find my passwords? Of course. Have I written the letter already that is what I want him to have if I don't wake up? Yup, I did that one before the first of the four surgeries. And before surgery two, in which the 8cm "tumorific mass" in my abdomen turned out to be not ovarian cancer but my intestines knotted and scarred around my ovary, did I sneak down the the back yard so that I could sob in the dark without scaring my beloved? Yup. But most days what actually happens is just what I see in you -- remembering that Oh, yes, I am not the one person who might live forever and that someday all this will go, it makes me kiss my loved ones sincerely every day, and sing to my plants, and pause to watch the sky whenever I can.

I've been through a lot of healing. It ain't no stem cell transplant, but 4 surgeries in 7 years does wear on a girl a bit, particularly when she gets up into her 40s and the final one involves rebuilding her bladder and one of her ureters. It was a year after that last surgery until I felt myself; surgery was December 21, 2012, and this month I started to run again and have my bookkeeping current. And you know what I see when I look back over this last year? Mostly treasure. The hard parts are a set of crazy stories and adventures. That day I stuffed the sheet from the gurney in my mouth at the ER while shrieking for 14 hours solid while the pumped me full of painkillers that just made me drowse between screams? I am so proud of that day. It feels like the day I climbed Mount Everest. The three months I spent in bed because walking more than two blocks made the plastic tube running from my kidney to my bladder chafe so much that I peed blood? It seems like one long afternoon of Netflix with the cat. 

In that year I learned how much I am loved. How much I am not what I do. How resilient I am. How much I enjoy my own company. How wise my cat is, how devoted my husband is. I learned to treasure life all the more. I got used to things being simpler. I got used to having to write everything down because my body was prioritizing my healing and not my brain. I watched all of Bones, and Avatar, and a whole bunch of great Japanese anime, and CSI Miami (which for a girl who hasn't had cable since 1988 is a whole lot of watching.) 

I find that healing tiptoes and then leaps. Recently there was a leap. Suddenly I can remember 4 digit number from the bill to the checkbook. In fact, I can remember 3 of them. I feel BRILLIANT. I can work and cook dinner in the same day again. My body wants to go running! And it wasn't that I felt impaired while those things didn't happen; I just got used to it. Life was simpler and I was, mostly, grateful and content. With, you know, the bouts of fear and grief we all have. And then I got better, and better.

I look forward to sharing all of this with you, sweet love. Thank you for being in my life and my heart. I never reckoned to have so many darn parents, but it has been one of the best things about growing up to start out with a mom and a dad and end up with a mom, a dad, a stepdad, a mom-in-law, and a dad-in-law. SO MANY PARENTS. I feel so blessed. You are an angel and I can't wait to hug you on the other side. I'm sure we'll both be wearing masks and that's just great.
I know I've said this before, but it makes me uncomfortable when people mention how courageous I am to be writing about my journey through cancer. I even feel pompous saying that. Yet it happens almost every day. I run into p...
1
Add a comment...

Kristie Dahlia Home

commented on a post on Blogger.
Shared publicly  - 
 
Jim, based on my 8 years of experience working with folks with cancer, you are making the right choice by erring on the side of caution about exposure to the flu during chemo. I am so, so glad to know that you are being so careful. 

I am so sorry that my mom won't be able to join you for the trip, but it is highly likely that she can participate in the consultation. Doctors these days often use good technology to communicate with their patients. It might be possible for my mom to join your appointment by Skype or by using a speakerphone for a conference call. James and I have done the latter; the doctor's office simply gives him a number to call at the right time so he can join me. Your doctors might be okay, also, with the idea of you using your phone to record the conversation to make sure you get all the details. Me, I bring my laptop; I sit right there naked in my paper gown with my computer in my lap taking notes. I can type much faster (and more legibly) than I can handwrite, so my notes are a lot better that way.

Another great option is buddy programs, which are very common here and probably on the East Coast as well -- the hospital will put you in touch with someone with the same disease/treatment for mentoring and support. If Dana Farber does not offer this, I can see if my student who had a stem cell transplant for Multiple Myeloma at UCSF might be willing to speak with you. She's a lovely person and a writer, too. 

My prayers, love, and support all aim your way. 
Right. Now I'm just mad. I'm not irked. I'm not p.o.'d. I'm not upset. I'm Peter Finch in “Network” mad as hell and I'm not gonna take it anymore mad. Except that I am gonna take it. I have no choice and that makes me mad. No...
1
Add a comment...

Kristie Dahlia Home

commented on a post on Blogger.
Shared publicly  - 
 
Jim, I love and admire you so much. Thank you for sharing with us. I am praying for you every day. Now that I can see you have told all of our side of the family, I will be calling my in-laws tonight to let them know. How wonderful to have this place where I can point them to your own voice and experience. Deep love to you and my mama.
There are a variety of versions of the story that gives this blog its name. The pony is the constant in all of them. A man is on his way to a party when he comes across a young boy shoveling ass over tea kettle at an enormous...
1
Jim Arnold's profile photo
 
"Crap."  Did not mean to "reply as you."  How in the heck do u post as yourself???

Love,
Donna
Add a comment...
People
In her circles
22 people
Have her in circles
132 people
James Kitzmiller's profile photo
Tracy Skolnick's profile photo
ElaAyurveda Family's profile photo
Elly Jonez's profile photo
Hossam Hamed's profile photo
Christie McGold's profile photo
Mark Welch's profile photo
Gene Gattenby's profile photo
Tristan Horn's profile photo
Education
  • Sarah Lawrence College
    1992
Basic Information
Gender
Female
Relationship
Married
Work
Employment
  • Kristie Dahlia Home Healing Arts
Places
Map of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has lived
Currently
San Francisco, California