It seems that not all fat men are jolly. Yesterday I was walking down a sidewalk and this big ball of a man came ambling by. He was round enough that I thought I could push him down a snow covered hill and create the world's biggest snowball. Mind you this was a full width city sidewalk and not one of those narrow suburban walks. I did my best to avoid him, walking sideways, but our shoulders touched.
Then the row ensued.
He flipped around faster than I thought was possible for a fat man to do and inquired with a raspy voice as if he had smoked ten cartons of cigarettes that day what my problem was. His tone was not a friendly one-- I would describe it as hostile.
Calmly explaining that I did my best to avoid him as he was waddling down the middle of the sidewalk did not alleviate the tense situation. Then I appealed to the rules hoping that this hippo of a man appreciated the unspoken but holy rules of encounters.
I said, "While you have a big belly, you do not have a beard. I have a very big beard and the beard always has the right of way."
He felt shame and tried to make restitution by offering me his first born child. No deal. I just held my head up high and my beard walked me away.