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jane smith
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jane's posts

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Waste of Space and Time
Tonight I feel fundamentally flawed. Having Friends.   Having a Relationship.  Success in Work.   Going Out.   Getting Married.  Having Kids.  Getting a House. These are all things that happen to other people. I'm just one of those people who has something ...

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Back and As Much As Ever
I'm not doing well. I didn't go to work today. Although, to be fair, I was worried about my cat since he puked something nasty on my pillow and I thought he might have an intestinal blockage. Now I'm watching him to see if he poops and he has not, all day. ...

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Crashing
I'm not sure if this is going to be a coherent post. I was clearly in hypomania for at least six weeks or so; I was sped up and felt like I had caffeine in me all the time. But now I feel slow and depressed. It's hard for me to think of things when people a...

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Recovery: So What Now?
You know what's weird about recovery? Every fucking thing. If I'm not binging, or picking, or obsessing.... What the hell am I doing? It's like there's a great big hole in my life tonight. Don't get me wrong, it wasn't there yesterday and it probably won't ...

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Republican Gamers, Homophobes, and Staying Home
     I can't believe it's been three months since I last talked to those Republican Gamers. The DM did text me and asked me back over for a game night a month later but I turned it down. They have not asked again. I guess I just didn't feel like I could go ...

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I Am a Hermit, Don't Ask Me Questions
So, lately I've been doing pretty well and going about my business like a normal person. Then tonight, I'm at my friends' house playing board games and they start talking politics. It's late, and they have moved seamlessly from one topic to this one and the...

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That Serial Killer I Dated, Part Two
             A while ago I wrote a post about a man who assaulted
me on a date. I had a hard time finishing Part Two, but here it is; Part Two:              Obviously I have some things I need to work on personally
and looking back it’s easy to see the red ...

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Filling Time
Sometimes things will really hit me. Like tonight, maybe it's the super-red-moon or the fact that there's someone outside my window looking at the moon and I kinda wanted to go out and look at it too, but I saw myself in the mirror and I look like an insane...
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