Hilarious menu of Punjab restaurant in Soho, London (http://goo.gl/JoiWp - curry and lassi okay, averagely pricey).

"We must warn you our chicken curry dishes can be very addictive. They really do stimulate your endorphins and electrify your nerves. In fact, one guest dined at the Punjab twice a day, five days a week for forty years, before retiring!"

"Lamb curry: This is what the Punjabi women give their menfolk when they want to be strong enough to perform with gusto. So men, please watch it. Ladies, watch out."

"Our vegetable dishes are neither too large nor too small. In 1951, Grandfather was forced to relocate the Punjab to its present site to be close to the Indian Embassy where many officers were homesick for authentic Punjabi vegetarian dishes."

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