Profile

Scrapbook photo 1
Scrapbook photo 2
Scrapbook photo 3
Scrapbook photo 4
Sai (saizai)
8,738 followers|2,708,373 views
AboutPostsCollectionsPhotosYouTube

Stream

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
This is rather extremely familiar to me. Minus the infection part. Weird symptoms, never properly diagnosed, told it's conversion disorder because they have no idea what would cause me to have a halfdozen ultra-rare symptoms, etc. Not saying I have ME per se, but the overlap is pretty extensive. (https://rarediseases.org/rare-diseases/myalgic-encephalomyelitis/ lists "sensitivity to sunlight", which is rather an understatement for being functionally blind in bright light.) OTOH, there seems to be no diagnostic test, and no treatment. So I'm not sure that getting diagnosed with this would even be helpful to me, except perhaps for the purposes of bureaucracies… which, come to think of it, would be very valuable.
9
4
Gretchen S.'s profile photoJennifer McClean's profile photoEd S's profile photoMarla Caldwell's profile photo
8 comments
 
CFS is commonly diagnosed before a person is diagnosed with fibromyalgia, and the two can be difficult to distinguish. The causes of both are unclear (although a combination of infection and trauma has high correlation for both) and doctors and people in general often treat both as if they're conversion disorders or simpler psychological issues.

My fiancée has a diagnosis of CFS-ME and I have one of fibromyalgia. It's been immensely frustrating for both of us, though I'm lucky to have a PCP who believes me and works with me.

A long term friend of mine has struggled just about forever for a diagnosis of her condition. The last I knew, her current doctor was suspecting porphyria, a very rare disease with extreme sunlight sensitivity and a higher need for carbs than most people. Her symptoms are very different from mine, but the experience and frustration have been very similar.
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
Back in UK. Went to GP. Finally have my meds again, plus the stuff I was supposed to've been scripped a year ago — all without being treated like scum or an addict. The difference in how one is treated for being on government healthcare here really is extremely palpable.

Of course now it'll probably take a month for me to reacclimatize. But hopefully I'll have a mostly-working brain again. That'll be nice.

Oh, and I have a sample pack of something that may or may not treat my blindness. That would be … well, I'll try not to think about it until I reacclimatize to the regular stuff and have a chance to try it. No point getting hopes up.
16
Julia Tuttle's profile photoFilip H.F. “FiXato” Slagter's profile photoSai (saizai)'s profile photo
4 comments
 
+Filip H.F. Slagter Thankfully no, I got a covering scrip. But additional tests are en route.
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
My laptop has been near death for most of a year now. SMART tests are failing; it's overheating constantly; battery lasts <2h; RAM is wonky; random crashes; HD constantly runs out due to swap even when I have 12-20GB free; etc.

More importantly, basically anything I do, like opening a website or typing a tweet, takes like 2 minutes minimum, which completely destroys flow and mental state, i.e. my ability to be productive. That also means that some things just get wiped out of feasibility entirely, like responding to some kinds of emails or posting updates about what I've been doing lately, because the extra work involved due to computer issues doubles the spoon cost.

Because RAM and CPU seem to be repeat bottlenecks, I'm thinking of getting a new macbook pro (high spec) to replace this Air as my main work machine. That would cost roughly $4.5-5k, which I don't really have. (I can't get a desktop, because I travel so damn often, and depend on my computer pretty much everywhere I go.)

Would any of y'all be willing to contribute to me upgrading my machine? If yes, your support would be much appreciated:
http://patreon.com/saizai (monthly USD)
http://s.ai/btc (bitcoin)
http://s.ai/pp (paypal)

It'd go to helping me not have to waste literally half my day waiting for the damn computer to load something, being able to look through documents on a call, etc. So I can get back to things that matter - law school applications, briefing litigation against TSA for transparency and disability rights, advocating for changes in federal rules of procedure for fairness to people who don't have a roomful of class action lawyers representing their interests, sharing court documents with the world, helping behind the scenes in various civil rights / civil liberties related coalition groups, posting about what's happening lately, etc. etc. Stuff I've still been doing this whole time, at snail's pace, and just not posting much lately.

(FWIW: this post took ~20 minutes to load, write, and post. And that's quite fast relative to most things today. At least I mostly wasn't watching my own text fill in at 1hz after I'd typed it.)
5
5
Juaquin Anderson's profile photoAlan Jaffray's profile photoSai (saizai)'s profile photo
19 comments
 
+Alan Jaffray I appreciate help in checking that I'm not trying to fix the wrong thing. Unfortunately, I think it's just that I genuinely am hitting the RAM limit, and the SSD being worn and fairly slow on swap is exacerbating that.

But yeah, it's also reminiscent of … other patterns of feedback I've gotten about how I try to fix things for food or disabilities or whatever. It's not always optimal, but I'm trying to optimize for "not having to think about this" rather than for e.g. maximum performance.
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
+Yonatan Zunger: […] because you believe in [social/political/legal] systems, and the ability of systems, when well-designed, to generate good results.
me: ugh, partisans. hate, hate, hate when people fuck with the system for partisan gain
+Yonatan Zunger: exactly. People are messing with your infrastructure and PEOPLE DO NOT MESS WITH YOUR GODDAMNED INFRASTRUCTURE, THIS STUFF IS DELICATE:
me: gerrymandeirng is a sin. amen.
+Yonatan Zunger: do you understand just how deep a religion of systems it takes to say something like "gerrymandering is a sin" as a spontaneous utterance?  ☺
me: … no? this seems self-evident […]

So apparently I'm religious after all, albeit with major self-awareness lacunae? (Maybe I should get that as a church creed…)
27
15
Aaron Gilliland's profile photoEdward Morbius's profile photo
3 comments
 
+Aaron Gilliland Is there an app for that?

And what data does it collect, for whom?
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
To add to what +Yonatan Zunger said: I have (highly controlled) meds that treat multiple significant disabilities.

If a doctor refuses to continue meds I've depended on for years, how is that morally different from taking a bat to my legs? Either way, I become medically incapacitated.

Not hypothetical, sadly. I have been for the last two months or so. My untreated baseline is pretty fucked.
 
This article is an excellent summary of something very important: addiction and dependence are not the same thing, and dependence isn't necessarily a bad thing at all.

"Dependence" means that you experience physical symptoms when you stop taking a drug. This can happen even if the drug is highly beneficial to you; it means that your body has adapted to the substance. "Addiction" means that you can't stop taking the drugs, even if they make your life worse.

This is a crucial distinction, because both laws and treatments get these mixed up, often with dangerous consequences. All opioids, for example, lead to dependence: if you've been taking them for a while, when you stop taking them you get some extremely nasty physical symptoms ("withdrawal"). But that's also true if those opioids are simply letting you live a normal life, which is a very common situation for people with the conditions that opioids are meant to treat – like serious chronic pain. If doctors (or lawyers!) mix up "dependence" with "addiction," though, they're likely to say that the fact that you experience those symptoms mean that something is seriously wrong with you, and thus cut off your supply abruptly – which is precisely the worst thing to do.

In fact, physical dependence because your body has adapted to the drug and physical dependence because your body has a serious problem without the drug are largely part of the same spectrum. Someone using opioids is dependent on them in the same way that a diabetic is dependent on insulin – and neither should stop using it without a good reason.

To quote the article:

"Physical dependence occurs very frequently with repeated opioid exposure, but dissipates promptly after a few days of opioid tapering and discontinuation," explains Nora Volkow, director of the National Institute on Drug Abuse. "Addiction occurs only in those vulnerable and is a slow process that, once it has occurred, can take months and even years to overcome and requires persistent treatment."

In other words, if pain medications are making your life genuinely better and improving your ability to love and work, what you are experiencing if you have withdrawal symptoms is dependence, not addiction. People with diabtes, for instance, are dependent on—but not addicted to— insulin; people on certain antidepressants are dependent on them, but, again, not addicted.

This confusion has its history in the medical literature itself, which had trouble getting the ideas straight over the years. The "war on drugs" has just been an excuse to make this confusion even worse.
It may seem like a trivial or academic distinction, but addiction is not dependence, and dependence is not necessarily a problem.
49 comments on original post
12
1
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
Here's our reply re certiorari on the question of whether denial of counsel is immediately appealable: <http://www.scotusblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/16-287-Pet-Cert-Reply-Brief.pdf>

We'll probably find out the Court's response ~Jan. 9.

Reading my lawyer characterizing my work is interesting. It does show a basic problem with trying to get a lawyer: if you're not good enough, then you'll get denied because you haven't presented enough merit, or you'll have failed to preserve the issue well enough to appeal correctly; if you're too good, then you must not need a lawyer.

I guess only people who somehow stumble into meritoriously presenting a case that they can't handle themselves get to actually have equal protection of law. That includes me… but this case isn't even about whether I should have a lawyer or not, but whether I can even argue the issue on immediate appeal.

The alternative is that, even if I deserve a lawyer, I would have to somehow stumble through trying a whole case myself, possibly making irreversible mistakes in the process. Then I can ask the appeals court to reverse it, only when appealing a final loss of the underlying case, years after it could've been fixed with an immediate appeal. That makes no sense to me — it's not something where you even can have a clean "do-over", let alone should — but that's what a lot of circuits currently say.

Hopefully SCOTUS agrees that's not right, and grants cert. We'll find out in a month.

Details:
https://s.ai/tsa/legal/ifp / http://www.scotusblog.com/case-files/cases/sai-v-transportation-safety-administration/
4
Filip H.F. “FiXato” Slagter's profile photoMichael Verona's profile photoSai (saizai)'s profile photo
4 comments
 
+Michael Verona Not far off, really. I don't believe the judges hold such beliefs consciously, only by their fruits.
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
1. It seems to be patched now — I can't replicate it any more — but I'm waiting on a follow-up issue and coordination / comment before disclosing. I may be writing it up more formally than here; TBD.

2. Google will pay me $1,337 + $500 for this (it was counted as two bugs). Whee, I'm still a Professional H4x0r™⸮

See <https://www.google.com/about/appsecurity/reward-program/>; it's in the category "normal Google applications" / "other valid security vulnerabilities". Not big, but still in the ~<5% of bug reports that end up qualifying for a reward.

Funnily enough (to me), paying me is currently pending an issue with how they handle bug reporters' emails, rather than my name etc. (At least for now. :-P Hopefully they've had enough Indonesian suppliers that mononyms will have arisen before, but who knows.)

3. The email issue also means that my ranking on the bughunter site is lower than it should be (as I'm only getting points for one of the two bugs — the lower-value one). I'm told they'll be fixing it in a few months. Meh, no rush — though I guess it does hit a bit of the "whee being higher in public rankings" Skinner-box. Whee reward systems.

4. I just noticed that the Google security team have a new presentation about the VRP, which may be of interest to those of you who are interested in how a major bug bounty program works behind the scenes:

https://sites.google.com/site/bughunteruniversity/behind-the-scenes/war-stories-from-google-vrp
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QoE0M7v84ZU
 
Whee, my name is on Google's vulnerability finders list. ^.^

I'll disclose the reason why after they've had time to fix the issue.

Direct link: https://bughunter.withgoogle.com/profile/4af56d88-1397-4da7-88fc-c10abc72b038
7 comments on original post
14
Kathryn Kure's profile photoFilip H.F. “FiXato” Slagter's profile photo
2 comments
 
Congrats :D
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
Updated my resume for law school applications. Mostly a tweak to reflect changes over the last year — progress in FRCP rules changes, Google vulnerability rewards, successful amicus re Klingon, progress & setbacks in IFP privacy cases. A few edits for concision & clarity.
3
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
Cert. denied on the question (arising from D.C. Cir.) of whether an order denying appointment of counsel is immediately appealable. Maybe third time's the charm, though; cert. petition on the same question from my 1st Cir. case, which is stronger, is forthcoming. In the meantime, no lawyer for me in the FOIA case, merely because I refuse to waive my right to privacy in order to exercise my right to access the courts.
Sai v. TSA et al., No. 15-2526 (1st Cir.), cert. forthcoming & Sai v. TSA, No. 16-5004 (D.C. Cir.), No. 16-287 (SCOTUS) [IFP]. Full case documents: 1st, DC, cert | previous SCOTUS cert | Other TSA litigation. Filed 2015-12-15 (1st Cir.) and 2016-01-19 (D.C. Cir.), these two cases appeal the D. MA. and ...
3
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
Very well done, fluent native ASL interpretation of Hamilton, though mostly choosing to go more for closeness to the original wording than keeping concepts and privileging rhyme over incidental lyrics. 
3
Sai (saizai)'s profile photoEd S's profile photo
3 comments
Ed S
 
Thanks!
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
Whee, my name is on Google's vulnerability finders list. ^.^

I'll disclose the reason why after they've had time to fix the issue.

Direct link: https://bughunter.withgoogle.com/profile/4af56d88-1397-4da7-88fc-c10abc72b038
19
1
Filip H.F. “FiXato” Slagter's profile photoSai (saizai)'s profile photoYash Trivedi's profile photo
7 comments
 
+Sai​ Ok thanks I'll try my best :) 
Add a comment...

Sai (saizai)

Shared publicly  - 
 
My comments to the Judicial Conference about changes to the federal rules for e-filing (CM/ECF) access for pro se litigants are at p. 112-124 of this transcript. I still need to make formal written comments; it's queued behind more important things I'm behind on. :-/

It's really weird to read a transcript of how I talk extemporaneously (even ignoring the transcription errors).

I wonder how one trains to be better at this, short of writing out a talk — or even whether it's desirable to try to make the natural cadence of spoken language match more closely to the segmentation of written language. (I have no particular training in public speaking, though I have done it regularly and seem to have at least some aptitude for it. I use an outline, not any verbatim prepared language, except perhaps a rehearsed quip or two.)

On a tangentially related note, here's a paper entitled The politics of transcription: https://escholarship.org/uc/item/6581373n

(That's /via Al(That's /via 's interesting talk about revising the hacker ethic: http://opentranscripts.org/transcript/programming-forgetting-new-hacker-ethic/)
3
Add a comment...
Sai's Collections
Story
Tagline
Syncretist
Introduction
Hi! My full name is Sai; my handle is saizai.

Right now, I'm primarily working on Make Your Laws (G+), a practical liquid democracy project. I also have CogSai (G+), a YouTube channel about cognitive science.

- I was twice suspended :-/

MYL disclaimer: things I post to my own stream are my own musings, not official positions on behalf of Make Your Laws. If I don't mention MYL, they're not even that, they're just my own personal political beliefs — something I do not mix with the non-partisan, systemic PoV I take with MYL. If you're reporting on MYL, please respect the difference; I do not want to be a public figure, and my personal political beliefs are not relevant.

If I know you outside G+, or if you have something interesting for us to talk about that hasn't come up in comments, please send me a private message. Unfortunately, I just get too many adds to track them. If I don't add you back, that's only a comment about my lack of mental bandwidth, not about you; I still enjoy good crunchy conversation, though.

About G+:

G+ games:
Mafia/Werewolf signup; games #1 #2 



I'm interested in lots and lots of things; this is only a small part of them. See my website for more: http://s.ai

[Last updated: ~2013]
Bragging rights
I'm mononymous; my full legal name is just "Sai".
Basic Information
Gender
agender
Other names
saizai
Work
Occupation
Syncretist