I'm a geek. I've always been a geek. Taking all that into account, it seems a damn good bet I'll always be a geek.
I solve problems. If you don't want me to solve problems, keep them away from me - I can't help it, it's built in.
I'm openly opinionated. If it bothers you terribly, I guess we won't be friends.
I'm lazy, and I'm awfully good at it. Laziness carried to it's logical conclusion is indistinguishable from efficiency. Sometimes to be truly lazy you will have to do things the hard way JUST so that you will never have to be bothered fixing it later. I find this works best with rude and/or obnoxious customers. Plus it will annoy them that you did a good job in spite of their attitudinal dysfunction and lack of manners. For the kill shot, smile and wish them a good day!
I think that any job worth doing is worth doing right. If you're taking a paycheck for it, I will expect you to do the job right. If that bothers you, please find another job. And let me know where, I won't shop or do business there EITHER.
If you're situationally stuck in a job where you don't get paid enough or treated well, I feel for you, but you have no right WHATSOEVER to take it out on your customers or coworkers - you took the job, you deal with the consequences (also see the previous item about doing a job well or not at all). If you just want to commiserate, expect to hear some stories back from me that might just make your hair curl and/or skin crawl.
If you ask me a question, you'll get an answer. If the answer is not to your liking, oh well. I won't lie just because the truth might not be pleasant. Sometimes the truth sucks. We have to pick up and move on.
I won't verbally abuse you just for the sake of it, not at all. But if my words are harsh, it's only because that's the reality of it from my point of view. I can't tell you much about anyone else's point of view, at least not until someone invents a network port that hooks into the brain.
I do a fairly good job of playing devil's advocate and imagining other points of view, but that's about it - I am not a multiple personality, so 99.9% of the time I have but a single opinion on any given topic that is really and truly my own. Oh, and if that bothers you, again I guess we won't be friends because that, too, is built in.
I am, however, open minded and I love learning, so just because yesterday I didn't like garlic on my PBJ, I may have learned something to convince me to take another try at it since last we discussed it. For the record, NO, I do NOT think garlic would be good on a PBJ. That just sounds like one of those weird ice cream flavors the Japanese would come up with.
I'm a smart alec and have an often dark and off beat sense of humor. This, too, can't be turned off. If I like you and I don't make wise responses to things you say/do I may not have noticed or I'm probably unconscious, not feeling well, or mad about something - maybe you, maybe not, but don't get pushy when I'm quiet, it won't go well.
If I use a stereotype or make some overtly obnoxious remark, it's probably just me making a joke that missed it's mark badly. Don't be offended by it. If you need to be offended by me, pick another item on the list, there are some good ones to choose from.
The one, seemingly constant, aspect of my life is enjoying music. If my sense of humor seems odd, you should take a peek at my music collection. You can find a link to my Blip.fm "station" over on the side in the links section for a very brief sampling.
If I sound a little too much like Gregory House without the cane and MD, or Gordon Ramsay without all the knife sharpening, then I've done a fairly good job of describing myself.
If you like me, that's fine. If you don't like me, that's fine too. Everyone can not possibly like every other person unless they're not being truthful about it. But whatever you feel about me, you can't honestly say I didn't at least try to make you grin.
If you want to follow me on Twitter, I'm rangerwinslow over there. I had to remove the link in an attempt to unhook Twitter from Buzz.