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That is so stupid!!!! If it were true...these so called parents are heartless and unloving and undeserving of a child. A child who acts like that isn't brain dead....they are just plain LAZY!!!
Me too! Even if it is sillier than I am.
the onion is the of my favs
Is this for real??? The child needed therapy.
Thats sick. Maybe she was just in a depression. Do the parents realize how stupid they sound? Thats the most incommpassionate thing I have ever seen. Hate to be judgemental, but I don't think that they ever loved her in the first place.And it's not possible to "legally" kill someone anyway
Are you for real, killing me right now? LMAO!
I love the people who think this stuff is real...
"Are you for real killing me right now?" ahahah I can't breathe
This has gotta be a joke about kids today!
Horrible! It would be a criminal act to end her life!
well u should working at school more then just texting women wake yr as up
Joe Lewis
I, for one, welcome this new and exciting brand of parenting! Truly, we are now living in a more enlightened, compassionate society!
LMAO! It sounds like a few on here need to be "treated" as well.
Tim Smith
People are still thinking the onion is real? I hate people.
Yea, shes useless, i'm surprised her friends still text her, she can't be that exciting....lolz, the screenshot opp';s here are great, love when +The Onion gets in a news stream....
That's a spreading virus... let's suppress them before it's too late. :^D
Steve C
This is why we can't have nice things!!
G-d help us. Every person is an entire world. Whoever takes another life will be held accountable. I hope this story is not true. guy's think this is real? that's pretty disturbing.
Awww, don't spoil our fun, Garrett ;) This is my favorite thing so far today!
and you're a loser get a life kid
satire news.. this is my first time to see these kinds of stuffs and thought it was for real.. haha
so not true and not even something to joke about
im loling. omg thats horrible? whoever posted that really need a brain and maybe then they know it fake
+Aimee Cohen... seriously. Think about it for a minute. Did you read the article? Do you know what is? Do you know what the Internet is? Do you believe everything you read?
Just curious. I know that curiosity and critical thinking is strange for many people.
I take it the Onion is an outcrop of The National Enquirer and The Globe.. but on tv.......... this thing wouldn't have been funny if it were on Comedy Central, either. Onion is getting deleted from my circles. pathetic
The life of a teen... hahah, awesome!
But even more awesome are the people who believe this is true (: I laugh at stupidity, hah!
+Steve Cottrill: As you clearly didn't know what it is, why the hell was it in your circles in the first place?
Steve C
+Steve Cottrill it's comedy, how did it even end up in your circles in the first place?
And also... why don't people ever read the comments before THEY comment? Don't you think it might help to read what others have... nevermind. Everyone just wants to get their worthless comment in. sigh None of them would even be reading this - just you critical thinkers. waving
This is silly. But some teens are actually like this.
Michael - it ended up as a "hot on google+" post, so everyone saw it, even folks who don't know about the onion... then we got all these comments, and they're my favorite thing ever (today). I also suspect at least some of them are fake too ;) (I hope so)
meh. Nice try, Onion.
I think you should stick to print, FWIW.
+Joe Lewis: Ah, okay, that makes sense. I nearly never check the "What's Hot" section and sometimes forget about it entirely. That would explain the comments from people who clearly have no idea what +The Onion is...which is still really weird, but it makes sense.
I've got to test this on some proper teen brains to see if they are dead. :)
ROTFL. Dunno, but someone said that Onions make one cry... so it must be a real sad story :^D
What is a sin? Why don't you pay for keeping him alive, I'm sure they"ll not disconnect him.
hey Subas Tuladhar, your an idiot. im still a kid and i would lie if i said i send more than 2 texts a day, and i spend an **HOUR** on facebook or on google +!!! have more interesting things to do besides that stuff!!!
Steve C
ITT: People who who don't know The Onion is a joke and the people who love them.
is this true!?!?! if so, it's HEARTBREAKING!!!!!! I must be praying for her parents, they need the Lord! I'm this true or not??
Someone doesn't understand sarcasm...
Okay, as amusing as reading comments from people who have no idea what they're talking about can be, it's starting to distract me from other things I need to do on G+ this morning. I'm actually already late for +Maria Quiban's Hangout. Muting this post now.

The sad thing is that it is fake. The world would be better off with a little judicious pruning
Tom Cross
My forehead is starting to get sore from all the facepalming
The girl seems braindead to me lol

The Onion, FTW (><)
Seeing all the comments from folks who don't know about The Onion is making me feel a bit troll-ish. Perhaps a few posts from Landover Baptist Church are in order?
I completely understand their pain. When our children first began exhibiting symptoms, we made the difficult decision to keep them on life support, and pay the Verizon bill. But I can definitely understand their decision. My heart goes out to these poor people.
Holy shit people. Where the hell are your brains!!!???? Who doesnt know in this day and time that +The Onion is satire?? Good lord.
Excellent satire. The Onion at it's irreverent best! lol
That's a lie. That is just being a lazy parent who raised a lazy daughter.
What a load of bullcrap. If she is brain dead, how can she even text ? let alone lift her hand to text ?
As a parent of a 7 and 4 year old, both of whom steal my iDevices on a regular basis, I am considering moving to the forest and living a simpler life of foraging for nuts and berries, and trapping critters for dinner.
If only all parents were as humane...
oo God . that is very painful ........fuck Facebook
Joe Lewis
I feel bad for her parents. This must have been a horribly difficult decision, but look at the facts, people. They clearly had to do SOMETHING. "IDK my BFF Jill" "lol u wnt 2 gt food" look at the things children like her text. That's barely language. Clearly something is wrong, and these poor children are suffering from a debilitating amount of brain damage. Show some compassion, people!
Isnt this every 13 year old with a smart phone and uncontrolled internet access? Noone thinks this is real... I hope. If so, you need to be scheduled for trip to Euthanasia
That is funnier than hell...and is more wide spread than previously thought. I've got a 12 yr old with many of the same symptoms.
i cant believe after all those comments about onion being a news satire organization , people are still believing this to be true......!

guys its FAKE...
I don't understand why these people need to apply euthanasia to these kind of cases.. She is alive, stupid but alive.
I'm new to this whole + thing....Don't understand how circle groups work but this popped up???
Nik Red
+Leris Luppoy It's fake. For amusement, for our generation to learn something from it.
This gives me tears in my eyes. Onions always do that.
so funny but my question is why give a child that age a phone? especially an expensive one like the Iphone?
this kid provides a great argument in favor of euthanasia.
I need my kids to be euthanized also. They are brain dead, they will start to react only if I show them a 20 dollars bill...hahaha
+Dakota Bartley Best comment to this just because "shelfless." That'll show those people without shelves!
The comments from people who don't know this is a joke are as funny as the joke itself. Bwahaha.
This is true Evergreen. I've sent it to my teens twice now.
they are right about the organs... but what else can her parents do? nothing. I think it was a good decision. like they said.."the real caitlin is already gone"
I don't see a problem with the youth in asia?
obviously this is fake.
Be aware that there are some of those that suffer as Caitlin does, who grow out of the near catatonic state. I've seen it happen in some cases, as they age. Best to at least wait til she's out of the "teen" they tend to become more human and awaken to the reality of life beyond the confinements of their rooms. Just saying....
...hahahaa ... this is quit interesting...
Oh Rebecca Corley, you beat me to it. Was going to say the same thing. Actually, so MANY people believed it's actually kind of depressing....
It's not her fault, neither its the fault of parents. Needs systematic training of mind.. I think, its more of emotional disorder. Can be treated, if she is introduced to something more interesting, than facebooking, messaging.. Now need to understand, what her understandings her, she lives in her mind.
LOL I was puzzling over how a brain-dead teen could possibly text then I noticed the source was The Onion and it all clicked. Nice one!
Where are the Republican politicians? Everyone please send this link to a local or national Repub. so we can get them on record!
Second Hand Ignorance - oh God we're toast!
I wonder how many of these people who think +The Onion is real also believe that "Harry Potter leads directly Satanism" story that they posted over a decade ago.

FWIW, people not seeing THAT as satire is what directly led me to jettison a lot of my conservative christian beliefs.
THIS is why we can't have death panels. :(
omfg are you shitting me!?!? this shit is so fake.
EVERYONE! this is NOT real! The Onion is a comedic website that makes up this stuff to get a shock out of people,.... please be read whatever the onion says with caution and be mindful that it may not be truth!
We can claim, without a doubt, the education is totally wrong.. totally wrong... really wrong.. we begin with making the kids to start everything with facts. We make them dependent on the facts.. for being happy in the future they need factual support. They forget there real charm, the real person.
i will. I'll think of the children
Install Linux on her computer and take away the iPhone and replace it with an Android device -- that will save her.
I don't understand why people are so upset. This is an eminently modest proposal.
I remember reading comments from horrified readers on the 8 Billion Dollar Abortion Super Complex article on a religious message board. Then one by one, people started to realize it might be a fake news. My favorite response (paraphrasing): "Guys this might be fake...the website also says NASA is nearing completion of a giant earth sock."
Luckily i was born in Sri Lanka.No one will not try to end me like this.
wtf i hate school computers...were not aloud to watch any f-ing things on facebook or youtube
She's got more life than me on a monday morning! Well funny...
Thats weird... did they actually kill her???
rhi rhi
thats so sad. :(
Mark W. What do you mean by "really"?
You know what's WAY funnier than the onion on Google+? The people commenting who think that the stories are true.
john t
gotta love it
could some people please watch their language. there could be children looking at this. thank you!!
Jesus Christ came to seek and to save that which was lost.....
$100 says that he parents are religious.
fake or not no one has the right to take another life "Trigun" what about animals! "thou shalt not kill" Slapps me in the face "ouch" Maybe it's a secret Survey
Anyone who thinks this is real and has never heard of the Onion needs to be euthanized...
if they are religious,that must be some religion! even if this one video isn't true, just think of some kids in the world that are really going through this!!! :( that's why they need our prayers!!!! those of us who are Christians.
more like youth-anized, amiright?
where is love ? parents asking the legal to kill daughter...WTF ?
I am a born again Christian, just trying to serve my Lord. not a retard.
Laugh because its funny. Cry because it's true.
very bad god should not have do it.
We pray for her Brain re activation by miracles of all mighty
how...fucking stupid are these people? shes...fucking bitchy teen with a cell o.o
OMG that is absolutely horrible if this article is in fact true.
I do not know what to think or say about this
HAHA! On a more serious point-- I blame the parents.

"Are you for real killing me right now?"

I wonder if she was able to text during the administration?
ROFLMAO...My thanks to the ONION for the funniest "News" of the day!!!
It's just a real shame that so many people think that this is a real story. What a sad commentary on the human race.
I am sitting here ROLLING in laughter at the people who seriously believe this is real. This is a perfect example of how people will believe ANYTHING put in front of them, especially when it comes from a supposed "News Source".....Even if it's twisted words, and fallacies. Hmm....
Didn't think it was funny. It's not trivial when someone you love has zero quality of life.
She may mur-mur "are you for real killing me right now?" lol
Those complaining about the serious comments, please stop immediately. One of the greatest comedic gifts the onion has ever given us is the people who don't know what it is.
Juna G
People are hilarious.
Anybody that has teen children can relate to this satire.
Jonathan, what do you mean cool story? please let me know:) thanks!!
THE ONION NEWS is a satire newsgroup, no one is actually killing their daughter you retards. Its making an ironic statement on teen dependence on technology to the detriment of their actual lives.
Also, Hail Satan.
Counted 7 people in 245 who were outraged... Thats 2.8% of the general population. 2.8% who need to certified as cabbages and scheduled for an a$$whooping for failing common sense and possible school.
Keefe Gonzalez- I am new to this "onion" and to Google+ so please give me a break!
Oh my god !!!! That was so wired!!!
+Hailey Hewuse , +The Onion has been around since the mid-90s. I was reading it in High School.

Honestly, it baffles the Hell out of me that in 2012 there are a lot of (North American) people who haven't heard of the Onion and are posting on social media sites.
Very classy. They did that quite well.
someone said that "they didn't want to be judgmental, but ..." thinking this was real. Two things make me very sad. One, they thought this was real. Two, if they did think this was real, that they WEREN'T being judgmental! Exactly what would you be judgmental about then?
LOL! The Onion strikes again. Once again proving more people that should be able to, still cannot tell the difference between satire and a real news article.

Wake up, people taken in by it. It's fake. Its supposed to be laughed at. The girl is every teen.
What was the need of killing her?
Don't they have a little space in their house for her?
Is she disturbing any body?
How can a mother kill her's child?
thats very very mean what her parents said
Exposed to harmful levels of stupidity
Some of the comments above is proof of that!
Best part about these posts is reading comments to see all the idiots who don't understand what satire is.
Man the video was funny but I pissed myself laughing at all the comments of people that think its for real. I mean come on guys braindead but able to text, talk, go to school, go on facebook.... I know loads of people who must be braindead by those definitions. Best laugh I've had all week.
Zong Z
HAHA, Another Onion News troll
oh my they actually killed her ho-hum back to facebok
I don't like the bad language on here. I'd better leave.
hello how are you sweet baby and may the blessings of be with you sweet baby
Some people are dumb as fuck, The Onion is a satirical "news" paper. It is not real, dont believe everything you read. Anyways this was a funny article
That's terrible. These parents obviously don't remember what they were like when they were teenagers. They need to do some real self evaluation and remember what big jerks they were when they were young. I think the parents need therapy -not the child. Anyone who thinks it is ok to joke about putting someone to death for typical age related behavior also needs therapy
I have contacted the parents and agreed to have her personal belongings photographed. I plan to publish them via an App. I will give the profit of that App to charity (minus developing costs, of course)
start a prayer group ask everyone to pray ring ereryone go on try god bless i am no 1
LOL!!! The Onion is like that. There have been some stories I wasn't sure about, keeps you on your toes.
god certainly hav better plan, trust
I can't tell if this is real or not. If this is fake, the people have horrible acting abilities.
iR Khan
those who think this is real shoudnt be on G+ ! :-D !
I'd want my family to do the same. I'm going to update my DPA tonight.
If you genuinely thought this was for real, you are one of the stupidest people alive. Please confine yourself to your house so as not to hurt anyone with your stupidity. And whatever you do, do NOT reproduce!
//MFW I see the amount of fucking retards taking this seriously
Gotta love The Onion! It's too bad so many ppl don't seen to know what The Onion is all about.
Agreed that some of these comments are funnier than the video itself!
People, please! It is true. I mean, it's the internet. You can't just publish anything you want on it, right? </sarcasm> I've fallen for a few Onion stories myself. ;-)
i am kinda the same..
i hope my parents don't see this post...
wow im sorry but im freaking 14 and i text and do all that stuff and im not brain dead god wow
Cal vin
@ 2:17 "I have cramps. And I don't even..." - Caitlin

ann kj
That is crazy. That's what every teenager does. Please tell me this is a joke. Ridiculous.
Hysterical! To parents of teens, my son is 19 & a freshman in college now, and there ARE signs of life again! Slow, true, but he IS coming back! Stay hopeful!!! :-)
This is amazing I wish the would make a scare video for kids like this...I would buy it for my friends brainless kids.
ok these parents hav an F-ing problem and so does their dahgter just take her away from the house and get her therapy
....colin.. its the onion....think national enquirer.
don't believe all these people who try to tell you this news story isn't true they are just trying to justify themselves and make you feel better trust me it's true every word
Wow, the comments are even funnier than the video.
thats funny. lol. onion is always great at news skits.
I am amazed by the volume of people on here who think this is real...Jesus. IT IS A JOKE! I bet you think Sasquatch and the Easter Bunny are chillin' at the North Pole with Santa Claus while waiting for Peter Pan to show up. Damn!
if u think this is real..your an idiot ..but the point of it is totally true....typical teens
I have two teens and I found out a long time ago they will read a text or post and get back to you sooner than anything else!
She shouldn't have died!!!!!!!!!!
Some people don't understand that The Onion is a parody site, and that makes me facepalm.
OMG I can't believe any parent would really euthanize a child for texting. These people are sick and need psychological help! Everyone condoning this heinous act will be tormented forever in a lake of fire, just like they deserve. You are all sick, heartless, evil people. OMG. OMG, I say!

(sorry, couldn't resist. Do love the Onion! And the comments to this post...)
this is messed up. don't euthanize harmless people. It is also jacked that someone texts that much, who is that STUPID! she is atleast talking. that IS JACKED UP!!!!!
Fucking common sense and critical thinking, how does it work!?

Willing to bet that the majority of the people taking this seriously are American. No wonder the rest of the world laughs at us. Thanks, assholes. 
People who "think" this is real are trolling you folks..... I hope
Obviously this is just satirical fiction, but it is a very real problem.
With a rather simple solution.
Take away her phone and her computer and her iPod and whatever else she wastes all day on.
The girl's gonna drown in school later on if she doesn't learn time management skills now. And laying around and texting all day isn't very good time management.
God I can't stand my own generation sometimes.
Its not possible to legally kill someone. You can see how fake this is.
The video was funny, but reading the comments and realizing how many people thought it was real. (Priceless)
Some of the responses are funnier than the video.
Baa, baa, said the little lambs.
I have to show this Onion article to my teen niece!... if only I could get her to stop texting....
Oh WOW! I couldn't even finish reading the comments. The amount of stupidity is astounding! I think the onion should write a story on some of the people in their circle that don’t know how they got "the onion" in their circle and don’t realize it’s just for laughs. Please, I beg of you, please stop being stupid. Stop it! (Snaps and points finger) don’t be stupid! It hurts other people!
Excellent way to present a real problem with our kids today...
I just got "that look" from an entire airplane while literally laughing out loud at this post
The Onion is so wrong. How do I stop seeing The Onion on my news feed? I don't recall asking to see them.
ohhh...I'm really moved...I think it's really cruel of the parents to decide for her life...CAITLIN SHOULD DECIDE whether she wants to continue her life or not....
She looks American. What's all this about youth in Asia?
Jayne B
hahaha that is hilarious!!! even more hilarious are the people who think its real
These people just brightened my Friday, if you know what I mean.
Yes, teens are so hooked on their phones, they seem "brain-dead" to everything else going on around them.
Rob M
Wow I needed that today. Absolutely brilliant! I haven't decided if its funny or sad for those that don't know what The Onion is about. And the "youth in Asia" comment, epic.
Haha.. Poor teenagers, they will die very soon.. but wait! Adults are exempted, right? XD
i dont know, what i do know is that this has got to be complete bullshit. and unless i get some REAL proof that this can even happen i remain firm in my belief that these idiots murdered that girl.
God says, all murders will go to hell. No one has the right to take another life. The parents didn't show this girl love. She was a distraction to them, a burden they refused to carry. God Almighty will judge you all for this decision. She needed Jesus in her life. He was the one who gave her life to you. Such a crying shame! May God have mercy on any other child that may become like this child did. What is wrong with you people? Where has all the love gone?
VIrgilio......seriously? It's the don't know? Do you even know what the Onion is?
Me after reading some people's comments, "I don't want to live on this planet anymore."
Dude. Chill out. It's a joke.
as aumsing as the whole thing was i didnt laugh into he said the dr euthanized his secretary for eating up all the waiting room candy thats so much worse
Really?TAKE THE PHONE!!!Is this real???
Rob M
Some people simply missed the boat with this one. sigh
lol ... +wesley edwards I hate to tell this to you bro, but IT'S A JOKE. This isn't really happening, feel free to take a breath now.
The article is funny. Now to the real issue here. Everyone who commented on this post not knowing that the onion is very well done news parity outlet, should be euthanized.
1:19- sign not the right says:
she's not brain dead; she's just an idiot!
hahha lol loving this pic :)
Do you morons not know what the onion is ffs?!?
Andy L
The comments in this post are a direct result of Google+ allowing the kids in. Ah well..
oh c'mon folks. are we supposed to believe it for good?
HAHHAHA More humerous than the video are the people that actually believe a video made by The Onion is real seriously people. Take 5 seconds to think before you post maybe?
It doesn't surprise me that people are thinking this is real! Abortion is real....not much difference between the two. And in this day in never know what a parent will do to there children. But in this video you can obviously tell these people were acting (trying to anyway). Most teens do act this way though. Some younger children too....when my 6yr old is on her laptop....she is in a whole other zone! LOL
+Virgilio Ramos This is a joke... Google the Onion News Network. If you think this is real, then you should also believe all of their other videos.

Also: I'm a teenager, and I approve this video.
Lol no onion news is for fun none of its real
Thank God! My parent did not reare me in that way but let pray 4 here.
The Onion should be euthanized and put out of our misery.

Their spoofs are meant to lure unsuspecting people into believing the most outlandish stupidity imaginable.
yeah the comments on here made me laugh way more than the video itself!!! XD
wats up nice picks y so down
Rob M
+George Hood Obviously you don't have a sense of humor. Move along ...
This is totes fake. Those getting up in arms about it need to not be dumb. its called humor people. 
LMFAO this is a joke right they have to drag her to school wtf..... just take away her phone LOL
I feel so sad for her. :(
I'm with +Ami Maves , etc on this: People taking the onion seriously are all shades of awesome.
omg, I'm lying on the couch whining all day. am I going to die?
OMG this is funny I can't see why people why anyone would get upset their acting is bad too LOL
This is hilarious to me!! This story is fake, fake, fake!! Probably the same ones who believe this story give their social security number to a stranger over the phone!!
The amount of ignorance in this world is staggering. The Onion is a satire news station people, it's called humor! Get a sense of one before it's too late!!!
this is so sad, god bless the children of the world
RIP angel , it bad bad decision . may God receive ur soul with his love
Hard to believe that I fell for this until I read the article through
I hope this is a joke! If this is a joke, it's not funny. Please remove this post.
^Yes, because things from the onion are all to real...
Erik S
She is in a better place... XD
This is very twisted fare and, frankly, the Onion is disgusting.
lol, why do people think this is real? Euthanizing a human is known as murder....
Dude, guys, this is real. The Onion always tells the truth.
+George Hood Well said, man whose profile pic is the one photo where he looks like Hitler.
By the way, you aren't supposed to tell them it isn't real. Herpderp.
Rob M
Dear Idiots,

This is not real. You suck at life for thinking it is. Please /wrist.

Thank you
this is not cool. what kind of parents are they?
The people who can't tell satire apart from truth are what's wrong with society. You take this as a joke, but now a little girl is dead! SHE'S DEAD!!!!
Helloooo? It's joke people watch video all the way through. Hysterical!
I am still laughing hysterically at people who can't spend five minutes researching what The Onion is.
This is better be a joke. They're not serious right?
i think its intended to make people think what they are doing with their life. how often does your teen rool eyes at you? what can you "DO" with them? get off your butts people and start living again in the real world!
shes only that way cause shes a virgin.
Rob M
+Sarah LeVesque I'm advocating its a joke and disgusted people don't realize it is in fact a joke. Of course I clicked it. The Onion is the best! :-)
When I read the title I thought it was a joke. I can't believe this girl was euthanized. It makes me sick! She was responsive. It looked to me like she was in deep depression, and no wonder. The doctor in this case is a quack--a sicko! If she could text, feed herself, dress herself, she was a viable person. In either case, she is loved by God. Shame! Shame on her parents and that quack of a doctor!
I can't stop laughing !!!!! Thanks for sharing!
+Zulkarnain K. THEY ARE!
I guess we have to tell the population every 75 comments that The Onion is a comedy site. THIS IS NOT REAL NEWS!

If this was true then most of us wouldn't be here today. Thanks God.
Rob M
+Sam Damon You're too young to be in this thread. Bookmark it and come back in 3 years. :)
That is so sad, but it seems like this is some of what is happening now to most children.
is that true?
i think its n0t. . .
Max Lee
Yes it is
looks fake to me.but if it is true, then her parents are stupid
do some of you not understand this is a joke? its pure satire...
o plzzzzzzzzzzzzz....!!!! This cannot be true.. bullshit
When I saw the Onion I knew it was fake.
i think i'll go hang my self for this
i lost hope on humanity
o yeah, forgot one thing: THE LAZINESS OF THAT GIRL, IS TO DAMN HIGH!
Her laziness level is OVER 9000!!!
I have to say that was really funny. Apple must of got a kick out of this story, a girl who can only text, watch tv and listen to Justin Bieber cd's. Sounds like every other young American 13 year old. I like the story after about the secratary euthanized cause she would only eat the office candy. Euthanize me cause I know it's only rock n roll but I like it.
i seriously cannot believe that they did that i mean that's not worth killing your child over.......... right
that guy who was gonna give her the shot acts like this is so normal... and the parents are so careless."better be lucky ur kid doesnt have a piss-poor attitude....
Okay, you made me laugh in the middle of a yawn.  Who do I sue?
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