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ALBANY, NY—Emergency crews called to the scene described the remains of the victims as "slightly more lifeless than they were before the accident."
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Laura Tomaja's profile photoBrian J's profile photoKelvin Gyoerick's profile photoVictor Chudnovsky's profile photo
18 comments
 
When told that President Calvin Coolidge was dead, literary wit Dorothy Parker asked, "How can you tell?"
 
fuck this why is it okay to disrespect the dead lives of people who were homeless or not as good as the average person. Fuck the onion thats cold.
 
If you take the Onion seriously then you're doing it wrong. I'm not quite sure satire is the correct word for this, but it's bringing to light a life many of us would simply ignore.
 
Dark and hilarious...just why I love The Onion
 
If they lived in Albany, they probably were miserable.
 
whoever says bad shit about the onion should go fuck a cantalope
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